美国国家公共电台 NPR Opinion: A Ye Olde Holiday Tale For 2019

 

SCOTT SIMON, HOST:

There are scores of holiday stories on streaming services this season, and a lot of them seem rolled out of the same candy cane¹ factory - snow, smiles and the true meaning of love. As an aficionado² of the form, I've tried to sketch³ out my own version. Cue the music.

(SOUNDBITE OF COUNT BASIE ORCHESTRA SONG, "IT'S THE HOLIDAY SEASON")

SIMON: Charlayne had an exciting life as managing editor of a Manhattan fashion magazine, but something was missing. She was happy with Evelyn, a hedge fund manager to whom she was engaged, but they were always so busy. Charlayne thought a trip back home for the holidays might remind her of what's really important in life.

Charlayne got off the bus in Chestnut⁴ Corners, but the town square was dark. Where was the old drugstore where she and her friends used to get candy, or the gift shop where Mr. Papageorge, with his handlebar mustache, always strung lights in the windows? She stopped a woman on the square to ask, where are all the shops? Shops, said the woman, how 2010. Just click and get it delivered. Charlayne saw a group of youngsters walking along the street and asked, hey, kids, does Fernando's still have the best hot chocolate in town? The boys and girls just kept their heads down, watching chickens wearing pants on TikTok.

Charlayne rounded the corner and saw a curly headed guy with broad shoulders and a shy smile. Silvio? She said, it's me, Charlayne. Remember? The girl next door. You once had a teeny crush on me. The man shook the pods out of his ears and said, I don't remember you at all.

Charlayne went home, where her parents waited, and went to her old room to say hello to her beloved old stuffed animals and American Girl dolls. But her parents had turned her room into an Airbnb rental⁵. A guy named Rex was staying in there.

The family sat down to holiday dinner, but one uncle got angry because they served turkey. Another got mad because there were nightshades. One aunt said impeachment⁶ was a hoax⁷. Another said the whole election was a Russian disinformation operation. Some people said they watched "Watchmen," and some watched "Big Mouth" or "Riverdale." But nobody wants the same thing. And someone finally shouted, oh, go start a hashtag.

Charlayne ran from the house, over the snow and into the car Evelyn had waiting. They kissed. And Charlayne uttered what are sometimes the sweetest words of the season, sure glad that's over.

OK, Hallmark Channel, I'm by the phone.

(SOUNDBITE OF MUSIC)

1 cane   

n.手杖，细长的茎，藤条；v.以杖击，以藤编制的

参考例句：

• This sugar cane is quite a sweet and juicy.这甘蔗既甜又多汁。
• English schoolmasters used to cane the boys as a punishment.英国小学老师过去常用教鞭打男学生作为惩罚。

2 aficionado   

n.…迷；运动迷

参考例句：

• This is good news for postcard aficionado Drene Brennan.这对明信片迷杰纳•布雷南来说是个好消息。
• I'm a real opera aficionado.我是个真正的歌剧迷。

3 sketch   

n.草图；梗概；素描；v.素描；概述

参考例句：

• My sister often goes into the country to sketch. 我姐姐常到乡间去写生。
• I will send you a slight sketch of the house.我将给你寄去房屋的草图。

4 chestnut   

n.栗树，栗子

参考例句：

• We have a chestnut tree in the bottom of our garden.我们的花园尽头有一棵栗树。
• In summer we had tea outdoors,under the chestnut tree.夏天我们在室外栗树下喝茶。

5 rental   

n.租赁，出租，出租业

参考例句：

• The yearly rental of her house is 2400 yuan.她这房子年租金是2400元。
• We can organise car rental from Chicago O'Hare Airport.我们可以安排提供从芝加哥奥黑尔机场出发的租车服务。

6 impeachment   

n.弹劾；控告；怀疑

参考例句：

• Impeachment is considered a drastic measure in the United States.在美国，弹劾被视为一种非常激烈的措施。
• The verdict resulting from his impeachment destroyed his political career.他遭弹劾后得到的判决毁了他的政治生涯。

7 hoax   

v.欺骗，哄骗，愚弄；n.愚弄人，恶作剧

参考例句：

• They were the victims of a cruel hoax.他们是一个残忍恶作剧的受害者。
• They hoax him out of his money.他们骗去他的钱。