If I could, I'd buy you a casket then Gah A castle Damn auto correct Way to ruin a moment 如果我能 我想给你买口棺材 然后 啊 是城堡 坑爹的联想功能 害死我了

　　I definitely do not want you in a casket.Hello like it just gone.castle not casket 我绝不是想送你进棺材 还在么 好像气没影了 是城堡不是棺材啊

　　imagine you are just just gone about your day on this phone and your dad 想象一下你今天都要过完了 然后你爸爸

　　you got text from your dad and it says this Your mom and I are going to divorce next month 你收到你爸爸的短信 写着 你妈妈和我打算下个月离婚

　　and then the person says what why call me please and then I wrote Disney and this phone changed it 那个人回 啊 怎么会 速回电 然后 我写的迪士尼 手机给改了

　　we are going to Disney it's not divorce no 我们要去的是迪士尼 不是离婚 不是

　　this is from somebody who is texting their aunt and it seems normal at first 这条是一个人给阿姨发的短信 一开始很正常

　　hi aunt Liz are you still going to pick us at 6:15 for the movie tonight 嗨 Liz阿姨 你六点十五分来接我们去看电影吗

　　Hi Michelle, Yes I will be there in about 45 minutes.I'm just heating up some ladybits for your father Michelle你好 我四十五分钟后到 我正和你爸爸嘿咻嘿咻热身呢

　　Wow I definitely meant leftovers is what they meant 啊呀 我绝对说的是热剩菜 他们这是在搞什么啊

　　my question about this one is why does the phone know the word ladybits.where does that come from 我的问题是 手机怎么会知道“Ladybits”这个词的 从哪冒出来的啊

　　I love these if you have any good please sent it to me.sent them to my ladybits if you like or my website 我爱这些故事 如果你有比较经典的 就发给我 可以的话 发给我的“ladybits” 或者我的网站

　　when we come back our very first guest of season nine and possibly very naked Ashton Kutcher will be sitting right there 等我们回来的时候 第九季的首位嘉宾 很可能全裸出场的Ashton Kutcher将会坐在这里