Hey, I did not settle for Leonard.

　　他显然不像我通常约会的类型

　　I mean, obviously, he isn't the kind of guy I usually go out with...

　　体格上不像

　　you know, physically.

　　再说一次  我在呢

　　Again, I'm right here.

　　我的意思是  我不会以封面断定书的好坏

　　My point is, I do not judge a book by its cover.

　　我更在意人的内心

　　I am interested in the person underneath.

　　我在这吧  你看得见我

　　I am here, right? You see me.

　　我也在意人的内心啊

　　Hey, I'm interested in what's inside people, too,

　　但是希望内心外面包装点像

　　but why is it wrong to want those insides wrapped up in,

　　哈莉?贝瑞（肤色黑）的巧克力不对吗

　　say, the delicious caramel that is Halle Berry?

　　对  你也是巧克力装

　　Yes, you're delicious caramel, too.

　　行  我告诉为什么不对

　　All right, you know what, I will tell you

　　抱歉  我能插下话吗

　　why it's wrong... Excuse me, may I interject?

　　干嘛

　　What?

　　从生物学角度上说

　　Biologically speaking,

　　霍华德想找最佳伴侣繁殖后代

　　Howard is perfectly justified in seeking out the optimum mate

　　完全合情合理

　　for the propagation of his genetic line.

　　-谢谢  谢尔顿  -不过

　　- Thank you, Sheldon. - Now, whether that

　　但这种繁殖如果站在人类进化的角度来看

　　propagation is in the interest of humanity is, of course,

　　又是完全不同的问题

　　an entirely different question.

　　我是艾拉?弗莱托

　　This is Ira Flatow and you're listening

　　您正在收听的是公共广播电台的周五科学

　　to NPR's Science Friday.

　　今晚跟我们电话连线的是

　　Joining us today by phone

　　在加州帕萨迪纳办公室里的

　　from his office in Pasadena, California

　　谢尔顿?库珀博士

　　is Dr. Sheldon Cooper.

　　这个肯定很好玩

　　Oh, this is going to be a riot.

　　欢迎参加我们的节目  库珀博士

　　Thanks for being with us today, Dr. Cooper.

　　我很荣幸  艾拉

　　My pleasure, Ira.

　　我们讨论一下磁单极子吧

　　Now, let's talk about magnetic monopoles.

　　你能给听众解释一下什么是磁单极子吗

　　Can you explain to our audience just what a monopole is?

　　当然可以

　　Of course.

　　首先  一块普通的磁铁

　　First, consider an ordinary magnet which has,

　　即使教育程度再低的听众

　　as even the most uneducated

　　都应该知道  有两个磁极

　　in your audience must know, two poles.

　　南极和北极

　　A north and south pole.

　　把磁铁切成两半  则变成较小的两块磁铁

　　If you cut that in half, you have two smaller magnets,

　　每块都有南北两极

　　each with its own north and south pole.

　　库珀博士  我们的连线

　　Uh, Dr. Cooper, I think there might be

　　可能出了点问题

　　something wrong with our connection.

　　不  我听得很清楚

　　No, I hear you fine.

　　正如我刚刚说的  普通磁铁有两个磁极

　　As I was saying, an ordinary magnet has two poles.

　　磁单极子的主要特征是

　　The primary characteristic of a monopole

　　它只有一个磁极  因此称为磁单极子

　　is that it has only one pole, hence, monopole.

　　弦理论  或者说M理论

　　A requirement for string theory,

　　的一个必要条件

　　or M-theory, if you will,

　　是存在磁单极子

　　is the existence of such monopoles.

　　我本人曾带领一个考察队

　　I, myself, led an expedition

　　前往北极圈探寻这种粒子

　　to the Arctic Circle in search of said particles.

　　克瑞普克  我看到喷嘴了  你死定了

　　Kripke, I found the nozzle! I'm going to kill you!

　　真高兴你今晚能和我共浴

　　So nice you could join me this evening.

　　你跟往常一样漂亮

　　You're looking lovely as always.

　　过奖  霍华德

　　Thanks, Howard.

　　一向乐意加入你的手淫幻想

　　Always nice to be part of your masturbatory fantasies.

　　别这样嘛  凯蒂

　　Come on, Katee.

　　何必说得这么低俗呢

　　Don't make it sound so cheap.

　　抱歉  在浴缸里自欺欺人

　　I'm sorry, fiddling with yourself in the bathtub

　　确实是出类拔萃的行为

　　is a real class act.

　　谢谢

　　Thank you.

　　我们可以开始了吗

　　So, shall we get started?

　　当然

　　Sure.

