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Finding A Way Home Through 'The Door Of No Return'
play pause stop mute unmute max volume 00:0000:00repeat repeat off Update Required To play the media you will need to either update your browser1 to a recent version or update your Flash plugin. KELLY MCEVERS, HOST:
NPR's Gene2 Demby thought his recent trip to Ghana would be fun and uncomplicated. Instead it got him thinking about his family story.
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GENE DEMBY, BYLINE3: So the family lore4 goes something like this. My mother was getting a checkup before a trip to Ghana with her boyfriend, who was from Accra. Then her doctor told her that she was pregnant with twins. Her trip to the motherland was going to have to wait. I was in my early 20s the first time my mother told me that story. And for decades, she'd put much of her life on hold for my sister and me. We were those twins.
I said nothing about the passing mention of her old boyfriend, my father. And that story came to mind a few weeks ago when my girlfriend and I landed in Accra for a friend's wedding. At customs, an officer leafed through my passport. Welcome back, Mr. Afum, he said. He called me by the part of my last name I rarely use or think about, my father's name. My name is Gene Demby-Afum.
This is going to sound hard to believe. I know. But I hadn't really thought about the connection I had to Accra until that moment. I hadn't seen my father in decades. And I rarely mention him. So cards on the table - I hate talking about my father because of all the ways the story of fatherlessness has become synonymous with black family dysfunction.
And people pose questions to me all the time about what it was like growing up without a father. And they've seen that statistic5 that 72 percent of black children are born out of wedlock6. And they wonder how I fared. So here's what it was like.
My mom worked and fed us and tied my ties. My grandmother watched us after school and picked me up from Cub7 Scouts8. My aunt fussed at me about my grades. And my cousin taught me how to shoot free throws. It never occurred to me that all that fawning9 and all that fussiness10 was family dysfunction.
And so while I was in Ghana, we went to the Elmina Castle, a 500-year-old fortress11 that sits on the Gulf12 of Guinea. For centuries, that castle was a major hub of the trans-Atlantic slave trade. I'd heard stories from other black Americans about how traumatic tours like that could be. And I told myself that I was not about to become some blubbering American cliche13. But I felt a rising disquiet14 as the guy took us to a courtyard, where he said the Portuguese15 governor once lined up the captive African women and would choose one to rape16.
We went through a dark passage to reach the Door of No Return, a glorified17 hole in the castle's stone wall that led countless18 captive Africans to enslavement or death. And then we came to a dungeon19 with no windows. There was this painting of a skull20 above its door. And we stood inside that dungeon in total darkness as our guide asked us to bow our heads.
He recited a prayer for the thousands of people who died on the castle grounds. And I could not hear what he was saying. I was crying. I felt connected not to Ghana at that moment or to the specter of my absent father but to the people who were wrenched21 from that part of the African coast and crammed22 into ships and sold on another continent like livestock23 - those people, who were from far-flung tribes and villages, who arrived in a new land and cobbled together families that slavers and slave masters tried to shatter centuries before anyone uttered the words black family dysfunction. I felt the pull of that shared story, horrifying24 and beautiful, that shaped the lives of millions of Americans, including a black woman, her daughter and me.
MCEVERS: Gene Demby is a correspondent for NPR's Code Switch.
1 browser | |
n.浏览者 | |
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2 gene | |
n.遗传因子,基因 | |
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3 byline | |
n.署名;v.署名 | |
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4 lore | |
n.传说;学问,经验,知识 | |
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5 statistic | |
n.统计量;adj.统计的,统计学的 | |
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6 wedlock | |
n.婚姻,已婚状态 | |
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7 cub | |
n.幼兽,年轻无经验的人 | |
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8 scouts | |
侦察员[机,舰]( scout的名词复数 ); 童子军; 搜索; 童子军成员 | |
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9 fawning | |
adj.乞怜的,奉承的v.(尤指狗等)跳过来往人身上蹭以示亲热( fawn的现在分词 );巴结;讨好 | |
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10 fussiness | |
[医]易激怒 | |
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11 fortress | |
n.堡垒,防御工事 | |
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12 gulf | |
n.海湾;深渊,鸿沟;分歧,隔阂 | |
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13 cliche | |
n./a.陈词滥调(的);老生常谈(的);陈腐的 | |
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14 disquiet | |
n.担心,焦虑 | |
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15 Portuguese | |
n.葡萄牙人;葡萄牙语 | |
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16 rape | |
n.抢夺,掠夺,强奸;vt.掠夺,抢夺,强奸 | |
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17 glorified | |
美其名的,变荣耀的 | |
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18 countless | |
adj.无数的,多得不计其数的 | |
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19 dungeon | |
n.地牢,土牢 | |
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20 skull | |
n.头骨;颅骨 | |
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21 wrenched | |
v.(猛力地)扭( wrench的过去式和过去分词 );扭伤;使感到痛苦;使悲痛 | |
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22 crammed | |
adj.塞满的,挤满的;大口地吃;快速贪婪地吃v.把…塞满;填入;临时抱佛脚( cram的过去式) | |
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23 livestock | |
n.家畜,牲畜 | |
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24 horrifying | |
a.令人震惊的,使人毛骨悚然的 | |
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