麦克斯，我去个厕所，你帮我盯一下

　　I already am. I've been watching model girl pretend she's eating for 30 minutes.

　　早就在盯了。我盯着那个假装吃东西的小模特30分钟了

　　Oh, she's nice. She always tips on what she would've eaten.

　　她人很好呢。不管吃不吃，该给小费不会少

　　Guess what, everyone? I have a secret.

　　大家快来猜猜看。我有一个小秘密

　　You're a woman trapped in a man's body? No.

　　你是女儿心，男儿身吗？不是

　　You're a man trapped in a woman's body?

　　你是男儿心，女儿身吗

　　You're a little boy trapped in a little girl's body?

　　你是男童心，女童身吗

　　I am a man in a man's body.

　　我是男儿心，在男儿身里

　　We're not talking about your night life.

　　我们对你在男人身里还是身下没兴趣

　　I have discovered something when going over the employee applications.

　　我在翻查员工简历时发现了件事。

　　Okay, perhaps I never worked at the Waldorf Astoria,

　　好吧，其实我没在华道夫·阿斯多里亚酒店工作过

　　but I did work with this guy, Waldorf, in Astoria.

　　但我的确跟华道夫，在阿斯多里亚市工作过

　　It's not you. Tomorrow is Caroline's birthday.

　　跟你无关。明天是卡洛琳的生日

　　Why wouldn't I know that? She tells me everything about her life.

　　为什么我会不知道？她什么鸡毛蒜皮的破事都告诉我

　　I know so much about her cycle, I'm feeling pressure to impregnate her.

　　我就是太了解她的生理周期，以至于不搞大她肚子，我感觉好罪过

　　I can do that for you.

　　我可以代劳哟

　　It's weird. Why wouldn't she want to celebrate her birthday? She celebrates everything.

　　太奇怪了。她怎么会不想庆祝生日呢？她什么屁事都要庆祝一下

　　Heads up, everybody. I just refilled the paper towels. Who's a team player? What, what?

　　给大伙通报一下，我刚把厕纸补上了哦。谁最有团队精神，是我，是我