麦克斯 是我

　　I know it's you.

　　我知道是你

　　You sleep with a knife under your pillow?

　　你睡觉时 枕头底下还藏把刀啊

　　It's the only home security system I can afford.

　　这是我唯一付得起的家庭安保项目

　　And I'm a cutter.

　　而且 割腕儿童欢乐多嘛

　　I can't sleep on that couch.

　　那沙发我睡不了

　　I think Ikea might be the Scandinavian word for sciatica.

　　我想 "宜家"是脊椎"移架"的意思吧

　　And there's weird sounds in the street.

　　而且大街上有奇怪的声音

　　And I don't have my white noise machine.

　　我也没带助眠白噪音机

　　Well that's Puerto Rican noise.

　　只是波多黎各街头艺人在瞎吹奏嘛

　　You'll get used to it.

　　你听听就会习惯

　　Can I just lay down here and get a little sleep?

　　我能躺在这睡一会儿吗

　　I don't even let the men I sleep with sleep with me.

　　我的男人都不准在这睡

　　I can't get into your issues right now.

　　你的心里毛病我现在没力医

　　I just need to sleep!

　　我只是想睡觉

　　Fine get in then.

　　好吧 钻进来吧

　　What is that?

　　这是什么

　　Potato chips. I sleep eat.

　　薯片 我边睡边吃

　　Cool ranch and bacon?

　　清凉牧场培根味

　　Dude they're delicious.

　　拜托 好吃到做梦也会笑

　　Because of your breakup with Robbie?

　　跟人分手就得自暴自弃吗

　　Just get in.

　　少废话快上来

　　I have to be in the city to babysit in five hours.

　　我五个小时后得去市里给人看孩子呢

　　Oh great you're like a nightlight.

　　天啊 你就像盏灯

　　You're so blonde.

　　金发亮得真晃眼

　　Thank you.

　　多谢夸奖

　　Max someone's in the living room.

　　麦克斯 有人进了客厅

　　Max someone's in the bedroom!

　　麦克斯 有人进了卧室

　　劈腿男友归来

　　Robbie!

　　罗比

　　What's up babe?

　　怎么了 宝贝

　　Robbie what are you doing here?

　　罗比 你来这儿干嘛

　　We broke up.

　　我们已经分手了

　　Still?

　　还分着啊

　　Yes still. You hit on me.

　　没错 还分着 你调戏我

　　And then she caught you with someone else

　　然后她还发现你和别人

　　in these very sheets.

　　在这张床上滚床单

　　Which I'm hoping she washed.

　　希望你洗过这床单了

　　Oh I get it.

　　我懂了

　　You blew me off 'cause you like the ladies.

　　你跟我分手是因为你喜欢女人

　　Which is cool. I like the ladies too.

　　没关系 我也喜欢女人

　　And right now it's the two ladies I like.

　　而现在 床上的两个女人我都喜欢

　　Robbie if I were gonna go lesbian

　　罗比 如果我要玩百合情

　　she would be the last "les" I'd "bian."

　　她是我最不可能"合"的那位

　　Listen babe

　　听我说 宝贝

　　You really hurt her.

　　你伤她很深

　　Stop.

　　闭嘴

　　She sleep eats trans fats thanks to you.

　　都是你 弄的她边睡边吃垃圾食品

　　Here stuff all of these in your mouth.

　　给 把这些都塞进你嘴巴里

　　Got it your thing. I'll be quiet.

　　收到 你的事 我闭嘴就是了

　　Robbie this isn't cool at all.

　　罗比 这样是不对的

　　Showing up here after what you did?

　　你都做出那种事了 怎么还有脸回来

　　You go girl.

　　说得好 姐妹

　　I have something to say to you and you had better listen.

　　我说的话你最好给我听清楚

　　What are you the relationship ghost?

　　你这算什么 恋情背后灵吗

　　Robbie just go!

　　罗比 你走吧

　　I can't say what I need to in front of the relationship ghost.

　　在恋情背后灵面前 事请不好谈

　　I'll call you to come get your stuff

　　我会打电话叫你来拿东西

　　and we can talk then.

　　到时候再谈吧

　　Leave the key.

　　把钥匙留下

　　Straight up Max you're breaking my heart.

　　坦白说 麦克斯 你伤了我的心

　　You're the only woman that I feel this way about.

　　你是我唯一深爱的女人

　　Ladies I don't know what's going on here

　　女士们 我不知道你们俩在搞啥

　　but it would've been a lot sexier if I was in it.

　　要是有我 一定更高潮迭起

　　Are you okay?

　　你没事吧

　　If you wanna talk I'm here.

　　如果你想倾诉 我就在这儿

　　Can I get a hit off that?

　　我能尝一口吗

　　You think these are good?

　　你觉得这就算好吃吗

　　God we're poor.

　　天啊 我们真穷