《简·爱》 Chapter 02 第二章（4）（在线收听）

Superstition was with me at that moment, but it was not yet her hour for complete victory.

这时候我相信起迷信来了，但并没有到了完全听凭摆布的程度。

My blood was still warm; the mood of the revolted slave was still bracing me with its bitter vigour.

我依然热血沸腾，反叛的奴隶那种苦涩情绪依然激励着我。

I had to stem a rapid rush of retrospective thought before I quailed to the dismal present.

往事如潮、在我脑海中奔涌，如果我不加以遏制，我就不会对阴暗的现实屈服。

All John Reed's violent tyrannies, all his sisters' proud indifference, all his mother's aversion,

约翰·里德的专横霸道、他姐妹的高傲冷漠、他母亲的厌恶、

all the servants' partiality, turned up in my disturbed mind like a dark deposit in a turbid well.

仆人们的偏心，像一口混沌的水井中黑色的沉淀物，一古脑儿泛起在我烦恼不安的心头。

Why was I always suffering, always browbeaten, always accused, for ever condemned?

为什么我总是受苦，总是遭人白眼，总是让人告状，永远受到责备呢？

Why could I never please?

为什么我永远不能讨人喜欢？

Why was it useless to try to win any one's favour?

为什么我尽力博取欢心，却依然无济于事呢？

Eliza, who, was headstrong and selfish, was respected.

伊丽莎自私任性，却受到尊敬。

Georgiana, who had a spoiled temper, a very acrid spite, a captious and insolent carriage, was universally indulged.

治亚娜好使性子，心肠又毒，而且强词夺理目空一切，偏偏得到所有人的纵容。

Her beauty, her pink cheeks and golden curls, seemed to give delight to all who, looked at her, and to purchase indemnity for every fault.

她的美貌，她红润的面颊，金色的卷发，使得她人见人爱，一俊便可遮百丑。

John no one thwarted, much less punished.

至于约翰，没有人同他顶撞。

Though he twisted the necks of the pigeons, killed the little pea-chicks, set the dogs at the sheep,

虽然他什么坏事都干：捻断鸽子的头颈，弄死小孔雀，放狗去咬羊，

stripped the hothouse vines of their fruit, and broke the buds off the choicest plants in the conservatory.

采摘温室中的葡萄，掐断暖房上等花木的嫩芽。

He called his mother 'old girl,' too

有时还叫他母亲“老姑娘”.

sometimes reviled her for her dark skin, similar to his own, bluntly disregarded her wishes;

又因为她皮肤黝黑像他自己而破口大骂。他蛮横地与母亲作对，

not unfrequently tore and spoiled her silk attire, and he was still 'her own darling.'

经常撕毁她的丝绸服装，而他却依然是“她的宝贝蛋”。

I dared commit no fault.

而我不敢有丝毫闪失。

I strove to fulfil every duty; and I was termed naughty and tiresome, sullen and sneaking, from morning to noon, and from noon to night.

干什么都全力以赴，人家还是骂我淘气鬼，讨厌坯，骂我阴丝丝，贼溜溜，从早上骂到下午，从下午骂到晚上。

My head still ached and bled with the blow and fall I had received.

我因为挨了打、跌了交，头依然疼痛，依然流着血。

No one had reproved John for wantonly striking me.

约翰肆无忌惮地打我，却不受责备。

And because I had turned against him to avert farther irrational violence, I was loaded with general opprobrium.

而我不过为了免遭进一步无理殴打，反抗了一下，便成了众矢之的。

'Unjust! - unjust!' said my reason, forced by the agonising stimulus into precocious though transitory power.

不公呵，不公！”我的理智呼喊着。在痛苦的刺激下我的理智变得早熟，化作了一种短暂的力量。

And Resolve, equally wrought up, instigated some strange expedient to achieve escape from insupportable oppression-as running away,

决心也同样鼓动起来，激发我去采取某种奇怪的手段，来摆脱难以忍受的压迫，譬如逃跑，

or, if that could not be effected, never eating or drinking more, and letting myself die.

要是不能奏效，那就不吃不喝，活活饿死。

What a consternation of soul was mine that dreary afternoon!

那个阴沉的下午，我心里多么惶恐不安！

How all my brain was in tumult, and all my heart in insurrection!

我的整个脑袋如一团乱麻，我的整颗心在反抗！

Yet in what darkness, what dense ignorance, was the mental battle fought!

然而那场内心斗争又显得多么茫然，多么无知啊！

I could not answer the ceaseless inward question- why I thus suffered.

我无法回答心底那永无休止的问题-为什么我要如此受苦。

Now, at the distance of- I will not say how many years, I see it clearly.

此刻，在相隔-我不说多少年以后，我看清楚了。