S4E12 （7:31-9:49）

Ross: Okay, each team will answer ten questions. The first team that answers the most questions wins. Okay, the categories are, Fears and Pet Peeves, Ancient History, Literature, and It's All Relative. Now, the coin toss to see who goes first. (He flips the coin and they all watch it hit the table and stop. Then they all look up at him, to see who goes first.) Okay, somebody call it this time.

All: Oh yeah!

(Ross flips the coin again.)

Rachel: Tails!

Ross: It's heads. (The guys celebrate.) Gentlemen, pick your category.

Chandler: Fears and Pet Peeves.

Ross: What is Monica's biggest pet peeve'

Joey: Animals dressed as humans.

Ross: That's correct. Ladies'

Monica: Same category'

Ross: According to Chandler, what phenomenon scares the bejeezus out of him'

Monica: Michael Flatley, Lord of the Dance!

Ross: That is correct.

Joey: (to Chandler) The Irish gig guy'!

Chandler: His legs flail about as if independent of his body!

Ross: Gentlemen, you're pick.

Joey: It's All Relative.

Ross: Monica and I have a grandmother who died, you both went to her funeral, name that grandmother!

Joey: (to Chandler) Nana'

Chandler: She has a real name.

Joey: (answering the question) Althea!

Chandler: Althea'! What are you doing'!

Joey: I took a shot.

Chandler: You're shooting with Althea'!

Ross: Althea is correct.

Chandler: Nice shooting!

(Ross motions for the girls to pick.)

Rachel: We'll take Literature!!

Ross: Every week, the TV Guide comes to Chandler and Joey's apartment. What name appears on the address label'

Rachel: Chandler gets it! It's Chandler Bing!

Monica: No!!

Ross: I'm afraid the TV Guide comes to Chinandolor Bong.

Monica: I knew that! Rachel! Use you're head!

Chandler: Actually, it's Miss Chinandolor Bong.

（10:45-15:31）

Ross: All right, the score is nine to eight in favor of the guys. Ladies if you miss this the game is theirs, pick your category.

Rachel: (shouting) It's All Relative!!

Ross: You don't have to shout everything.

Rachel: (shouting) I'm sorry!

Ross: Ooh. What is the name of Chandler's father's Las Vegas all-male burlesque'

Monica: Viva Las Gaygas!

Chandler: Unfortunately that is correct.

The Girls: Yes!!

Ross: All right, we have a tie. Luckily, I have prepared for such an event. (He opens up an envelope and holds up some note cards.) The Lightning Round!

All: Ohhhh.

Ross: Thirty seconds, all the questions you can answer.

Monica: You guys are dead, I am so good at lighting rounds.

Chandler: I majored in lightning rounds. All right, we're gonna destroy you.

Monica: Huh, wanna bet'

Chandler: Well, I'm so confused as to what we've been doing so far'

Monica: How about we play for more money, say 150'

Ross: 150 dollars.

Chandler: Say 200'

Ross: 200 dollars.

Monica: You're doing it again.

Ross: Excuse me.

Rachel: Monica, I don't want to lose 200 dollars.

Monica: We won't. (to Chandler) 300'

Rachel: Monica'!

Monica: I'm just trying to spice it up!

Rachel: Okay, so let's play for some pepper! Stop spending my money!

Monica: I got it! How about, if we win, they have to get rid of the rooster'

Rachel: Oooohh that's interesting.

Joey: Hey, no way, that rooster's family!

Rachel: Throw in the duck too!

Joey: What do you have against the duck'! He doesn't make any noise!

Rachel: Well, he gets the other one all riled up.

Joey: Look, we are not gonna'

Chandler: (interrupting) All right, hold on! If you win, we give up the birds.

Joey: (shocked) Dah!! (Chandler motions for him to calm down.)

Chandler: But if we win, we get your apartment.

Joey: Oooooh!

Monica: Deal!

Commercial Break

[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, continued from earlier, only slightly later.]

Rachel: Monica, betting the apartment, I don't know about this.

Monica: Rachel, I have not missed one question the whole game. I own this game! Look at my hand. (Holds up her hand.)

Rachel: Why' Do you have the answers written on there'

Monica: No! Steady as a rock! Now, are you with me.

Rachel: All right, let's do it.

Monica: Come on!

Rachel: Okay. (They go into the living room.)

Ross: All right, gentlemen, you're up first.

Joey: Okay.

Chandler: Okay. (Starts jumping around.)

Ross: You have 30 seconds. And the lightning round begins'stop it (Chandler stops jumping)'now. What was Monica's nickname when she was a field hockey goalie'

Joey: Big fat goalie.

Ross: Correct. Rachel claims this is her favorite movie'

Chandler: Dangerous Liaisons.

Ross: Correct. Her actual favorite movie is...

Joey: Weekend at Bernie's.

Ross: Correct. In what part of her body did Monica get a pencil stuck at age 14'

Chandler: Oh! (Whispers something in Joey's ear and then in Ross's ear.)

Ross: Eww! No!! Her ear! All right, Monica categorizes her towels. How many categories are there'

(They both confer.)

Joey: Everyday use.

Chandler: Fancy.

Joey: Guest.

Chandler: Fancy guest.

Ross: Two seconds'

Joey: Uhh, 11!

Ross: 11, unbelievable 11 is correct. (The guys celebrate.) All right, that's 4 for the guys. Ladies, you're up.

Rachel: All right!

Monica: Come on!

(As they change places, they give each other the now patented Ross maneuver. If you don't know what that means, click here to find out The One With Joey's New Girlfriend.)

Ross: 30 seconds on the clock. 5 questions wins the game. The lightning round begins'now! What is Joey's favorite food'

Monica: Sandwiches!

Ross: Correct. Chandler was how old when he first touched a girl's breast'

Rachel: 14'

Ross: No, 19.

Chandler: Thanks man.

Ross: Joey, had an imaginary childhood friend. His name was'

Monica: Maurice.

Ross: Correct, his profession was'

Rachel: Space cowboy!

Ross: Correct! What is Chandler Bing's job'

(The girls are stumped)

Rachel: Oh gosh, it has something to do with numbers.

Monica: And processing.

Rachel: He carries a briefcase.

Ross: 10 seconds, you need this or you lose the game.

Monica: It's umm, it has something to do with transponding.

Rachel: Oh-oh-oh, he's a transponce'transpondster!

Monica: That's not even a word! I can get this! I can get this!

(Ross stops the clock, signifying the end of the lightning round.)

Monica: NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

Rachel: Oh my God.

Chandler and Joey: YEAH!!! YES!!!