I guess I'm still wondering if Emily and I are right for each other. 可能我还不确定我跟艾米丽到底适不适合

Does this have to do with that girl you had coffee with? 这不会跟喝咖啡的那个女生有关吧

You mean the strong, sexy angel I can't stop thinking about? 你是说那位我魂萦梦牵的身心灵完美女神吗

Who can say? I need to come up with a big idea to make some money. 谁知道啊，我必须想出超级赚钱的点子

There's no reason you can't. 没理由不行啊

That's easy for you to say. You and Sheldon already came up with your superfluid helium model. 你说得倒容易，你和谢尔顿已经想出了超流氦模型

That's just research. We're never going to make any money from it. 那只是研究，根本没机会用来赚钱

Forget helium the real superfluid is the fruit punch in this mug. It reminds me of my daddy's secret "Don't Tell Mama" Juice.  去他的氦，这杯子里的旁趣酒才是真正的超流逼，让我想起我爸的秘密，"不许告诉妈妈"果汁

Maybe that's an idea. Guidance systems for drunk people. 这个主意也许行，给醉酒人士的导向系统

They have that, it's called Uber. 早有了，叫优步叫车

Hey, in your supercooled helium experiments, did you create quantum vortices? Yeah, why? 在你的过冷氦试验中创建过量子漩涡吗，有，怎么了

Well, if you made a guidance system, couldn't you use those vortices as a gyroscope? 如果你建立一个导航系统是不是可以把漩涡当做螺旋仪使用

Wow. Never thought about that. 我从来没想过

And, since it's in a quantum state, it would maintain an infinite persistence. 而且由于是在量子态下就能保持无限持续

Groundbreaking revelations, tropical drinks. 开创性启示，热带鸡尾酒

Tell me this isn't like the best episode of Sex and the City. 这简直是最棒的一集《欲望都市》了

Okay, I gotta ask why are you wearing a bow tie? 我忍不住要问你为什么要戴个领结

I've never applied for a patent before. I wanted to make a good impression. 我从来没申请过专利，我想给人家留下好印象

Oh. Is the impression that your first name is PeeWee? 给人家留下你是搞笑人物的印象吗

Yeah, well, you're an engineer. End of joke, burn. 你自己还是个工程师呢，这就是笑话，呛死你

Come on in, fellas. 各位请进

See, he's not wearing a tie. Well, he's a patent attorney. 你看，他也没系领带，他是个专利律师

Maybe his tie is pending. 可能他的领带也还在等待审核中

So, I've reviewed your paperwork, and it seems like we've got everything we need to file a patent for your infinite persistence gyroscope. 我看了你们的文件，看起来我们申请专利需要的文件都齐全了，就是你们的无限持续陀螺仪

That's great! Excellent. So what happens next? 太好了，太棒了，下一步是什么

Well, the legal team needs to review existing patents to avoid overlap. 我们的法律团队会检查来避免与已注册专利重复

Oh, I don't think there will be. Yes, we did our own search. 我觉得不会有，因为我们自己研究搜过了

That's nice, but I think ours might be a bit more thorough. 挺好，但我觉得我们团队做得会更仔细

Get a load of this guy. Can you imagine if we make money with this? 这家伙好傻好天真，能想象我们用这玩意大赚一票吗

If we do, I am splurging on the best sinus irrigator money can buy. 真的发财了，我就要挥霍，去买市面上最贵的鼻腔冲洗器

That old sad story guy gets a little money, goes straight up his nose. 悲催的老故事，某些人赚到点小钱，就都花鼻子里去了（吸粉）

Just need you to review and sign this document acknowledging that you understand the university will own 75% of the patent. 只需要你们看看，然后签这份同意书，表示你们知道这项专利的所有权有75%归学校所有

75%? That's outrageous. This is our idea based on our research. How can you possibly justify owning a majority share? 75%吗，这也太扯了，这个点子是基于我们自己的研究，你们哪来的理占绝大半的股份啊

It's university policy. 大学政策就是这样

I know when I'm beat. Hold on, hold on. So the three of us do all the work and only end up with 25%? 我输了，我服，等等，等等，所以我们三个干了所有的活儿，却只能分到25%吗

Dr. Hofstadter, this university has been paying your salaries for over ten years. Did you think we do that out of the goodness of our hearts? 霍夫斯塔德博士，本大学付了你超过10年的薪水了，你觉得我们这么做是因为善心大发吗

Well, until you just said that mean thing, kinda. 你说出这狠话之前，是有点这么以为

And as far as Mr. Wolowitz is concerned, 至于沃罗威茨先生

I'm afraid as a federal employee on loan from NASA, your name can be on the patent, but you're not entitled to an ownership share. 你作为一个从太空总署出借的联邦雇员，你的名字是可以出现在专利上，但你无资格拿所有权股份

Wait, so this can turn out to be a financial success, and I get nothing? 所以，这个可能大赚特赚的东西我屁都捞不着吗

Well, sometimes they give you a plaque. 有时候会给你颁发奖牌啊

Well, that's not fair. We should all get plaques. 这太不公平了，起码我们仨一人一个奖牌吧

Sorry, but we can't sign this. Come on, let's go. 抱歉，我们不能签这同意书，走吧，我们走

Thank you for your time. Couple of questions about the plaque... 打扰了，对奖牌我几个问题...

