时代周刊 如何对付粗鲁的人?（在线收听）

What to say to a rude person

如何对付粗鲁的人

RECENTLY, AS THE BRITISH DOCTOR LORD Robert Winston took a train from London to Manchester,

最近，在乘坐从伦敦前往曼彻斯特的火车时，

he found himself becoming steadily enraged.

英国医生罗伯特·温斯顿勋爵变得越来越愤怒。

A woman had picked up her phone and begun a loud conversation, which would last an unbelievable hour.

因为一名女性接起电话就开始大声聊起来，而且时间长到让人忍无可忍。

Furious, Winston began to tweet about the woman.

愤怒之下，温斯顿便开始在推特上控诉那个女人。

He took her picture and sent it to his more than 40,000 followers.

还把她拍了下来发给了他的4万多名粉丝。

When the train arrived at its destination, Winston bolted.

火车到达目的地时，温斯顿便狂奔了出去。

He’d had enough of the woman’s rudeness.

他已经受够了那个女人的粗鲁无礼。

But the press were now waiting for her on the platform.

但媒体现在已经在站台上等着她了。

And when they gleefully showed her the lord’s messages, she used just one word to describe Winston’s actions: rude.

当大家兴高采烈地向她展示爵爷的信息时，她只用了一个词来形容温斯顿的行为：没礼貌。

Winston’s tale is something of a microcosm of our age of increasing rudeness, fueled by social media (and, often, politics).

温斯顿的故事可以说是我们这个人们越来越粗鲁的时代的缩影，而社交媒体（尤其是政治媒体）在这一过程中起了推波助澜的作用。

What can we do to fix this?

那么我们应该怎么办呢？

Studies have shown that rudeness spreads quickly and virally, almost like the common cold.

研究表明，无礼能够像感冒一样迅速并且疯狂地传播。

Just witnessing rudeness makes it far more likely that we, in turn, will be rude later on.

仅仅目睹别人的无礼行为也会大大提高我们在之后变得粗鲁的可能性。

Once infected, we are more aggressive, less creative and worse at our jobs.

一旦受到感染，我们就会变得更加具有攻击性，创造力下降，工作能力也会缩水。

The only way to end a strain is to make a conscious decision to do so.

解铃还需系铃人。

We must have the guts to call it out, face to face.

要解决这个问题，我们必须勇敢地直面问题。

We must say, "Just stop."

我们必须说，“停！”

For Winston, that would have meant approaching the woman,

对于温斯顿来说，这意味着到那个女人面前，

telling her that her conversation was frustrating other passengers

告诉她她的谈话影响了其他乘客，

and politely asking her to speak more quietly or make the call at another time.

并礼貌地请她说话小声点或换个时间再打。

The rage and injustice we feel at the rude behavior of a stranger can drive us to do odd things.

对陌生人的粗鲁行为感到愤怒和不公时，我们可能会做出一些奇怪的事情。

In my own research, surveying 2,000 adults,

在对2000名成年人展开的调查研究中，

I discovered that the acts of revenge people had taken

我发现大家对上述行为展开的报复行为可谓五花八门，

ranged from the ridiculous ("I rubbed fries on their windshield") to the disturbing ("I sabotaged them at work").

有荒谬的（“我在挡风玻璃上擦了薯条”），也有令人不安的（“我在工作给他们使绊子”）。

Winston did shine a spotlight on the woman’s behavior—but from afar, in a way that shamed her.

温斯顿的确凸显了这位女士的行为 - 但用的是一种远远地让她感到羞愧的方式。

We must instead combat rudeness head on.

针对无礼的行为，我们必须当面制止。

When we see it occur in a store, we must step up and say something.

当这种行为发生在商店时，我们必须站出来说点什么。

If it happens to a colleague, we must point it out.

如果发生在同事身上，我们也必须指出来。

We must defend strangers in the same way we’d defend our best friends.

我们必须像捍卫我们最好的朋友一样捍卫陌生人。

But we can do it with grace, by handling it without a trace of aggression and without being rude ourselves.

但是，我们可以通过不带一丝攻击性，不把自己也变得无礼的方式来优雅地处理这个问题。

Because once rude people can see their actions through the eyes of others,

因为一旦粗鲁的人可以通过别人的眼睛认识到自己的行为，

they are far more likely to end that strain themselves.

他们才更有可能自己主动终结问题的根源。

As this tide of rudeness rises, civilization needs civility.

当这种无礼的浪潮涌起，文明社会需要彬彬有礼地解决这一问题。