　　但我能先问你个问题吗

　　But can I ask you a question first?

　　你想扮演赛昂人和殖民者吗

　　Do you want to play Cylon and colonist?

　　不

　　No.

　　我很奇怪  你明明可以和真人约会

　　I want to know why you're playing make-believe with me

　　却在这里和我玩性幻想游戏

　　when you could be out with a real woman tonight.

　　你是指伯纳黛特吗

　　You mean, Bernadette?

　　不  我是指莱娅公主(星战人物  路克?天行者的双胞胎妹妹)

　　No, I mean Princess Leia.

　　我当然指的是伯纳黛特

　　Of course I mean Bernadette.

　　她是个很好的女孩儿  真的喜欢你

　　She's a wonderful girl and she really likes you.

　　我知道  但她不是你

　　I know, but she's not you.

　　我又不是真实的

　　I'm not me.

　　真正的我现正在比弗利山庄

　　The real me is in Beverly Hills

　　和某个英俊高大的有钱人约会呢

　　Going out with a tall, handsome, rich guy.

　　真的吗  很高大吗

　　Really? Tall?

　　-一米九三呢  -哇哦

　　- Six-four. - Ouch.

　　问题在于  你遇到了一个好女孩

　　The point is, you've got a wonderful girl in your life,

　　但却宁愿整晚在浴缸里对着虚拟影像

　　And you're ignoring her in order to spend your nights

　　和浴巾性幻想  也不去理她

　　in the bathtub with a mental image and a wash cloth.

　　霍华德

　　Howard!

　　你到底在里面干嘛

　　What are you doing in there?

　　我在洗澡

　　I'm taking a bath!

　　你可别做啥其他猥琐的事

　　I hope that's all you're doing!

　　那浴缸我也要用

　　We share that tub!

　　别提醒我

　　Don't remind me!

　　老天

　　Oh, man.

　　都是泡泡  没有我子孙的容身之地了

　　All soaped up and no place to go.

　　哥们儿  你还好吧

　　How ya doin', buddy?

　　我在国家电台上被当众羞辱

　　I was humiliated on national radio.

　　能好受才怪

　　How do you think I'm doing?

　　拜托  没这么夸张吧

　　Come on, it wasn't that bad.

　　你们来干嘛

　　What do you want?

　　(绿野仙踪中的麦琪肯人欢迎多萝西)

　　(munchkin voice): We represent the Lollipop Guild,

　　我们是棒棒糖团队  欢迎你的到来

　　and we want you.

　　好啊  克瑞普克捉弄了你一下

　　Okay, so Kripke played a joke on you.

　　不好笑

　　It wasn't funny.

　　-我觉得很好笑  -拉杰

　　- I thought it was funny. - Raj.

　　你也笑了啊

　　You laughed.

　　你笑了吗

　　Did you laugh?

　　我笑得滚到地板上了

　　I fell on the floor.

　　好吧  这次是他赢了

　　All right, he got you.

　　你可以以牙还牙嘛

　　You can get him back.

　　我才不要堕落到他那种水准

　　I refuse to sink to his level.

　　你落不了  体内充满了氦气

　　You can't sink. With all that helium in you,

　　遇水不飘走就算你走运啦

　　you're lucky you don't float away.

　　你当真认栽了吗

　　Are you really admitting defeat?

　　我从不认栽

　　I never admit defeat.

　　很好

　　Good.

　　但是  从另一个方面讲

　　However, on an unrelated topic,

　　我再也抬不起头做人了

　　I am never getting out of this bed again.

　　那何不这样  你设法捉弄克瑞普克

　　What if you could make Kripke

　　让他看起来比你更蠢

　　look even sillier than he made you look?

　　我觉得这不可能  老兄

　　I don't think that's possible, dude.

　　你尽说些丧气话

　　You're not helping.

　　我本就不是来说好话  我是来吐糟的

　　I didn't come to help, I came to mock.

　　谢尔顿  你现在得好好想想

　　Sheldon, what you need to do is figure out a way

　　到底怎么报复克瑞普克

　　to exact vengeance on Kripke, like, uh,

　　好比蝙蝠侠把疯子罪犯小丑扔进了

　　like, how the Joker got back at Batman for putting him

　　亚克汗疯人院  事后他不是越狱了吗

　　in the Arkham Asylum for the Criminally Insane.

　　是啊  他不光是待在里面对其他

　　That's true. He didn't just stay there and talk about

　　精神病恶棍大吐苦水

　　His feelings with the other psychotic villains.

　　还越狱了  还对哥谭市的供水系统投毒

　　He, he broke out and poisoned Gotham's water supply.