So, have you been having any morning sickness? 你现在会有孕吐吗

A little. And it doesn't help that I've got this heightened sense of smell. 稍微有点，而我的嗅觉提高也真够给我添乱

Is that a pregnancy thing? 这是因为怀孕变这样的吗

Yeah. The other day I sniffed out where Howie hid the Girl Scout cookies. 是啊，之前我就闻出了华仔把慈善女童军饼干藏哪儿了

No more Tagalongs, my ass. But now you'll be able to make your own milk to eat the cookies with. 再也不吃巧克力夹心个屁，但至少你现在可以自己做出配饼干喝的奶啦

Hey, guys. Hey, Penny. I really appreciate you helping me with this. I don't know what to do. 各位好，佩妮，我真的很谢谢你愿意帮我这个忙，我真不知该怎么办了

Oh, sure. Let me see it. See what? 没事，让我看看，看什么

I hadn't spoken to Emily since I broke up with her, and she left this on my doorstep with a note. 自从跟艾米丽分手后，我就没跟她联系过，她在我家门口留下这个与字条

"Raj, I got you this before we split up, but couldn't return it" And thought you'd like to have it. 拉杰，我在分手前给你买的，不能退货了，我觉得你会想要它

Happy belated Valentine's Day, Emily." 迟来的情人节快乐，艾米丽"

That's nice. Nice, or is she trying to manipulate him? 真好，是好，还是想左右他的思想

I know. I mean, do I open it? Do I return it? 对啊，我是该拆开呢，还是还她呢

Why wouldn't you open it? 你干嘛不拆开

Well, she was pretty mad. For all I know it's a voodoo doll of me with a fork stuck in my junk. 她当时挺生气的，很有可能是一个代表我的巫毒娃娃，然后小鸡鸡被叉子插住

You don't think she'd actually send you something gross or dangerous, do you? 你不会真觉得她会送给你恶心或危险的东西吧

I know one way to find out sniff this. 有个办法可以知道，闻吧

She's pregnant, she's not a bloodhound. 她只是怀孕，不是侦探猎犬

Although I am getting a little machine oil. I think it's metal. 我闻到了一点机油味，我猜是金属类

Come on, just open it. 来吧，拆开它

You know, on Game of Thrones, Balon Greyjoy received his son's genitals in a box. 在《权力的游戏》里，巴隆·葛雷乔伊就收到装盒子里的他儿子的鸡鸡

Well, never hurts to have a spare. What is that? 多一根，有备无患，这是什么

It's an antique sextant. Sailors used these to find their position by the stars. 这是个古董六分仪，水手使用这个配合星星来确认自身方位

What a nice gift for an astrophysicist. 真是个送天体物理学家的好礼物

I know, she's so thoughtful. 对啊，她真有心思

See, she's trying to get you back. 你看，她是想拐你回去

Now, that is exactly what I would've gotten you if I had any idea what it is or what you do. 要是我，我也会买这个送你，前提是我知道这是什么，还有你职业

You know, I have too much selfesteem to let this girl guilt me into getting back together with her. 小爷我的自尊不容许这姑娘用让我心怀愧疚的方式跟她复合

You don't need to be pregnant to smell that load of crap. 不用怀孕，我的嗅觉都闻得出这屁话的味儿

Well, what if we go around the university and just get the patent ourselves? 如果我们绕开大学自己申请专利呢

We can't. It says on their Web site, as long as we work there, they have a controlling ownership of anything we come up with. 不行，大学网站上有明文规定只要我们在这里工作，我们想出的所有点子他们都有控股权

Great, so they own my idea for a Tshirt that says "Dumb as a Bag of Geologists." 这下好了，我T恤的点子也归他们了，那件印着"蠢如一麻袋地质学家"的T恤

Well, our choices are we do this with the university or we don't do it at all. 我们要么跟学校合作申请专利，要么就彻底放弃

