教你如何正确地请教他人

 　　What would you do if you had a tricky¹ problem at work? Or if while studying you came across a sentence in your notes you couldn’t quite understand? Or if you are simply lost in a new city?

　　在工作中遇到了棘手的问题，你会怎么办？做功课看笔记时遇到不明白的句子，你又会怎么做？或者仅仅是在某个陌生的城市迷了路，你要怎么做？

　　When you are stuck in life there are many ways to move forward. You could spend time and effort brainstorming² to find the answers yourself. You could go to the library to peruse³ books. Or, you could consult Google or other Web-based resources.

　　这时候，有许多方法可供选择，比如：自己花时间和精力，通过 “头脑风暴”找到答案；或者去图书馆翻翻书；也可以去问问谷歌或者借助其他互联网资源找到解决之道。

　　But there is one thing many of us avoid – asking for advice. There are many reasons for this reluctance⁴. For one, we do not want to bother others. They must be busy and have their own problems to solve.

　　但是，有种方法却总被我们忽视——请教他人。我们不愿开口的原因有很多，比如不愿打扰他人，因为我们知道每个人都很忙，都有自己的问题需要解决。

　　教你如何正确地请教他人

　　However, recent research has shown fears about appearing incompetent⁵ by asking advice are totally misplaced. Far from inconveniencing or annoying the advice-giver, asking for advice may make others think you are smarter.

　　不过，最近的研究发现，人们其实完全不必担心请教他人会让自己显得无能。向他人请教问题不仅不会带来不便或是让被问者感到厌烦，反而会让你在别人眼中更聪明。

　　Harvard behavioral science professors Alison Wood Brooks⁶ and Francesca Gino, along with University of Pennsylvania business professor Maurice Schweitzer, discovered this phenomenon through a series of experiments conducted over the past few years. Their studies were recently published in Scientific American.

　　哈佛大学行为学教授埃尔森?伍德?布鲁克和弗兰斯克?吉诺，以及宾夕法尼亚大学的商学院教授马利斯?施韦泽经过几年的实验，共同发现了上述结论。最近，他们的科研成果发表登上了《科学美国人》杂志。

　　These researchers discovered that asking for advice is in fact a form of flattery. And in general, flattery reflects positively⁷ on the flatterer, even if the fawning⁸ is insincere.

　　他们发现：请教他人其实是一种恭维。而通常情况下，恭维对于恭维者有益无害，哪怕他的恭维毫无真心可言。

　　Ego⁹ booster

　　自尊心大增

　　According to researchers, by asking someone to share his or her wisdom, a person can boost the adviser’s ego.

　　研究同时发现：请求别人分享智慧，能让被请教之人自尊心大增。

　　But the power of advice-seeking has limits: You can’t boost someone’s ego if you ask something he or she has little knowledge about.

　　但是，这并非总是奏效：比如被问之人对你所问的知识领域知之甚少。

　　In one experiment, the researchers asked people to identify areas of personal strength and weakness, such as their knowledge of sports, musical instruments or geography. Next, someone approached them for advice in their area of self-identified weakness. The non-experts were perplexed¹⁰ by these questions and viewed the asker as less competent for seeking their help.

　　在一次实验中，研究人员首先让参与者说明自己在体育、乐器、地理等各个领域的强项和弱项。然后，让别人去向他们请教自己的弱项，他们于是也被问题纠结，觉得向他们寻求帮助的人能力不足。

　　What are the implications of these findings? For those in need of guidance, says an article in The Atlantic, the good news is that asking an expert for advice can only help. The bad news is that this does not mean humans are “a bunch of altruistic¹¹ saints” who will help whomever they can. We tend to like people who (at least pretend to) respect us. “It’s more evidence that, at least in the business world, flattery will get you everywhere,” says the article.

