-Old Lady: Howard, it's the phone!

　　Howard 是电话在响!

　　-Howard: I know it's the phone, Ma, I hear the phone!

　　我是电话在响,妈, 我听到它在响!

　　-Old Lady: Well, who's calling at this ungodly hour?!

　　谁有病在这个时候打来?!

　　-Howard: I don't know!

　　我怎么知道!

　　-Old Lady: Well, ask them why they're calling at this ungodly hour!

　　那就快接问问为什么这时候打!

　　-Howard: How can I ask them when I'm talking to you?!

　　我在跟你说话，你让我怎么接啊?!

　　Hello.

　　你好

　　-Leonard: Howard, it's Leonard. Code milky green.

　　Howard，我是Leonard。代号奶绿

　　-Howard: Dear Lord, not milky green.

　　神阿，不是吧，奶绿?

　　-Leonard: Affirmative. With fever.

　　已经确认了，还发烧。

　　-Old Lady: Who's on the phone?!

　　谁打来的?!

　　-Howard: It's Leonard!

　　是Leonard!

　　-Old Lady: Why is he calling?!

　　有什么事?!

　　-Howard: Sheldon's sick!

　　Sheldon病了!

　　-Old Lady: Were you playing with him?!

　　你和他一起玩过吗?!

　　-Howard: For God's sake, Ma, I'm 26 years old!

　　看在上帝的份上我已经26岁了妈!

　　-Old Lady: Excuse me, Mr. Grownup!

　　不好意思 "成熟"先生!

　　-Old Lady: What do you want for breakfast?!

　　你早饭要来点什么?!

　　-Howard: Chocolate milk and Eggs, please!

　　巧克力牛奶和鸡蛋!

　　-Leonard: Howard, listen to me.

　　Howard听说我。

　　-Howard: Hang on. Call waiting.

　　等下，又有人打来了。

　　-Leonard: No, don't, don't...!

　　不别别接...!

　　-Howard: Hello.

　　你好

　　-Sheldon: Howard, I'm sick.

　　Howard我病了

　　-Howard: Howard's sleeping. This is his mother!

　　Howard在睡觉我是他妈妈!

　　Why are you calling at this ungodly hour?

　　你怎么在这么不合适的时间打来?

　　-Sheldon: I need soup.

　　我要喝汤。

　　-Howard: Then call your own mother!

　　那你该打给你妈妈!

　　It was Sheldon.

　　是Sheldon。

　　-Leonard: I tried to stop you.

　　我让你别接了。

　　-Howard: It's my own fault.

　　是我的错。

　　I forgot the protocol we put in place after The Great Ear Infection of '06.

　　我忘了我们在06年"大耳朵感染"后的协议了。

　　-Leonard: You call Koothrappali.

　　你快打给Koothrappali。

　　We need to find a place to lay low for the next 18 to 24 hours.

　　我们得找个地方躲上个18-24小时。

　　-Howard: Stand by.

　　等下，别挂。

　　-Howard: Ma, can my friends come over?

　　妈，我朋友可以过来住吗?

　　-Old Lady: I just had the carpet steamed!

　　我刚熨过地毯!

　　-Howard: That's a negatory.

　　此路不通。

　　But there's a Planet of The Apes marathon at the NuArt today.

　　不过今天NuArt剧院有连播"决战星球"

　　-Leonard: Five movies, two hours apiece....it's a start.

　　一共5部 2小时一部....噩梦才刚开始呢。

　　-Woman: Homeless, crazy guy at table 18.

　　18桌有个无家可归的疯子。

　　-Penny: No, just crazy.

　　不,只是疯子罢了.

　　Sheldon, what are you doing here?

　　Sheldon，你在这干什么？

　　-Sheldon: I'm sick. Thank you very much.

　　我病了，托你的福。

　　-Penny: How could you have gotten if from me?

　　怎么会是我传染的呢?

　　I'm not sick.

　　我又没病。

　　-Sheldon: You're a carrier.

