NATASHA: I need to tell you. He proposed to me.
ERIC: You're kidding. Really? What are you going to do?
NATASHA: I don't know. I'm going crazy. It's really too fast.I told him I couldn't decide yet.
ERIC: Well, what do you think?
NATASHA: I know it would make my life easier here.But I would never marry someone just to get lower tuition or a green card.
ERIC: I know. You are not that kind of person.
NATASHA: But we are really good together.And I know he really loves me. And I love him too.Still... I just don't know. What is it like being married?
ERIC: I think it is different for every couple.When you think about marrying him, you have to ask yourself a few questions.
NATASHA: Like what?
ERIC: Well, first you have to be confident you and he can be friends. That's important.Now you are boyfriend and girlfriend. But can you be best friends too?Can you be together every day and really feel like comrades?
NATASHA: I don't know. We don't live together now.
ERIC: It's an important question.Because after you're married awhile, your relationship will change.You and he need to be able to get along in a lot of different ways.
NATASHA: We have a lot in common, he and I. So maybe we can.
ERIC: And another thing too. You both should have similar ideas about life.About the future, I mean. Do you both want to live in New York?
NATASHA: Well, maybe not New York. But we want to stay in the States.
ERIC: And what about kids and careers?Does he want you to have babies right away?
NATASHA: Oh, no. I would never want that.He's not looking for a housewife.He wants us both to study, and then find jobs together.
ERIC: I don't know what to tell you, Natasha. It's up to you, of course.You're a strong woman, and I think you know how to decide things. Probably...
NATASHA: What?
ERIC: Probably you made the right decision not to answer yet.Getting married is a serious thing. I have a lot of friends who are divorced now.And it's because they didn't take marriage seriously.So you need to be sure. And him too. He should be sure in his mind.Before you say yes, make sure he really understands what he wants.
NATASHA: That's a good idea. I shouldn't think only about me.I should try to think about why he really wants to get married.
ERIC: That's right. That's an important question.Because a lot of times people have expectations that aren't realistic.
娜坦莎：我要跟你说，他向我求婚了。
艾瑞克：开玩笑，真的啊？你会怎么做呢？
娜坦莎：我不知道。我快疯了，他真的太快了。我跟他说还无法决定。
艾瑞克：那你怎么想？
娜坦莎：我知道那会让我在这儿的生活容易些。但是我绝不会为了学费较低或绿卡而嫁人的。
艾瑞克：我了解，你不是那种人。
娜坦莎：但是我们真的很要好。他真的爱我，而我也爱他。我只是不知道结了婚会如何。
艾瑞克：对每对夫妇来说都很不一样。当你考虑要嫁给他时，你必须问自己一些问题。
娜坦莎：比如什么？
艾瑞克：首先你必须有信心你们可以成为朋友，那很重要的。现在你们是男女朋友，但是也能成为最好的朋友吗？你们能每天在一起并且觉得是好伙伴吗？
娜坦莎：我不知道。我们现在没住在一起。
艾瑞克：这是很重要的问题。因为当你结婚一段时间后，关系会改变。你和他在很多不同方面要能够相处。
娜坦莎：他和我有很多共同点，也许我们可以。
艾瑞克：还有一点，你们两个要有相似的生活理念。我是指关于未来，你们两个都想住在纽约吗？
娜坦莎：也许不会在纽约，不过我们想待在美国。
艾瑞克：那么孩子和工作呢？他想要你马上生孩子吗？
娜坦莎：不会，我绝对不想。他不是在找家庭主妇，他要我们一起念书，然后一起找工作。
艾瑞克：我不知道该说什么，娜坦莎。这当然要看你自己。你是个坚强的女性，知道该如何决定。也许……
娜坦莎：怎么样？
艾瑞克：也许你还没答复是对的。结婚是件严肃的事，我很多朋友现在都离婚了。因为他们没有严肃地看待婚姻。所以你要很确定，他也是，他应该确定自己的心意。在你同意之前，最好确定他是否知道自己要的是什么。
娜坦莎：好主意。我不应该只考虑到自己。我应该试着想想为何他真的想结婚。
艾瑞克：没错，那是很重要的问题。因为人们所预期的通常并不实际。 |