This is why they tell teen turtles never to post up on facebook. 这就是它们教导小乌龟不要乱贴照片上脸书的原因。

Oh, I didn't realize you two were still texting. 我都不知道你俩还在互发短信呢。

Well, we're mostly just sending pictures of unlikely animal friendships. 我们通常都只是在互发非比寻常的动物友情图而已。

See, there's a bear napping with a bunny. 你看，这张是熊跟兔子一起睡午觉。

And what's this? 那这个呢？

It's a labradoodle high-fiving a koi fish. It's pretty self-explanatory. 是拉布拉多德利犬跟锦鲤击掌。不是挺明摆着的嘛。

No, underneath that. This-- "How's Caroline?" 不，是图下的字，这个..."卡洛琳还好吗"

I thought this was just an unlikely animal friendship. 不是只是"非比寻常动物友情图之友"吗。

It is, mostly, but every other text, I get the idea that maybe he's not over you. 通常都是啊，但有些短信让我觉得他还没放下你呢。

He's the one who broke up with me. 是他甩了我好吗。

Well, maybe he regrets it. 可能他后悔呢。

Maybe you two are like Chris Brown and Rihanna, minus the punching and the duet. 你们可能就像克里斯小子与蕾哈娜啊，少了拳打脚踢与合唱版的。

I'm kind of surprised. I thought you guys were good together. 其实我挺讶异的。我觉得你们俩很配呢。

Andy is great. And on the surface, he was there for me and very supportive. 安迪很好。而平常呢他也总是守护我，支持我。

But then he kind of got fed up when it was so much about me and my career. 但后来他有点受不了我太注重自己与事业的这件事。

And when push came to shove, he felt like he had to pull away for his own well-being. 直到最后悲剧发生，他为了自己着想，觉得该放下这段感情。

Oh, my God, we are Rihanna and Chris Brown! But I'm Chris Brown. 天啊，我们还真是蕾哈娜与克里斯小子！而我就是克里斯小子。

Speaking of Chris Brown, I'm gonna start to batter. How's that stove? 说到克里斯小子，我要开始搅拌啦。烤箱怎么样了？

Warm, but it's really wobbly. 温度上来了，但它好摇晃啊。

Yeah, it wobbles, it smokes, and one time it burned me. 它摇摇晃晃，又冒烟，有次还烫了我。

That's why I nicknamed it "mom." 所以我给它的昵称是"老妈"。

What is this wood thing under the leg? It's the shim. 烤箱脚下的那块木头是什么？是垫木。

I think it's making it worse. 好像就是它让烤箱不稳的。

Don't! That's holding the leg up! 别啊！那是来垫烤箱脚的！

But I guess you figured that out now. You heard me say it was the shim! 想必你现在明白它的作用了。我不都说是垫木了吗！

I don't know what a shim is. I thought it was just one of those things you say. 我哪知道什么是垫木啊。我还以为又是个街头词汇之类的。

What did you think it could be? 那垫木还能是啥意思啊？

I thought it was a cool word blend. 我还以为是混词之类的啊。

You know, like she/him for a transsexual -- a shim. 称呼变性人用的"他与她"混合词。

You thought a tiny transsexual was holding up our stove? 你觉得有迷你变性人托着我们的炉子吗？

Yes, Max, I'm that tired. I thought a tiny transsexual was holding up our stove. 没错，我累到真这么以为。觉得有一个迷你变性人正托着我们的炉子。

This is a disaster, and our oven at home's too small. What are we gonna do now? 这下悲剧了，我们家的烤箱也不够大。我们现在怎么办啊？