　　但你是病毒携带者。

　　All these people here are doomed.

　　这里所有人的都会被传染的。

　　You're doomed!

　　你们完了!

　　-Penny: Sheldon, what do you want?

　　Sheldon 你想点些什么?

　　-Sheldon: I want soup.

　　我要喝汤。

　　-Penny: Why didn't you...?

　　那你为什么不...?

　　Why didn't you just have soup at home?

　　那你为什么不在家里喝?

　　-Sheldon: Penny, I have an IQ of 187.

　　Penny 我智商187。

　　Don't you imagine that if there were a way for me to have had soup at home, I would have thought of it?

　　如果我家里有汤喝，我会没想到吗?

　　-Penny: You can have soup delivered.

　　我们可以叫外卖的。

　　-Sheldon: I did not think of that.

　　这我倒没想到。

　　Clearly, febrile delirium is setting in.

　　显然，高烧已经让我开始神志不清了。

　　Please bring me some soup while I still understand what a spoon is for.

　　在我还记得怎么用汤勺前，给我来份汤。

　　-Penny: Okay, what kind of soup do you want?

　　好吧你要喝什么汤?

　　-Sheldon: Well, my mother used to make me this split pea with little frankfurter slices and these homemade croutons.

　　我妈妈以前经常给我做豌豆汤加点法兰克香肠和自制的烤面包片。

　　-Penny: We have chicken, tortilla and potato leek.

　　我们只有鸡汤，玉米汤和罗宋汤。

　　-Sheldon: Could I get any of those with little frankfurter slices and homemade croutons?

　　那我能不能在里面加点法兰克香肠和自制面包片?

　　-Penny: No.

　　不行。

　　-Sheldon: Then surprise me.

　　那随便吧。

　　Would you call that "moss green" or "forest green"?

　　你们觉得这是"苔绿"还是"森林绿"?

　　-Leonard: Look at this.

　　看哪。

　　Everyone went chimp.

　　每个人都扮黑猩猩。

　　-Rajesh: I'd like to point out that I voted for orangutan, but you shouted me down.

　　我就说我们应该扮类人猿的，你死活不让。

　　-Leonard: Oh, hi, Penny.

　　嘿，Penny。

　　-Penny: Hey, where are you?

　　嘿，你在哪里?

　　-Leonard: I'm, uh, at work.

　　我... 在工作。

　　-Penny: You sound funny.

　　你声音听起来很奇怪。

　　-Leonard: Look. I'm, uh, in a radiation suit.

　　我...我穿着防辐射服呢。

　　What's up?

　　有什么事吗?

　　-Penny: Yeah, I'm at work, too, and you'll never guess who's here infecting my entire station.

　　我也在工作呢，你不会猜到谁在这里把病菌传给这所有的客人。

　　-Leonard: Sheldon's at the Cheesecake Factory.

　　Sheldon 在"奶酪蛋糕餐厅"。

　　Just tell him to go home.

　　快让他回家吧。

　　-Penny: He won't leave.

　　他不会走的。

　　He says he's afraid he'll pass out on the bus, and someone will harvest his organs.

　　他说他怕昏倒在公车上，有人会偷他的器官。

　　-Leonard: He's panicked, and he's established a nest.

　　他有妄想症，他把巢都筑好了。

　　-Penny: Can you please come get him?

　　你能不能来把他带走?

　　-Leonard: Uh, yeah, I'd be, I'd be happy to, Penny.

　　好的，行，我很乐意 Penny。

　　Oh, my God, there's a breach in the radiation unit!

　　天哪，辐射单位有个裂口!

　　The whole city is in jeopardy!

　　整个城市都很危险!

　　Oh, my God!

　　天啊!

　　The containment vessel's melting. Gotta go. Bye!

　　核反应堆安全壳快融化了，我得挂了，拜!

　　I feel really guilty.

　　我真感到内疚。

　　-Howard: You did what you had to do.

