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Advice from a recovering workaholic: break free
When work is all consuming, it can exact a high price. This is not news to anyone who has grown up with work-obsessed parents or who loves their job so much that it has become part of who they are.
It's a familiar topic for Bryan E. Robinson, a psychotherapist in Asheville, N.C. He's been writing about work-life balance for more than 20 years, and has updated his guidance in an aptly-titled book, Chained to the Desk in a Hybrid2 World.
As a college professor, Robinson found his anxiety would rise in his idle moments. His work compulsion — even while on vacation — led to frayed3 relations with his spouse4. He reflects on this experience in the book, while sharing the stories of other work-obsessed people.
In the introduction, Robinson writes, "Many clinicians and business leaders — vast numbers of whom are workaholics themselves — still do not recognize workaholism, job burnout, or eighteen-hour pressure cooker days as a mental health problem."
In 2019, the World Health Organization took a step in that direction when it included burnout as an "occupational phenomenon" in its International Classification of Diseases handbook.
In an interview with NPR's A Martinez, Robinson said Americans need to be more mindful of the long-term consequences of overworking. "If I fight my workaholism, that's like fighting the fire department when your house is on fire," he said. "You add stress. You don't fight yourself. You don't attack yourself. You bring compassion5 to it."
So in his book, Robinson attempts to answer the question "how do you bring compassion to the part of you that wants to work day and night instead of fight it?"
The interview has been lightly edited for clarity and length.
A work addict6 is someone who uses their work like a drug addict or someone a compulsive gambler. And it comes from a deeper need inside. I remember times when there was a weekend and there was nothing to do, at least personally to do — how terrifying that was for me.
I remember one occasion where I searched for some project and read the newsletter at the university, and there was a call for grants. And how calm I felt when I put the handout7 under my arm, just like an alcoholic8 putting a bottle under his arm. For me, I'm recovering. But my work for a long time was anesthetic9; it really calmed me down. Without it, my anxiety went through the roof.
On what work addiction10 looks like in 2023
Now, there are different levels of work addiction: People who are work addicts11 or even workaholics tend to bring that with them to the workplace. It's their compulsiveness, and they will often seek work out if it's not strenuous12 enough. And I know saying that sounds counterintuitive. Most people are trying to avoid work. Why would someone want to work? Well, because there's a deeper reason for it.
This is not about hard work. This is about compulsive overworking and the inability to turn it off to the point that people's lives go down the tubes. The Japanese have a term for it: karoshi, or "death from overwork." Working from seven in the morning to 11 at night. Forty-year-olds keel over at their desks. We don't even have a word for it in our culture. We talk about overworking or workaholism but we don't talk about people who are dying from it — and they actually do.
On the symptoms of a workaholic
One is the internal signs and those can be physical, physiological13, stress related symptoms, such as gastrointestinal issues, anxiety, headaches. And psychosomatic illnesses. The other is from the outside. I'm kind of amazed at some of the employers that I work with, actually. They don't want workaholics working for them because they feel like they're really not as productive — they're so busy manufacturing work that they don't get done what needs to get done.
On how to change how you think about work
Well, one of the ways is paying attention to what's going on inside. We have parts or protectors that take over and they eclipse us. They eclipse who we really are sometimes. And recovery, healthy living and happiness are about not allowing these aspects of us to run the show and pull us around by the nose.
We're not passengers in our bodies. And so we don't want anything to drive us. We want to get out of the steering14 wheel and whatever is driving us, we want to put it in the passenger seat and fasten the seat belt. But everybody wants to be driving their own life.
And when I say driving, I'm not talking about being driven. I'm talking about being drawn15 instead of driven. Drawn is when we come from that center. I call it the "C-mode" because it's calm, curious, confident, clear. The way to get there is to not let the survival parts of us take over.
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| n.抄本，誊本，副本，肄业证书 | |
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hybrid
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| n.(动，植）杂种，混合物 | |
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frayed
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| adj.磨损的v.（使布、绳等）磨损，磨破( fray的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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spouse
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| n.配偶(指夫或妻) | |
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compassion
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| n.同情，怜悯 | |
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addict
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| v.使沉溺；使上瘾；n.沉溺于不良嗜好的人 | |
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handout
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| n.散发的文字材料；救济品 | |
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alcoholic
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| adj.（含）酒精的，由酒精引起的；n.酗酒者 | |
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anesthetic
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| n.麻醉剂，麻药；adj.麻醉的，失去知觉的 | |
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addiction
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| n.上瘾入迷，嗜好 | |
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addicts
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| 有…瘾的人( addict的名词复数 )； 入迷的人 | |
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strenuous
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| adj.奋发的，使劲的；紧张的；热烈的，狂热的 | |
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physiological
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| adj.生理学的，生理学上的 | |
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steering
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| n.操舵装置 | |
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drawn
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| v.拖，拉，拔出；adj.憔悴的，紧张的 | |
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