Either way, I get nothing. 反正不管怎样，我啥都捞不着

Or, if we ended up making money from this, Sheldon and I could split our shares with you. 又或者如果我们最后靠这个赚钱了，我和谢尔顿可以把我们的份额分给你

To be clear, Leonard is referring to the gyroscope, not the Tshirt and mugs. 先说清楚，莱纳德说的是陀螺仪，不是T恤和马克杯

Oh! Now they own the mugs. 靠，马克杯也归他们了

I guess that is a way around this. You guys would be cool doing it like that? 这也不失为一种解决办法，你们俩愿意这么做吗

Of course, we can split any profits three ways. 当然，任何利益我们都可以分成三份

I'm fine with that. 我无所谓

Okay, great. It sounds like a, uh, contract might be in order. 好的，太棒了，听起来...此处该有合同要签

Sure, we could write something up. But which one of us should be the party who... 当然，我们可以写份合同，但写合同这种活该谁来干呢

You can do it, Sheldon. So stipulated! 你来吧，谢尔顿，就这么愉快地决定了

Once I found a stash of contracts under his bed. It was weird. 有一我在他床底发现他藏的一叠合同（黄书），真是太诡异了

I wonder how much she spent on this. Ooh, let's find out. 真好奇这玩意花了她多少钱，那我们来查查

It doesn't matter. It's the thought that counts. 钱不重要，重要的是心意

Yeah, yeah, and beauty's on the inside, 是是是，重要的是内在美

size doesn't matter how much she spend? 胖瘦不重要，她花了多少钱

Seriously, guys, I don't want to know. 真的啦，我不想知道

Oh, my. Oh, come on, you can't say "Oh, my," and then not tell me! 老天，拜托，你不能感叹完不告诉我啊

These things go for $500 and up. 这玩意至少值500块

Damn. All I got for Valentine's Day was a postcard saying my Vermont Teddy Bear was backordered. 靠，我收到的情人节礼物只是一张明信片，上面写着我的泰迪熊会延迟发货

Okay, so, she drops off a $500 gift and she's not trying to get back together with you? 好吧，所以她留下一份500块的礼物，会有可能不是想要跟你复合吗

Maybe you're right. Or she's telling the truth and just being nice. 或许你说得对，又或者艾米丽说的是事实，只是出于好心

Maybe you're right. Wow, I am easy to manipulate. 或许你说得对，哇，我真的很容易被人左右

Oh, guys, it's Emily. What should I do? 姑娘们，是艾米丽，我该怎么办

Okay, answer it. Just be strong. 接吧，立场要坚定

And if she starts to cry, don't make any promises. And most importantly, put it on speaker so we can hear. 如果她开始哭，千万别答应任何事，最重要的是，开免提让我们都能听见

Hello? Hey, it's Emily. Is this a good time? 喂，我是艾米丽，现在方便说话吗

Yeah, yeah. Sure. What's up? 方便，有什么事吗

Was it okay I left that gift? I'm really hoping we can be friends. Maybe, maybe. 我留那个礼物你不介意吧，我真的很希望我们能做朋友，或许吧

Um, you think you'd want to grab a cup of coffee? Hello? 你想一起喝杯咖啡吗，还在听吗

I'm sorry, I seem to be taking an annoying amount of time deciding how I feel about this! 不好意思，我貌似得用超烦人超久的时间来决定我对此事作何感想

I just... I miss hanging out with you. It's not like I lost a friend, it's like I lost my best friend. 我只是...怀念跟你在一起的时光，感觉我失去的不是一位朋友，我失去的是我的挚友

Is there any chance you'd want to come over? 有没有可能你来我家一趟

I'm sorry, I don't think that's a good idea. 抱歉，我觉得这不是一个好主意

Okay. I'm just...I'm having a really hard time, but that's not your problem, that's mine. 好吧，我只是...我现在真的很难过，但那不关你事，是我自己的问题

II won't bother you again,but please know that you'll always have a place in my heart. Bye, Raj. You're a good guy. 我不会再来烦你了，但请记住，我心里永远有一个位置属于你，再见，拉杰，你是一个好男人

Goodbye, Emily. That was rough, you guys. 再见，艾米丽，真是太艰难了，姑娘们

I know, but you did it. I'm so proud of you. 我知道，但你做到了，我为你感到骄傲

Well, anyway, I'll leave you to your girls' night. 那我先走了，不打扰你们闺蜜之夜

Are you sure you don't want to stay here with us? 你确定不留下来跟我们待在一起吗

No, I kind of feel like being alone right now. 不了，我现在想自己安静会儿

Well, if you change your mind, we'll be here. 如果你改变主意，我们会陪着你

Thank you. Say hi to Emily for us. Will do. 谢谢，帮我们向艾米丽问好，没问题