《简·爱》 Chapter 14 第十四章（9）（在线收听）

I started, or rather (for like other defaulters, I like to lay half the blame on ill fortune and adverse circumstances)

我开始，或者不如说（因为像其他有过失的人一样，我总爱把一半的罪责推给厄运和逆境）

was thrust on to a wrong tack at the age of one-and-twenty, and have never recovered the right course since.

在我二十一岁时我被抛入歧途，而且从此之后，再也没有回到正道上。

But I might have been very different.

要不然我也许会大不相同。

I might have been as good as you — wiser — almost as stainless.

也许会像你一样好 — 更聪明些 — 几乎一样洁白无瑕。

I envy you your peace of mind, your clean conscience, your unpolluted memory.

我羡慕你平静的心境，清白的良心、纯洁的记忆。

Little girl, a memory without blot or contamination must be an exquisite treasure

小姑娘，没有污点未经感染的记忆必定是一大珍宝，

an inexhaustible source of pure refreshment. Is it not?

是身心愉快的永不枯竭的源泉，是不是？

How was your memory when you were eighteen, sir?

你十八岁时的记忆怎么样，先生？

All right then; limpid, salubrious.

那时很好，无忧无虑，十分健康。

No gush of bilge water had turned it to fetid puddle.

没有滚滚污水把它变成臭水潭。

I was your equal at eighteen — quite your equal.

十八岁时我同你不相上下 — 完全加此。

Nature meant me to be, on the whole, a good man, Miss Eyre.

总的说来，大自然有意让我做个好人，爱小姐。

One of the better kind, and you see I am not so.

较好的一类人中的一个，而你看到了，现在我却变了样。

You would say you don't see it.

你会说，你并没有看到。

At least I flatter myself I read as much in your eye

至少我自以为从你的眼睛里看到了这层意思

(beware, by-the-bye, what you express with that organ. I am quick at interpreting its language) .

（顺便提一句，你要注意那个器官流露出来的感情，我可是很善于察言观色的）。

Then take my word for it, — I am not a villain.

那么相信我的话 — 我不是一个恶棍。

You are not to suppose that — not to attribute to me any such bad eminence.

你不要那么猜想——不要把这些恶名加给我。

But, owing, I verily believe, rather to circumstances than to my natural bent,

不过我确实相信，由于环境而不是天性的缘故，

I am a trite commonplace sinner, hackneyed in all the poor petty dissipations with which the rich and worthless try to put on life.

我成了一个普普通通的罪人，表现在种种可怜的小小放荡上，富裕而无用的人都想以这种放荡来点缀人生。

Do you wonder that I avow this to you?

我向你坦露自己的心迹，你觉得奇怪吗？

Know, that in the course of your future life

你要知道，在你未来的人生道路上，

you will often find yourself elected the involuntary confidant of your acquaintances' secrets.

你常常会发现不由自主地被当作知己，去倾听你熟人的隐秘。

People will instinctively find out, as I have done,

人们像我那样凭直觉就能感到，

that it is not your forte to tell of yourself, but to listen while others talk of themselves.

你的高明之处不在于谈论你自己，而在于倾听别人谈论他们自己。

They will feel, too, that you listen with no malevolent scorn of their indiscretion, but with a kind of innate sympathy.

他们也会感到，你听的时候，并没有因为别人行为不端而露出不怀好意的蔑视，而是怀着一种发自内心的同情。

Not the less comforting and encouraging because it is very unobtrusive in its manifestations.

这种同情给人以抚慰和鼓舞、因为它是不动声色地流露出来的。

How do you know? How can you guess all this, sir?

你怎么知道的？这种种情况，你怎么猜到的呢，先生？

I know it well, therefore I proceed almost as freely as if I were writing my thoughts in a diary.

我知道得清清楚楚，因此我谈起来无拘无束，几乎就像把我的思想写在日记中一样。

You would say, I should have been superior to circumstances, so I should — so I should. But you see I was not.

你会说，我本应当战胜环境，确实应当这样 — 确实应当这样。不过你看到了，我没有战胜环境。