Because we're experienced parents. 因为我们有做家长的经验。

We have a crib! 我们有婴儿床！

We have a pediatrician. 我们有私家儿科医生。

Our house is babyproofed. 我们的家对宝宝很安全。

Our house was in Architectural Digest. 我们的家被《建筑设计文摘》拍摄过。

Ronaldo, please, you're not helping. 罗纳多，省省吧，说那个没用。

They don't know what that is. 他们根本没听过那本杂志。

How can you even fit another child in this shoe box? 你们这个蜗居怎么可能再容下一个孩子呢？

You're poor! 你们太穷了！

We have a beautiful house with a big yard where he could throw the ball with the gardener. 我们有栋漂亮的房子，还有个大院子，他可以在那里和园丁一起玩球。

Okay, look. 好吧，听着。

If anybody's gonna adopt Sammy, it's gonna be us. 如果有人要收养萨米，那一定是我们。

Whoa! Do I have any say in this? 都不问一下我的意见吗？

Sal! Oh, well, you're back. 萨尔，你回来了。

What the hell are you four doing? 你们四个在干什么呢？

You walked out of here and left your baby without saying a word, so maybe we'll be asking the questions. 你离开了派对，什么都没说就把宝宝扔下了，所以也许应该由我们来问你。

I told John John where I was going. 我跟约翰·约翰说了我要去哪里。

The drunkest guy at the party. 派对上醉得最厉害的那个家伙。

Excuse me for not wanting to interrupt your fierce debate -- 抱歉，我不想打断你们的激烈辩论...

Who's hotter, Mr. Clean or the brawny paper towel man? 威猛先生和那个，厕纸包装上印的肌肉男谁更帅？

Mr. Clean. - Brawny paper towel guy. 威猛先生。-厕纸肌肉男。

We're not going back there. 不要再吵起来了。

That still doesn't explain why you would leave in the middle of your own baby shower. 这还是不能解释你为什么忽然离开你自己的迎婴派对。

I got freaked out when Jotham mentioned the Blackhawks. 约坦提起黑鹰队的时候把我吓到了。

Every time. I hear it every time. 每次，每次我都听错。

Sammy's dad is on the team, okay? 萨米的父亲是那个球队的？

And he didn't know Sammy existed -- 他不知道萨米的存在...

At least not until I just went down there and I told him. 至少在刚刚我跑过去告诉他之前他不知道。

Oh, gosh. What happened? How did he take it? 天呐，怎么样，他的反应如何？

It turns out he's married. 原来他是有妇之夫。

Yeah, I could have googled that. 是的，我本可以先在网上查一下他的。

So he's out. 所以他指不上了。

And you thought I deserted my own baby? 你们觉得我抛弃了自己的宝宝吗？

You did leave. 你的确离开了。

And then what -- what's up with this note, huh? 还有，这个纸条又是怎么回事

Look -- I'm sorry to leave this way. 很抱歉以这样的方式离开。

I'm not proud of it, but I just can't do this. 我并不感到自豪，但我实在受不了了。

This diaper bag is just a recycled purse from my single days! 这个尿布包是以前我单身时用过的包包！

I got a lot of these notes lying around for quick getaways. 里面有很多这样的纸条以便我迅速甩掉男人们。