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Our history and our culture have come about because a lot of ordinary people have done some really terrible jobs. And our traditional Christmas is no exception. However dreadful it's been, having to do all that shopping, however ghastly been, stuck with your in-laws and your relatives' children. You can put your feet up, and gloat. 'Cause there is loads of people who've had far worse Christmases than you will ever have. Stand by to find out.
About the gross inside job behind the Christmas roast.
(Disgusting, it's strangely interesting.)
How slimy seaweed made Jane Austin's table festive and why panto relied on dangerous chemistry.
Welcome to the Worst Christmas Jobs in History.
This could be the worst Christmas job. Shepherds are biding in their fields, watching their flocks by night, when, lo, an angel appears, and they'll go off and see the baby Jesus. It is the most famous part of the Christmas Nativity story. But funny enough, it proves that Christmas didn't happen in December, because December is the rainy month in Judea, and all the flocks are taken in for the night. So, if the shepherds were good Jewish boys, they would've all been tucked up sleeping in bed, listening to the Romans celebrating their midwinter feast.
The Roman feast of Saturnalia lasted from the middle to the end of December. They gave each other presents, they stuffed down food, they drank till they were sick, and they nursed monumental hangovers. Saturnalia was so popular that when Christians tried to get people celebrating Jesus's birth in March or April, it never caught on. That's why they tag their religious feast onto this older pagan boozer.
So, next time when you are feasting at a Christmas party, when someone starts bleating on about this not being the real spirit of Christmas, tell them they are wrong. Shoveling down food or guzzling booze is the original spirit of Christmas.
"This one for me?"
"Yes."
"Cheers."
"Was it the Romans who actually invented binge drinking then?"
"They drink an awful lot at the Saturnalia. It's the time they're very luxurious. They eat a lot and then they drink a lot. But also in the first century A.D, they developed drinking on empty stomach for the first time."
"Could they hold the liquor?"
"No, and we have plenty of, plenty of information about people being sick, people throwing wine cups at parties and also, in wall painting, we find images of people throwing up, ur, aided by slaves often."
And it's throwing up the central to our first worst job, which used to take place in the Roman dining-room. And by an eerie coincidence we actually happen to have a Roman dinning-room right next door. Welcome to the world of the Puke Collector. Come with me.
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ghastly adv.可怖地
bide v. 居住，滞留
Nativity n. (the Nativity) 基督降生
boozer n. 酒店
booze n. 酒，酒宴
guzzle v. 狂饮，暴食，喝酒花掉（钱）
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