I don't wanna scare you off, but my sister's getting married in a couple of weeks, and I so don't wanna go to that thing alone. Maybe you could be my date? 我不想把你吓跑，但是我姐姐几周后就要结婚了，我可不想一个人参加婚礼。或许你可以做我的男伴？

Katie, you're an amazing woman. You're smart, you're beautiful, and how fun is that handbag? 凯蒂，你是个很好的女人。你聪明又美丽，而且手袋都那么好看。

This is gonna come as a little bit of a shock. I'm fairly gay. I don't know why I said that. I'm--I'm totally gay. Just gay. 我接下来要说的 你可能会有点震惊。我是个货真价实的基佬。我不知道我怎么冒出这么一句。我，我是个彻头彻尾的基佬。基的无可救药。

You're telling me you're gay? -Yeah. -Why? 你是在告诉我你是同性恋吗？-是啊。-为什么？

I was born that way. I mean, you know, it's just--No, why are you telling me? I mean, I know you're gay. It's obvious. 我生来如此。我是说，你知道...不是，你干嘛告诉我啊？我是说，我早知道你是同性恋啊。很明显啊。

Well, it's not that-- it's not that obvious. 也没...也不是那么明显吧。

Well, yeah. The way you talk and walk and dress and your theatrical hand gestures--I did not have theatrical hand gestures. 基爆了啊。你说话、走路、穿衣的方式，还有你那很戏剧性的手势......我没什么戏剧性的手势。

Okay, maybe I am moderately...expressive. But why would you give me your number? 好吧，我确实有点...基态外露。但你干嘛给我你的电话号码啊？

Oh, because I want a gay friend-- someone I can dish with, give me guy advice, and I can shop with-- 因为我想有一个基佬闺蜜啊，一个能陪我闲聊八卦，给我男生的建议，也可以一起血拼......

Those are totally offensive stereotypes. 那些绝对是世人对同志陈旧片面的认识。

We could go see Julia Roberts movies together. I know her, and she's as nice as she seems on screen. Shut up. Really? Is she? -She is, yeah. 我们可以一起去看茱莉亚·罗伯茨的电影。我认识她，而且她无论银幕内外都很美。-不是吧？真的吗？-当然是。

Wait, what--so you were pretending to be straight, and hitting on me? 等等，如此说来，你是想假装成直男然后勾搭我？

It was just a stupid bar bet. My boyfriend--oh, he's here...Bet me that I couldn't get a beautiful woman's number. 只不过是个愚蠢的酒吧赌罢了。我男友，他回来了。打赌说没有哪个美女会留电话号码给我。

And as a proud gay man, I know it shouldn't matter, but I-I just wish everyone could find me attractive. 身为一个自豪的同志，我知道女人都是浮云，但我就是希望自己的魅力能通杀男女。

Oh. But now he's gonna get to gloat, and I guess I deserve it. 但是，现在轮到他幸灾乐祸了，不过这也是我活该。