Because my ex-husband and I got married 因为我和我前夫在哥伦比亚

In a tiny, little office of a judge in colombia. 一个狭小 幽暗的法官办公室草草结婚

Well, my mother wanted to go to the wedding 我妈妈想去婚礼现场

To show everyone how okay she was with all of it, 告诉大家其实她并不在意

So I convinced dad and gloria to invite her. 所以我说服了爸爸和Gloria邀请她

Who warned you that that was the worst idea ever? 谁警告过你这是一个最糟糕的主意

Anyone?Anyone? 谁 谁

Of course,I've -- I've moved on 当然 我 我已经开始新生活了

I was supposed to come with a date, 我本来要和我男朋友一起来的

But he just hurt his back, 不过他弄伤了他的背

Which is very ironic because he's young and -- and healthy. 这说起来有点讽刺 因为他其实非常年轻和健康

My mom started drinking these cocktails Called "horny colombians" 我妈妈开始喝一种叫作 "淫乱的哥伦比亚人"的鸡尾酒

With some of gloria's uncles, 还是跟Gloria的几个叔叔一起喝的

Whom, apparently,the drink was named after. 很显然 这酒名说的就是他们

Oh, come on,they were funny. 行啦 他们挺有趣的

They kept patting my butt. 他们一直在拍我的屁股

somebody's full of herself. 某人自我感觉太过良好了

It's a -- it's a colombian wedding tradition, they said. 他们说这是哥伦比亚的婚礼传统

I would like to make a toast. 我想要祝酒

Yeah,nana got totally wasted. 外婆喝得很醉

Uh, it was really funny. 非常有趣