人物:一个家庭的地狱之旅(4)（在线收听）

Dad gives me an ultimatum: go straight into in-patient rehab or that's it—he's not going to give me any more help or support. I don't go. Dad starts talking about Uncle Eric again.

爸爸给我下了最后通牒：要么直接进戒毒所，要么就这样——他不会再给我任何帮助或支持了。我不去。爸爸又开始说起埃里克叔叔。

"You saw what his problems did to Pappy and Oma. I'm not going to let myself be drawn into this behavior anymore.

“你看到了他的问题对帕皮和奥玛的影响。我不会再让自己卷入这种行为。

I have young children and a wife I need to protect, meaning his second wife Catherine Zeta-Jones and their kids Dylan and Carys. This isn't fair to them."

我有年幼的孩子和妻子需要保护，即他的第二任妻子凯瑟琳·泽塔-琼斯和他们的孩子迪伦和凯瑞斯。这对他们不公平。”

"Don't you love me anymore, Dad?""Of course I love you, Cameron. But I'm not going to nurture a relationship with you, because I think you're going to die. I've been seeing a therapist about it."

“你不再爱我了吗，爸爸?”“我当然爱你，卡默伦。但我不会培养和你的关系，因为我觉得你会死。我去看心理医生了。"

"What?""I think you're going to overdose, or someone's going to kill you, or you're going to kill someone. I'm trying to prepare myself emotionally."

“什么?”“我认为你会服药过量，或者有人会杀了你，或者你会杀了别人。我试着在情绪上做好准备。”

Dad calls to say that he's heard I'm being investigated by the DEA. "Get out of your house immediately, they're coming for you." He's in town staying at the Beverly Hills Hotel.

爸爸打电话来说他听说我正在接受缉毒局的调查。“马上离开你的房子，他们来找你了。”他住在比弗利山庄酒店。

When I get there, I see that he's with a man I don't recognize. Mom is here too. Uh-oh."Jesus, Cameron, you're dealing now?"

当我到那里时，我看到他和一个我不认识的男人在一起。妈妈也在这里。哦。“天哪，卡梅隆，你现在在交易？”

The guy Dad is with extends a hand. "Earl Hightower," he says. He explains that he's a drug interventionist, but he's here because the feds are watching me.

和爸爸在一起的那个人伸出手。“海托尔伯爵，”他说。他解释说他是毒品干涉主义者，但他在这里是因为联邦调查局在监视我。

Dad pleads with me to get out of the country. "This is a federal case, Dad. If they want to get me, they'll get me anywhere."

爸爸恳求我离开这个国家。“这是联邦案件，爸爸。如果他们想抓到我，我到哪里他们都能找到我的。”

On July 28, 2009, when I've been a heroin addict for four-and-a-half years, I open my door and see a guy in a New York Yankees hat. He says, "I'm a special agent with the DEA."

2009年7月28日，我已经吸食海洛因4年半了。我打开门，看到一个戴着纽约洋基队帽子的人。他说，“我是缉毒局的特工。”

They take me down the back stairwell. At Metropolitan Correctional Center, I'm given an orange jumpsuit to put on.

他们把我带到后面的楼梯井。在大都会惩教中心，我穿上了一件橙色的连身衣。

Twelve brutalist stories of hulking brown ugliness, MCC holds nearly eight hundred inmates, all waiting to be tried or sentenced or to testify in other people's cases.

十二个粗笨丑陋的野兽派故事。MCC关押着近800名囚犯，他们都在等待审判、判刑或为他人作证。

Since it's a place for pretrial detention, it's a maximum-security facility, with some of the most depraved and violent prisoners from the most dangerous penitentiaries housed alongside people like me.

因为这是一个审前羁押的地方，它是一个最高安全级别的设施，一些来自最危险监狱的最堕落、最暴力的囚犯和像我这样的人关在一起。

I stare at the ceiling. It's cement in a honeycomb pattern. I close my eyes and a weight descends upon my chest. I'm really here. This is happening. Hey Pop . . .

我盯着天花板。它是蜂窝状的水泥。我闭上眼睛，一个重物落在我的胸前。我真的在这里。这确实发生了。嘿，爸爸…

I'm sorry about all of this I really am . . .I really was shooting for bigger and better.

我对这一切感到抱歉我真的…我真的在追求更大更好的东西。

Also, please apologize to Pappy, Granny, and the rest of the family for all this, I feel really ashamed for being the source of any embarrassment and/or shame . . .

还有，请向爷爷、奶奶和其他家庭成员道歉，我为自己造成的任何尴尬和/或羞愧感到非常抱歉。

Thank you for your support and standing behind me on this one. It means the world to me. Your son, Cameron

谢谢你的支持，谢谢你在这件事上支持我。它对我来说意味着整个世界。你的儿子，卡梅隆