美国国家公共电台 NPR 20 Years After 'Speak,' Laurie Halse Anderson Tells Her Own Story In 'Shout'

 

MELISSA BLOCK, HOST:

This is the story of a girl who lost her voice and wrote herself a new one. Those words come from the opening of Laurie Halse Anderson's new memoir¹ titled "Shout." It's the origin story, in a way, of Anderson's groundbreaking novel for young adults titled "Speak," which came out 20 years ago, a novel narrated² by a teenage girl named Melinda who is a survivor³ of sexual assault.

Now in "Shout," Anderson recounts her own experience of being raped⁵ at age 13 and her path toward finding the words to talk and write about it after many years. It's a memoir written in free verse, a collection of short poems. And Laurie Halse Anderson joins me now from our studios at WHYY. Laurie, welcome to the program.

LAURIE HALSE ANDERSON: Oh, thank you so much. Thanks for having me on.

BLOCK: Well, connecting these two books - first, "Speak," and now "Shout" - of course, is the question of language and silence and the power of voice. How long did it take you to tell anybody about your rape⁴?

ANDERSON: I was raped when I was 13. And it took me exactly 23 years. And the person I told first was my therapist, who I had gone to not to talk about what happened to me as a kid, but because I was dealing⁶ - I was very depressed⁷. I was kind of a mess. And I recognized that I was not being a great mom to my children. It's funny how I - it's easier sometimes to get help in order so you can help somebody else.

BLOCK: Yeah.

ANDERSON: It took a couple of months of conversations with my therapist before I felt safe and secure enough with that relationship. And then my life changed the day I opened up and started to speak about what happened.

BLOCK: Talk about Melinda, the character in "Speak." Your poem "How The Story Found Me" describes how she came to you. And you write, she couldn't speak, and she needed an interpreter.

ANDERSON: (Laughter) Yeah. That's when I...

BLOCK: That was you.

ANDERSON: Right. It's funny. For a while in college, I thought I was going to become a translator. And I made some choices that that didn't work out that way. But now I translate. I translate imagination onto the page.

The story kind of has its roots in me as a mother, watching my daughters begin to enter adolescence⁸ and realizing that I had to come to grips with everything. We moved once just before my oldest daughter entered sixth grade. And she was miserable⁹ because we had moved, right? We had ruined her life.

And shortly after that, I had a nightmare that was so realistic, I woke up startled in bed, thinking that my daughter was sobbing¹⁰. But it was actually a nightmare - one of those really vivid ones - just a teenage girl sobbing in my head. And I did a free writing because I couldn't go back to sleep. And what came out of my pen in that free writing later became the opening to "Speak" - a girl who was really, really hurt and couldn't talk about it.

BLOCK: You have talked to many, many teenagers since "Speak" came out. It was hugely successful. And you've traveled to a lot of schools to talk about sexual assault and consent. And you've had so many victims confide¹¹ in you, tell you their stories - weeping on your shoulder sometimes, the way you describe it - which strikes me as being such a gift in a lot of ways, but also must be a really, really heavy burden to bear.

ANDERSON: In the beginning, it surprised me. And what I realized - that it is actually a gift. It's a gift because it shows me that this person trusts me and that I've written or said something that is allowing them to find their voice. And everybody's always hungry for authentic¹² connections with people, right? So I've just been so graced with all these moments of real interaction with people who might be strangers as they walk up to me. But when we're done wiping our eyes and, you know, our noses after the encounter, now they're friends when they walk away. My heart is so full from those wonderful encounters.

BLOCK: We should be clear, of course, that victims of sexual assault are not purely¹³ female. And you've heard from plenty of boys about their own experience with - experiences with sexual assault.

The image that keeps coming back to my mind is when you describe being on the set for the movie version of "Speak," and an electrician - a male electrician - comes and approaches you. You describe him as a big, square guy with a head like a paint can, hands the size of catcher's mitts¹⁴. And he wants to tell you something.

ANDERSON: Oh, that was quite a moment. He very quietly looked at me, and he said, I am Melinda. And I - and he had to say it again because I wasn't sure what he was saying. And he said, a lot of us working on this movie had been through the same thing. And it took my breath away.

And I realized at that point that victims come in every kind of person - not only male or female, but transgender, genderqueer, people who identify outside the binary¹⁵. They're particularly vulnerable, especially in college. If there was a way for every victim of sexual violence to come forward on one day, I think the world would stop spinning for a day.

BLOCK: I'd like to end by having you read one of the poems in your memoir. It's called "Shame Turned Inside Out."

ANDERSON: Oh, this is an angry poem. This is - you asked me earlier about, is it a burden when I hear all of these stories? The other way to look at a burden is that it strengthens you. If you can bear up underneath¹⁶ the weight, it makes you stronger. And this is one of those poems that came out of listening to all those stories.

"Shame Turned Inside Out." (Reading) Sisters of the torn shirts, sisters of the chase around the desk, casting couch, hotel room file cabinet, sisters dragging shattered dreams, bruised¹⁷ hopes, ambitions abandoned in the dirt, sisters fishing one by one in the lake of shame, hooks baited with fear always come back empty. Truth dawns slow when you've been beaten and lied to, but it burns hard and bright once it wakes. Sisters, drop everything. Walk away from the lake. Lean on each other's shoulders when you need the support. Feel the contractions¹⁸ of another truth ready to be born. Shame turned inside out is rage.

