CHAPTER TWO Going to School
When I woke up, a doctor was carrying me to my own bedroom. It was good to be back in my room, which had a warm fire and candlelight. I was also happy to see Dr. Lloyd, who was a very kind man. He was the doctor that helped the servants at Gateshead. He was taking care of me so kindly that I felt he would protect me from Mrs. Reed. He talked to me a little, and then told Bessie to take good care of me. When he left, I began to worry about what would happen.
But I was surprised to find that Bessie did not scold me at all. In fact she was so kind to me that I asked her a question.
“Bessie, what’s happened? Am I ill?”
“Yes, you became ill in the red room because you were screaming so much and were so scared. But don’t worry, you’ll be all right, Miss Jane,” she said. Then she went next door to talk to another servant. I heard what she said.
“Sarab, come here and sleep with that poor child and me tonight. I can’t stay alone with her. She was so ill last night! Do you think she saw a ghost? Mrs. Reed was too hard on her, I think.”
So the two servants slept in my room. I did not sleep all night, because I was imagining ghosts walking around the room and trying to grab me.
Fortunately, I was not very ill, but for the next few days I was the extremely scared and sad, because of my terrible experience. I cried all day long, and I could not eat or read my favorite books, although Bessie was so kind to me. I was so sad because I knew I had no one to love me and nothing to look forward to.
When the doctor came again, he was surprised to see me looking so miserable.
“Perhaps she’s crying because she could not go out with Mrs. Reed this morning,” suggested Bessie.
“I think Miss Jane is a smarter than that!” said the doctor, smiling at me. He looked as if he knew how I felt about the Reed family. “She is a big girl now.” “I’m not crying about that. I don’t like going anywhere with them.” I said. “I’m crying because I’m miserable.”
“Oh really, Miss Jane!” said Bessie.
The doctor looked at me for a few moments. He had gray colored, intelligent eyes. Just then a bell rang. It was time for the servants to eat their dinner.
“You can go, Bessie,” he said. “I’ll talk to Miss Jane until you come back.”
After Bessie had left, he asked, “What really made you sick, Jane?”
“I was locked in a room with a ghost, in the dark.”
“Afraid of ghosts, are you?” he smiled.
“I’m afraid of Mrs. Reed’s ghost! He died in that room, you know. Nobody ever goes in there any more. It was cruel to lock me in there alone without a candle. I shall never forget it!”
“But you’re not afraid now. there is something else that is making you sad, isn’t there?” he said, looking kindly at me.
How could I tell him how unhappy my life was?!
“I have no father or mother, brothers or sisters,” I said.
“But you have a kind aunt and cousins.”
“No, they are not kind! John Reed hit me, and when I tried to protect myself, my aunt licked me in the red room.” I cried.
“Don’t you like living in such a beautiful house?” he asked.
“I would be happy to leave it, but I have nowhere to go.”
“You have no other family?”
“I think I may have some, who are very poor, but I know nothing about them,” I answered.
The doctor thought for a while. :”Jane, would you like to go to school?” he asked finally. I thought for a moment. I had never been to a real school, but at least it would be a new life.
“Yes, I would like to go.” I said.
“Well, well,” the doctor said to me, “I will see what I can do for you, Jane.”
Later, the servants told me that the doctor had spoken to Mrs. Reed about me. Mrs. Reed had agreed that I should go away to school. Mrs. Reed’s servant, Mrs. Abbott, said Mrs. Reed would be happy to send me away. She told me that my father had been a poor man. He married my uncle’s sister, Miss Jane Reed of Gateshead. She was my mother. The Reed family was so angry that they never spoke to my mother again. Sadly, only a year after their wedding, both my parents died of a sickness and left me alone when I was only a baby.
But many weeks passed and Mrs. Reed did not send me away to school. One day when she was scolding me I asked her a brave question.
“Aunt, what would Uncle Reed say to you if he were alive?” I asked.
“What did you say to me?” cried Mrs. Reed. Her small, cold gray eyes were afraid. She stared at me as if I knew something she did not know.
“My uncle Reed is now in heaven, and he knows everything you think and do. So do my parents. They know how you are cruel to me, and how you hate me!”
Mrs. Reed slapped my face and left me without saying anything. Bessie scolded me and said I was the worst child in the country for saying such things. Truly, with so much hate my heart, I did feel terrible.
Christmas came, but I received no gifts or new clothes. Every evening I watched Eliza and Georgiana putting on their new dresses and going out to parties. Sometimes Bessie would visit me in my bedroom. She would bring me a piece of cake, or tell me a story. When she was kind to me I thought she was the best person in the world. Unfortunately she did not always have time for me.
One morning in the middle of January, Bessie told me a visitor wanted to see me. Who could it be? When I entered the breakfast-room I saw a tall, thin man dressed all in black. He had a cold face like a stone.
“This is the little girl I wrote to you about,” said Mrs. Reed to the stranger.
“Well, Jane Eyre,” said the stranger, “are you a good child?”
It was impossible to say yes, with Mrs. Reed sitting there, so I was silent.
“No, she is a terrible child, Mr. brocklehurst,” said Mrs. Reed, shaking her head.
“I’m sorry to hear that,” he answered. “Come here, Jane Eyre, and answer my questions. Where do bad people go after death?”
“They go to hell,” I answered.
“And how will you keep away from Hell?” he asked.
“I must keep in good health, and not die,” I said after a moment.
“Wrong! Another question: Do you enjoy reading the Bible?”
“Yes, sometimes,” I said slowly.
“That is not enough. Your answers show me you have a wicked heart. You must pray to God, if you ever want to go to heaven.”
“Mr. brocklehurst,” said Mrs. Reed, “I told you in my letter that this little girl is very bad inside. If you accept her at Lowood School, please make sure that the teachers know how bad she is. She will try to lie to them, of course. You see, Jane, you cannot try your tricks on Mr. Brocklehurst.”
I tried to please Mrs. Reed, but she always believed I was bad, when it was her children who were the terrible ones. She always thought the worst of me. It was not surprising that I hated her. Now she was going to ruin my chances of a new life at school, by making Mr. Brocklehurst think I was wicked.
“Do not worry, Mrs. Reed,” Mr. Brocklehurst said. “The teachers will watch her carefully. Life at Lowood will be good for her. We believe that students should have hard work, plain food, simple clothes and no fun of any kind.”
“I will send her as soon as possible. I hope she will learn about her low position in life.”
“Indeed she will, Mrs. Reed. I hope she is grateful for everything you are doing for her. Little girl, read this book. It tells the story of the sudden death of a young girl who was a liar. Read and pray to God.”
After Mr. Brocklehurst had left, I felt I had to speak. I was too angry to hide my feelings. I walked up to Mrs. Reed and looked her straight in the eye.
“Mrs. Reed, I don not lie to people! If I was a liar, I would say I loved you! But I don’t –I hate you! I will never call you aunt again as long as I live. If anyone asks how you treated me, I will tell them the truth, that you were cruel to me. You never gave me a chance to show you that I am a good girl. People think you are a good woman, but you are lying to them!”
At last I had said what I really felt! It made me feel much better, even though I did not know what Mrs. Reed would do to me. But I saw that she looked frightened and unhappy.
“Jane, I want to be your friend. You don’t know what you are saying. You are too excited and angry. Go to your room and lie down.”
“No, Mrs. Reed. I don’t need to lie down. I’m very calm. Send me to school soon, Mrs. Reed. Then we will both be happier. I hat living here.”
“I will indeed send her soon,” Mrs. Reed said to herself. |