如何与一直不喜欢的人打交道?

 【英文原文】

Dear Annie: I am a 24-year-old female and have been friends with "Danielle" for 12 years. In fact, she is the only friend I have. Recently, I expressed some personal frustrations¹ to her about my brother-in-law's lifestyle. Last weekend, he came to visit and was obviously angry with me, but refused to say why. My brother-in-law and Danielle converse² often, and I am fairly certain she told him what I said. This isn't the first time Danielle has done spiteful things to me. I have even called some things to her attention, and she apologizes, but nothing changes. In the past, I have overlooked Danielle's underhanded behavior in order to save our friendship. I want to confront her about this latest incident, but don't know how to do it without hurting her emotionally. — Confidences Betrayed in N.C.

Dear N.C.: If this latest incident turns out to be Danielle's fault and you confront her, at best she will follow custom and apologize but change nothing. This is a toxic³ friendship, where you think it's necessary to appease⁴ her every time she hurts you. Apologize to your brother-in-law for whatever you may have done that upset him, and be cordial—nothing more—to Danielle. You need to branch out and find more trustworthy friends.

1 frustrations   

挫折( frustration的名词复数 )； 失败； 挫败； 失意

参考例句：

• The temptation would grow to take out our frustrations on Saigon. 由于我们遭到挫折而要同西贡算帐的引诱力会增加。
• Aspirations will be raised, but so will frustrations. 人们会产生种种憧憬，但是种种挫折也会随之而来。

2 converse   

vi.谈话，谈天，闲聊；adv.相反的，相反

参考例句：

• He can converse in three languages.他可以用3种语言谈话。
• I wanted to appear friendly and approachable but I think I gave the converse impression.我想显得友好、平易近人些,却发觉给人的印象恰恰相反。

3 toxic   

adj.有毒的，因中毒引起的

参考例句：

• The factory had accidentally released a quantity of toxic waste into the sea.这家工厂意外泄漏大量有毒废物到海中。
• There is a risk that toxic chemicals might be blasted into the atmosphere.爆炸后有毒化学物质可能会进入大气层。

4 appease   

v.安抚，缓和，平息，满足

参考例句：

• He tried to appease the crying child by giving him candy.他试图给那个啼哭的孩子糖果使他不哭。
• The government tried to appease discontented workers.政府试图安抚不满的工人们。