and all I could think and repeat  in the chaos of my brain was: 而在混乱中，我脑中想的与重复的是：

"You can forget about that partnership, Leila. 你可以忘记那个伙伴关系，蕾拉。

It's just never going to happen." 这样下去不会有什么结果的。

It took me a couple of days to fully absorb this incident and its implications, 这让我花了几天去完全消化这件事与它的含义，

but once I did, I reached three conclusions. 但最后，我得到三个结论。

One, that these were his issues, his complexes. 第一，那是他的问题，他的病态心理。

There may be many like him in our society, but I would never let their issues become mine. 在我们的社会中存在着很多像他一样的人，他们的观点我绝不会苟同。 

Two, that I needed another sponsor, and fast. 第二，我需要其他的支持者，而且要快。 

I got one, by the way, and boy, was he great. 顺带一提，我找到了另一半，他真的很棒。

And three, that I would get to show John what women with children can do. 而第三，我要展示给约翰，有小孩的女人可以做什么。

I apply this lesson equally well to my personal life. 这个经验在我的个人生活中也是一样好用。

As I have progressed in my career, I have received many words of encouragement, 当我在职业上有进展时，我得到很多言语的鼓励， 

but I have also often been met by women, men and couples 但我也常遇到一些女人、男人与夫妻， 

who have clearly had an issue with my husband and I having chosen the path of a dual-career couple. 他们很明确地对我们夫妇选择双薪家庭的道路存有质疑。

So you get this well-meaning couple 所以你知道这些出于好心的夫妇

who tells you straight out at a family gathering or at a friends gathering, 在家庭聚会或是在朋友聚会直接了当地告诉你，

that, come on, you must know you're not a great mom, given how much you're investing in your career, right? 哎呀，你必须知道你不是个好妈妈，投资了多少在你的职业生涯，对吧? 

I would lie if I said these words didn't hurt. 如果我说这些言语不伤人，那我绝对在说谎。 

My children are the most precious thing to me, 我的孩子是我最珍视的事情， 

and the thought that I could be failing them in any way is intolerable. 而要我辜负他们的想法无论如何都是无法忍受的。

But just like I did with John, I quickly reminded myself that these were their issues, their complexes. 但就像我对约翰所做的，我很快地提醒我自己这些都是他们的问题，他们的自卑心态。

So instead of replying, I gave back one of my largest smiles as I saw, in flashing light, the following sign in my mind's eye. 所以我不回答他们，只是回敬一个我最大的微笑，当时我看到，在闪烁的光芒下，在我脑海中的迹象。