经典双语笑话 第58期:老马识途(在线收听) |
Age has it's advantages 老马识途 A young vice president of a bank had embezzled $200,000 and squandered it at the race track. 一位年轻的银行副总裁挪用了二十万美金的公款,并悉数浪费在赛马上。
The bank examiners were due the next day, and there was no way he could conceal his crime. 银行的督察第二天就要来视察,而他也没办法隐瞒他的不法行为。
What's more, when he told the sad tale to his wife, she packed her bags and left him. 更糟的是,当他把此一不幸的消息告诉他老婆时,她竟收拾行李,离他而去。
Totally despondent, the young man headed for the nearest bridge and prepared to throw himself into the river. 年轻人非常沮丧地走向离家最近的一座桥想投河自尽。
Just as he was about to leap off, a hideous old hag ran up to him, shouting for him to stop. 就在他要跳下水时,一位面目可憎的老巫婆跑上前去,制止了他的行动。
"You don't understand," explained the banker, and told her about his predicament. “你不了解我的痛苦,”银行家说道,并且把他的困境告诉老巫婆。
"Ha-ha," chortled the hag. “哈哈!”巫婆咯咯地笑,
"Why, that's nothing. It just so happens that I'm a witch, and I can solve all your problems. " “那也没什么,刚好我是个女巫,我可解决你所有的难题。”
The witch seemed to concentrate, made some mystic signs and uttered a series of bizarre phrases. 接着女巫似乎全神专注地在空中比划一些玄妙的符号,口中还念着一大串奇怪的话。
"There you are," she said triumphantly. “你的问题我都帮你解决了,”她得意洋洋地说道,
"Not only is the money returned, but there's another $ 200,O0O in your safe deposit box! “不仅要回了你那二十万,你的保险柜里面还多了二十万美金!
And your wife is back at home and the whole matter has been erased from her memory. " 你太太也已回家,而且我已从她的记忆中除去了这件不愉快的事!”
"My God, can this really be true?" exclaimed the man. “我的天啊,你说的是真的吗?”那个人问道。
"Of course," replied the hag. “当然啦!”巫婆回答道。
But if you want to keep it true, you must do one thing. 但是你如果要我保持目前这个状况的话,就必须答应我一件事。
You must take me to a hotel and screw my brains out. 带我到旅社并和我做爱一个晚上。
The man gulped, for the old woman was truly hideous, and smelt horrible as well. 那个老兄吞了一口口水,因为女巫不但长像可怕,而且浑身臭气逼人。
But seeing no alternative, he did as she requested, and holding his nose and averting his eyes, performed his duty manfully all night. 由于别无选择,他答应了她的要求,整个晚上他屏住气息,别过脸避开巫婆的视线,不停地履行他的承诺。
In the morning, as he was getting dressed, the repulsive crone turned to him and said, 隔天早上,银行家正在穿衣服,那令人厌恶的丑老太婆面向他问道:
"Sonny, how old are you anyway?" “小老弟,你究竟多大年纪呢?”
"Thirty-three," replied the executive. “三十三,”老兄答道。
"And don't you think you're a little bit old to believe in witches?" “那你不认为你实在年长得可以不相信有巫婆的存在了吗?”
1.vice president 副总裁;副主席
例句:The views of the President and Vice President accord on the new tax bill.
关于新的税收议案,主席和副主席的意见一致。
2.race track 赛马场;比赛跑道
例句:He had been thinking all the time of his "pull" with the race track magnates.
"他一直在想着他和赛马场那些巨头们的交情。
3.as well 同样;也
例句:If he winks at you,you may wink back as well.
如果他向你使眼色的话,你也可以使眼色以示回答。
4.leap off 跳;落
例句:They climb walls, leap off buildings and spy on enemies.
它们会爬墙,能跳下大楼,还能暗中监视敌人。 |
原文地址:http://www.tingroom.com/lesson/jdsyxh/445558.html |