BLOCK: And rage, I suppose - a force that can empower, it could also destroy.

ANDERSON: Absolutely. Absolutely. And maybe it's time to destroy a few things.

BLOCK: That's Laurie Halse Anderson. Her memoir is titled "Shout." Thanks very much.

ANDERSON: Thank you.

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1 memoir   

n.[pl.]回忆录，自传；记事录

参考例句：

• He has just published a memoir in honour of his captain.他刚刚出了一本传记来纪念他的队长。
• In her memoir,the actress wrote about the bittersweet memories of her first love.在那个女演员的自传中，她写到了自己苦乐掺半的初恋。

2 narrated   

v.故事( narrate的过去式和过去分词 )

参考例句：

• Some of the story was narrated in the film. 该电影叙述了这个故事的部分情节。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• Defoe skilfully narrated the adventures of Robinson Crusoe on his desert island. 笛福生动地叙述了鲁滨逊·克鲁索在荒岛上的冒险故事。 来自《现代汉英综合大词典》

3 survivor   

n.生存者，残存者，幸存者

参考例句：

• The sole survivor of the crash was an infant.这次撞车的惟一幸存者是一个婴儿。
• There was only one survivor of the plane crash.这次飞机失事中只有一名幸存者。

4 rape   

n.抢夺，掠夺，强奸；vt.掠夺，抢夺，强奸

参考例句：

• The rape of the countryside had a profound ravage on them.对乡村的掠夺给他们造成严重创伤。
• He was brought to court and charged with rape.他被带到法庭并被指控犯有强奸罪。

5 raped   

v.以暴力夺取，强夺( rape的过去式和过去分词 )；强奸

参考例句：

• A young woman was brutally raped in her own home. 一名年轻女子在自己家中惨遭强暴。 来自辞典例句
• We got stick together, or we will be having our women raped. 我们得团结一致，不然我们的妻女就会遭到蹂躏。 来自辞典例句

6 dealing   

n.经商方法，待人态度

参考例句：

• This store has an excellent reputation for fair dealing.该商店因买卖公道而享有极高的声誉。
• His fair dealing earned our confidence.他的诚实的行为获得我们的信任。

7 depressed   

adj.沮丧的，抑郁的，不景气的，萧条的

参考例句：

• When he was depressed,he felt utterly divorced from reality.他心情沮丧时就感到完全脱离了现实。
• His mother was depressed by the sad news.这个坏消息使他的母亲意志消沉。

8 adolescence   

n.青春期，青少年

参考例句：

• Adolescence is the process of going from childhood to maturity.青春期是从少年到成年的过渡期。
• The film is about the trials and tribulations of adolescence.这部电影讲述了青春期的麻烦和苦恼。

9 miserable   

adj.悲惨的，痛苦的；可怜的，糟糕的

参考例句：

• It was miserable of you to make fun of him.你取笑他，这是可耻的。
• Her past life was miserable.她过去的生活很苦。

10 sobbing   

<主方>Ⅰ adj.湿透的

参考例句：

• I heard a child sobbing loudly. 我听见有个孩子在呜呜地哭。
• Her eyes were red with recent sobbing. 她的眼睛因刚哭过而发红。

11 confide   

v.向某人吐露秘密

参考例句：

• I would never readily confide in anybody.我从不轻易向人吐露秘密。
• He is going to confide the secrets of his heart to us.他将向我们吐露他心里的秘密。

12 authentic   

a.真的，真正的；可靠的，可信的，有根据的

参考例句：

• This is an authentic news report. We can depend on it. 这是篇可靠的新闻报道, 我们相信它。
• Autumn is also the authentic season of renewal. 秋天才是真正的除旧布新的季节。

13 purely   

adv.纯粹地，完全地

参考例句：

• I helped him purely and simply out of friendship.我帮他纯粹是出于友情。
• This disproves the theory that children are purely imitative.这证明认为儿童只会单纯地模仿的理论是站不住脚的。

14 mitts   

n.露指手套，棒球手套，拳击手套( mitt的名词复数 )

参考例句：

• I'd love to get my mitts on one of those. 我很想得到一个那样的东西。
• Those are my cigarettes; get your mitts off them. 那是我的香烟，别动它。 来自《现代英汉综合大词典》

15 binary   

adj.二，双；二进制的；n.双(体)；联星

参考例句：

• Computers operate using binary numbers.计算机运行运用二进位制。
• Let us try converting the number itself to binary.我们试一试，把这个数本身变成二进制数。

16 underneath   

adj.在...下面，在...底下；adv.在下面

参考例句：

• Working underneath the car is always a messy job.在汽车底下工作是件脏活。
• She wore a coat with a dress underneath.她穿着一件大衣，里面套着一条连衣裙。

17 bruised   

[医]青肿的，瘀紫的

参考例句：

• his bruised and bloodied nose 他沾满血的青肿的鼻子
• She had slipped and badly bruised her face. 她滑了一跤，摔得鼻青脸肿。

18 contractions   

n.收缩( contraction的名词复数 )；缩减；缩略词；（分娩时）子宫收缩

参考例句：

• Contractions are much more common in speech than in writing. 缩略词在口语里比在书写中常见得多。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• Muscle contractions are powered by the chemical adenosine triphosphate(ATP ). 肌肉收缩是由化学物质三磷酸腺苷(ATP)提供动力的。 来自辞典例句