　　这些发现说明了什么？《大西洋月刊》的一篇文章这样写到：对于那些需要帮助的人而言，（研究发现）好消息就是只要问对专家就能找到答案，不幸的是并非人人都是“无私的圣人”、愿意对任何人伸出援手。我们喜欢对我们表示尊重的人（哪怕是装出来的）。尤其在商业领域，奉承更是屡试不爽。

　　So, to the millions of graduating college students who are looking for jobs now, apart from dressing¹² appropriately and behaving with good manners, try to ask the interviewers some advice about the field or industry you are going to work in, as this will surely help you leave a good impression.

　　因此，对于数百万正在找工作的大学毕业生而言，除了穿着得体、举止有礼，在面试时向面试官请教一些未来工作领域或行业方面的问题也会让你留下更好的印象。

1 tricky   

adj.狡猾的，奸诈的；(工作等)棘手的，微妙的

参考例句：

• I'm in a rather tricky position.Can you help me out?我的处境很棘手，你能帮我吗？
• He avoided this tricky question and talked in generalities.他回避了这个非常微妙的问题，只做了个笼统的表述。

2 brainstorming   

献计献策,合力攻关

参考例句：

• With Brainstorming, treat the view on how to solve the problem rightly. 利用脑激励法(Brainstorming)，正确对待学生实验中的问题解决观。
• We are going to do some brainstorming soon. 我们很快就要做些脑力激荡。

3 peruse   

v.细读，精读

参考例句：

• We perused the company's financial statements for the past five years.我们翻阅了公司过去5年来的财务报表。
• Please peruse this report at your leisure.请在空暇时细读这篇报道。

4 reluctance   

n.厌恶，讨厌，勉强，不情愿

参考例句：

• The police released Andrew with reluctance.警方勉强把安德鲁放走了。
• He showed the greatest reluctance to make a reply.他表示很不愿意答复。

5 incompetent   

adj.无能力的，不能胜任的

参考例句：

• He is utterly incompetent at his job.他完全不能胜任他的工作。
• He is incompetent at working with his hands.他动手能力不行。

6 brooks   

n.小溪( brook的名词复数 )

参考例句：

• Brooks gave the business when Haas caught him with his watch. 哈斯抓到偷他的手表的布鲁克斯时，狠狠地揍了他一顿。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• Ade and Brooks exchanged blows yesterday and they were severely punished today. 艾德和布鲁克斯昨天打起来了，今天他们受到严厉的惩罚。 来自《简明英汉词典》

7 positively   

adv.明确地，断然，坚决地；实在，确实

参考例句：

• She was positively glowing with happiness.她满脸幸福。
• The weather was positively poisonous.这天气着实讨厌。

8 fawning   

adj.乞怜的，奉承的v.（尤指狗等）跳过来往人身上蹭以示亲热( fawn的现在分词 )；巴结；讨好

参考例句：

• The servant worn a fawning smile. 仆人的脸上露出一种谄笑。 来自《现代汉英综合大词典》
• Then, what submission, what cringing and fawning, what servility, what abject humiliation! 好一个低眉垂首、阿谀逢迎、胁肩谄笑、卑躬屈膝的场面！ 来自英汉文学 - 双城记

9 ego   

n.自我，自己，自尊

参考例句：

• He is absolute ego in all thing.在所有的事情上他都绝对自我。
• She has been on an ego trip since she sang on television.她上电视台唱过歌之后就一直自吹自擂。

10 perplexed   

adj.不知所措的

参考例句：

• The farmer felt the cow,went away,returned,sorely perplexed,always afraid of being cheated.那农民摸摸那头牛，走了又回来，犹豫不决，总怕上当受骗。
• The child was perplexed by the intricate plot of the story.这孩子被那头绪纷繁的故事弄得迷惑不解。

11 altruistic   

adj.无私的，为他人着想的

参考例句：

• It is superficial to be altruistic without feeling compassion.无慈悲之心却说利他，是为表面。
• Altruistic spirit should be cultivated by us vigorously.利他的精神是我们应该努力培养的。

12 dressing   

n.(食物)调料；包扎伤口的用品，敷料

参考例句：

• Don't spend such a lot of time in dressing yourself.别花那么多时间来打扮自己。
• The children enjoy dressing up in mother's old clothes.孩子们喜欢穿上妈妈旧时的衣服玩。