Tina Fey noted that when she was promoting the movie Date Night with Steve Carell, a father of two and star of his own sitcom, 演员蒂娜·菲曾注意到，当她与已是两个孩子的父亲、男主角史蒂夫·卡雷尔在宣传电影《约会之夜》时，

reporters would grill Fey on how she balances her life, but never posed that question to her male costar. 记者会特别关心她如何平衡生活与工作，却从来不会向男主角提这个问题。

As she wrote in Bossypants, "What is the rudest question you can ask a woman? 她在《天后外传》中写道：“对于一个女人来说，最粗鲁的问题是什么？

'How old are you? 'What do you weigh? 是‘你今年多大了’，还是‘你体重多少’？

No, the worst question is 'How do you juggle it all? 都不是。最烂的问题是：‘你是怎么兼顾所有事情的？’

... People constantly ask me, with an accusatory look in their eyes. 人们总是在问我这个问题，而且目光里还有谴责的意思。

'You're fucking it all up, aren't you? their eyes say." ‘其实你搞得一团糟，不是吗？’他们已经用眼神这样说了。”

Fey nails it. 真是一针见血。

Employed mothers and fathers both struggle with multiple responsibilities, 全职妈妈和全职爸爸都要辛苦地履行很多责任，

but mothers also have to endure the rude questions and accusatory looks that remind us that we're shortchanging both our jobs and our children. 但女性还不得不忍受粗鲁的问题和谴责的目光，被人们提醒自己在工作和孩子身上的投入都在打折扣。

As if we needed reminding. 好像我们需要提醒似的。

Like me, most of the women I know do a great job worrying that we don't measure up. 和我一样，我认识的大多数女性都有一份很好的工作，她们也经常担心自己不称职。

We compare our efforts at work to those of our colleagues, usually men, who typically have far fewer responsibilities at home. 我们会拿自己工作上的努力程度和同事（常常是男性）作对比，而他们所做的家务却比我们要少得多；

Then we compare our efforts at home to those of mothers who dedicate themselves solely to their families. 然后我们又拿自己在家里的努力程度与那些全职妈妈们作对比。

Outside observers reminding us that we must be struggling—and failing—is just bitter icing on an already soggy cake. 旁观者的议论让我们感觉到自己在挣扎应对的同时还在滑向失败，这简直就是雪上加霜。