　　但你不得不这么做。

　　Take your stinking paws off my popcorn, you damn dirty ape!

　　把你的爪子从我的爆米花上挪开，你这臭猿人!

　　-Sheldon: Thanks for bringing me home.

　　谢谢你送我回家。

　　-Penny: That's okay.

　　不客气。

　　I didn't really need to work today.

　　我今天也不怎么想工作。

　　It's not like I have rent or car payments or anything.

　　我又不急着付房租或还车贷什么的。

　　-Sheldon: Good, good.

　　好，很好。

　　Okay, well, you feel better.

　　好了祝你早日康复

　　-Sheldon: Wait.

　　等等

　　Where are you going?

　　你要上哪?

　　-Penny: Um... home...to write some bad checks.

　　回家...去写几张空头支票

　　-Sheldon: You're going to leave me?

　　你要我把一个人留在这?

　　-Penny: Hey, Sheldon, you are a grown man.

　　嘿 Sheldon 你是个大人了。

　　Haven't you ever been sick before?

　　你就没生过病?

　　-Sheldon: Of course, but not by myself.

　　当然有，但从没有一个人待着。

　　-Penny: Really? Never?

　　是吗? 从没有?

　　-Sheldon: Well, once, when I was 15 and spending the summer at the Heidelberg Institute in Germany.

　　好吧，就一次，我15岁的时候，那是我在德国海德尔学院过暑假。

　　-Penny: Studying abroad?

　　去留学?

　　-Sheldon: No. Visiting professor.

　　不，访问教授。

　　Anyway, the local cuisine was a little more sausage-based than I'm used to,

　　总之，那里所有吃的都有香肠，让我很不习惯，

　　And the result was an internal Blitzkrieg, with my lower intestine playing the part of Czechoslovakia.

　　结果在就好像它在我肚子里搞了个闪电战,而我的肠子扮演了捷克斯洛伐克。

　　-Penny: And there was no one there to take care of you?

　　当时没人照顾你吗？

　　-Sheldon: No. My mom had to fly back to Texas to help my dad, because the house had slipped off the cinder blocks again.

　　没有我妈妈飞回德州去帮我爸爸，因为我那煤屑砖砌的房子又塌了。

　　-Penny: Again?

　　又?

　　-Sheldon: It was tornado season.

　　当时刮龙卷风。

　　And it was an aluminum house.

　　那房子是铝做的。

　　Anyway, the housekeeper in the faculty residence didn't speak any English. and when I finally managed to convince her I was sick,

　　总之，那的宿舍管理员不会说英语，当我终于让她明白我病了，

　　She said, "Mochtest du eine Darmspfilung?"

　　她对我说了句 Mochtest du eine Darmspfilung?

　　-Penny: What does that mean?

　　什么意思?

　　-Sheldon: Based on what happened next ,I assume it means, Would you like an enema?

　　就当时的情形，我猜应该是你需要灌肠吗?

　　-Penny: Okay, sweetie. I'll take care of you.

　　亲爱的，我会照顾你的。

　　What do you need?

　　我能做些什么?

　　-Sheldon: Well, my mom used to give me sponge baths.

　　我妈通常用海绵帮我洗个澡。

　　-Penny: Okay, ground rules: no baths, and definitely no enemas.

　　好吧，定好规矩，不洗澡。当然，也不灌肠。

　　-Sheldon: Agreed.

　　同意。

　　ungodly：无良心的

　　protocol：协议

　　doomed：命定的

　　febrile delirium：发热谵妄

　　split：干裂的

　　crouton：油煎的面包丁

　　tortilla：薄而圆的玉蜀黍饼

　　leek：韭葱

　　orangutan：猩猩

　　pass out:[俚]晕倒

　　breach：裂口

　　containment vessel：安全壳

　　stinking：发臭的

　　popcorn：爆米花

　　sausage：香肠

　　cinder block：煤渣砌块

　　sponge bath：海绵搽洗浴