Clare stares at her lap. “I don’t want to talk about it. Couldn’t you just take my word that he totally deserves it?”

　I think I know what’s going on; I think I’ve heard this story before. I sigh, and move closer to Clare, and put my arm around her. She leans her head on my shoulder.

　“This is about some guy you went on a date with, right?”

　“Yeah.”

　“And he was a jerk, and now you want me to pulverize him?”

　“Yeah.”

　“Clare, lots of guys are jerks. I used to be a jerk—”

　Clare laughs. “I bet you weren’t as big of a jerk as Jason Everleigh.”

　“He’s a football player or something, right?”

　“Yes.”

　“Clare, what makes you think I can take on some huge jock half my age? Why were you even going out with someone like that?”

　She shrugs. “At school, everybody’s been bugging me ‘cause I never date anyone. Ruth and Meg and Nancy—I mean, there are all these rumors going around that I’m a lesbian. Even Mama is asking me why I don’t go out with boys. Guys ask me out, and I turn them down. And then Beatrice Dilford, who is a dyke, asked me if I was, and I told her no, and she said that she wasn’t surprised, but that’s what everybody was saying, so then I thought, well, maybe I’d better go out with a few guys. So the next one who asked was Jason. He’s, like, this jock, and he’s really good looking, and I knew that if I went out with him everyone would know, and I thought maybe they would shut up.”

　“So this was the first time you went out on a date?”

　“Yeah. We went to this Italian restaurant and Laura and Mike were there, and a bunch of people from Theater class, and I offered to go Dutch but he said no, he never did that, and it was okay, I mean, we talked about school and stuff, football. Then we went to see Friday the 13th, Part VII, which was really stupid, in case you were thinking of seeing it,”

　“I’ve seen it.”

　“Oh. Why? It doesn’t seem like your kind of thing.”

　“Same reason you did; my date wanted to see it.”

　“Who was your date?”

　“A woman named Alex.”

　“What was she like?”

　“A bank teller with big tits who liked to be spanked.” The second this pops out of my mouth I realize that I am talking to Clare the teenager, not Clare my wife, and I mentally smack myself in the head.