爱情婚姻失败以后的闪电浪漫（在线收听）

Al Roker: Alright. so do girls are really like a guy in that situation. And is it a good thing to rebound from one relationship to another? Well, psychotherapist Dr. Robi Ludwig and Men's journal's editor -in-chief David Zinczenko are here to talk it out. And I'm not gonna hug it out, we are gonna talk it out.

Al Roker: Good morning, both of you guys.

Dr. Robi Ludwig: Good morning.

Al Roker: So, so Robi, is...are these a good idea and is it different from man as supposed to woman?

Dr. Robi Ludwig: I think it can be a good idea coz sometimes when you date very quickly after an old relationship, it gets you back in the dating game. The danger is you don't wanna fool yourself and get into a new relationship very quickly and fool yourself into thinking that it is the right relationship when you have resolved feelings from the old intense relationship with the past.

Al Roker: Is that the key that, that they. .

David Zinczenko: Yeah, I mean the thing is you have to go into the relationship with eyes wide-open. You...but you have to come in with the expectations completely laid out on both sides so that you'll eliminate any kind of confusion or hurt feelings. But it's a really great opportunity for a lot of people coz if they don't jump into a rebound relationship or get back out there. They sit around in their apartment like taking up the activity like PITSA, and you don't want to do that. You've got to get back out there into the games.

Al Roker: So it, so it's kind of like some relationship is better than none.

Dr. Robi Ludwig: Not necessarily. Because you really need to gree your past relationship. You don't wanna be with somebody who's second-best and saddling. Some people get into a new relationship just to prove that they were the lovable. It's kind of like a soft safety net if you will. And that's not what you wanna be, thinking that you are with the right person when in fact are really not.

Al Roker: When you rebound, the people tend to pick the same person that they are just rebounding from?

Dr. Robi Ludwig: Well, that's a danger that you can pick the same type of personality and think they are different and or pick somebody that you think is just like your old partner when they really are different person you are not seeing them as a different person.

David Zinczenko: I think if you get out of the relationship that was really great and for whatever reasons it didn't work, you might find somebody who is exactly like the person you just dated, and that's not necessarily a bad thing. One of the very good things about going into a rebound relationship is you are worn out from the last relationship, so it's very likely that you are going to get in there and be natural, be authentic and you are not gonna play games. There's no games I am sure. And that's good.

Al Roker: What about the celebrities? We see these folks, I mean it seems like they live for the rebound relationship. (right, absolutely)

Dr. Robi Ludwig: We are thinking about getting rejected in front of millions of people. That's really got a hurt.

Al Roker: But they always seem to pick, you know, other celebrities, if they just I mean, like Julia Roberts picked a normal guy. you know, why is Jennifer Aniston. you know ,Brad Pitt now picks Bond

Dr. Robi Ludwig: Well I guess you pick, you pick people that you are working with, you pick people that you feel you have something in common with. And also when people are on the movie set, they are having a unique experience and that adds to the feeling of intimacy whether it lasts for a long time or not.

David Zinczenko: Well, we found that men's health is so much that it is about proximity. You get out of a relationship if you are in the workplace where so many rebound relationships occur. You know that's, it's just comes down to proximity. I think if you are, if you are on the movie set like, like actors, it's the same thing . . .

Dr. Robi Ludwig: And proximity can edge the attraction, (absolutely) believe it or not, just being around somebody can help the attraction level.

Al Roker: You know, in fact you guys have been sitting much closely.

Dr. Robi Ludwig: yep, right, we are all attracted now, it is ridiculous.

Al Roker: Thank you very much. Now if you are the victim of a rebound relationship, what do you do?

Dr. Robi Ludwig: You need to give yourself time to feel good about yourself alone. So you are not rushing into a relationship for the wrong reason and give yourself time to grieve and make sense out of the old relationship before starting a new. So you know what to look for the next time around so you can get involved in a healthy relationship.

David Zinczenko: Yeah. We recommend the Men's Heath getting a heart like female friends to go out with coz one of the things that she is gonna want to know is all that nitty-gritty about the relationship. She's gonna be like: oh, tell me everything. So there's gonna be this great download. Plus when you are out, you are going to attract other women who are saying what makes him so special that she is hanging out with him. So it's a great way to get back on the horse.

Al Roker: Alright there you go, Robi Ludwig. and David Zinczenko s of Men's Health . Thanks so much.

Both: Thank you.

Al Roker: All right