英语语法：81 Readers Share Their Funny Errors

by Mignon Fogarty

In this week's article, I'm going to share some of the funniest stories people have told me about errors that went out in e-mail messages and published materials.
The reason I have so many funny stories to share is that a few days ago I made an embarrassing error in the Grammar Girl e-mail newsletter. I called the Christian¹ Science Monitor the Christian Scientist Monitor, and I was mortified². I posted a sad message to the Grammar Girl Facebook page and people started sharing their stories to make me feel better.
Pretty soon I was laughing instead of crying, and I just had to pass the best stories on to you.
Religion
To me, some of the funniest stories are where typos and religion mix.
Molly accidentally sent out a memo³ that was supposed to say “Meet with Chris in Tulsa.” Instead it said “Meet with Christ in Tulsa.” She said they joked that they never imagined the Second Coming would be in Oklahoma.
And then there's Jason who was making business cards for a church and accidentally set the type so that the church was offering a holy massage⁴ from God. I bet that feels heavenly.
Finally, I won't spell it out for you, but Kirby had a hilarious⁵ story about a pamphlet that left out an important letter in the title of the “Book of Titus.” Apparently⁶ some men suddenly thought the church seemed a lot more appealing.
References
References seem to be a place for embarrassing typos. Christina once got a recommendation letter for a job applicant⁷ who was reported to be a fat and accurate typist instead of a fast and accurate typist.
Yvette once got a frantic⁸ call from an office admin wanting her to find and destroy a letter that had accidentally been sent out calling someone a horrible man instead of an honorable man.
Names
Names can be tough because some spellcheckers ignore words that start with capital letters, or if they do check the word, they don't recognize the name and try to substitute something inappropriate.
Pete sent an e-mail to his entire department calling Dr. Morrison Dr. Moron⁹, Gary referred to George Custard instead of George Custer in a news story, and Janet addressed a memo to Virgin¹⁰ instead of Virgil. Finally, Nicole called her friend Jen Hen so often in e-mail messages that it became poor Jen's nickname.
This isn't a name, it's a title, but I think it may be the worst of the batch¹¹. Judy worked with a legal secretary who typed “psychotherapist” as psycho the rapist
The Public United
There are two words that came up multiple times in funny stories. First, leaving the “l” out of “public” can cause giggles¹². Theresa wrote about a handsome young attorney who embarrassed himself over a public offering, and Lisa's director of public relations got called something else. Every teenager in Sara's town got a sports schedule from a mistyped public school, and the best one is on a resume Jonathan received from someone touting¹³ his past work in an "l"-less public cleaning area.
The second common errors is typing “united” as untied¹⁴.” Grace attends a church of untied Methodists (everyone watch out, they're on the loose), and Beth, who is an English teacher, says her students regularly write about the Untied States of America.
Busty
Just like Kirby, some other people have chests on the brain. In response to a colleague who had written an e-mail message apologizing for not replying sooner because she had been so busy, Lee responded that he hoped she was less busty today. He sent a hasty follow-up message saying that he was in no way wishing her chest has shrunk.
Helie started an e-mail message to her lovable English teacher "I know you must be busty, but..." Luckily, she caught that error before she sent it, but apparently “busy” is another word we should all approach carefully.
Randomness¹⁵
A medical transcriptionist reported that their voice recognition software does amusing things all the time such as changing “For erectile dysfunction, Cialis” to “For erectile dysfunction, see Alice.”
It's too bad Colleen's name isn't Alice, because she sent out a formal report that should have said “This report contains a compilation¹⁶ of information” but instead said “This report contains a copulation of information.”
Candi says her dad once sent her mom a text message that said “I love you, my previous wife" instead of “I love you, my precious wife.” That could cause problems!
Last week Rebecca received a proposal suggesting that her building could spruce up its interior by using faux pas painting.
Beth told someone he had written an excrement¹⁷ report instead of an excellent report, and one of Jenny's classmates wrote about new student urination instead of new student orientation¹⁸.
Stephanie had a supervisor¹⁹ who meant to write that a meeting was happening in the warehouse²⁰, but instead directed people to the whorehouse, and Richard produced a farewell gift for a beloved nurse that was meant to say “to our Jane after 10 years” but ended up reading “to out Jane after 10 years.”
Thanks to everyone who posted stories. You really made my day.
 

1 Christian   

adj.基督教徒的；n.基督教徒

参考例句：

• They always addressed each other by their Christian name.他们总是以教名互相称呼。
• His mother is a sincere Christian.他母亲是个虔诚的基督教徒。

2 mortified   

v.使受辱( mortify的过去式和过去分词 )；伤害（人的感情）；克制；抑制（肉体、情感等）

参考例句：

• She was mortified to realize he had heard every word she said. 她意识到自己的每句话都被他听到了，直羞得无地自容。
• The knowledge of future evils mortified the present felicities. 对未来苦难的了解压抑了目前的喜悦。 来自《简明英汉词典》

3 memo   

n.照会，备忘录；便笺；通知书；规章

参考例句：

• Do you want me to send the memo out?您要我把这份备忘录分发出去吗？
• Can you type a memo for me?您能帮我打一份备忘录吗？

4 massage   

n.按摩，揉；vt.按摩，揉，美化，奉承，篡改数据

参考例句：

• He is really quite skilled in doing massage.他的按摩技术确实不错。
• Massage helps relieve the tension in one's muscles.按摩可使僵硬的肌肉松弛。

5 hilarious   

adj.充满笑声的，欢闹的；[反]depressed

参考例句：

• The party got quite hilarious after they brought more wine.在他们又拿来更多的酒之后，派对变得更加热闹起来。
• We stop laughing because the show was so hilarious.我们笑个不停，因为那个节目太搞笑了。

6 apparently   

adv.显然地；表面上，似乎

参考例句：

• An apparently blind alley leads suddenly into an open space.山穷水尽，豁然开朗。
• He was apparently much surprised at the news.他对那个消息显然感到十分惊异。

7 applicant   

n.申请人，求职者，请求者

参考例句：

• He was the hundredth applicant for the job. 他是第100个申请这项工作的人。
• In my estimation, the applicant is well qualified for this job. 据我看, 这位应征者完全具备这项工作的条件。

8 frantic   

adj.狂乱的，错乱的，激昂的

参考例句：

• I've had a frantic rush to get my work done.我急急忙忙地赶完工作。
• He made frantic dash for the departing train.他发疯似地冲向正开出的火车。

9 moron   

n.极蠢之人，低能儿

参考例句：

• I used to think that Gordon was a moron.我曾以为戈登是个白痴。
• He's an absolute moron!他纯粹是个傻子！

10 virgin   

n.处女，未婚女子；adj.未经使用的；未经开发的

参考例句：

• Have you ever been to a virgin forest?你去过原始森林吗？
• There are vast expanses of virgin land in the remote regions.在边远地区有大片大片未开垦的土地。

11 batch   

n.一批(组，群)；一批生产量

参考例句：

• The first batch of cakes was burnt.第一炉蛋糕烤焦了。
• I have a batch of letters to answer.我有一批信要回复。

12 giggles   

n.咯咯的笑( giggle的名词复数 )；傻笑；玩笑；the giggles 止不住的格格笑v.咯咯地笑( giggle的第三人称单数 )

参考例句：

• Her nervous giggles annoyed me. 她神经质的傻笑把我惹火了。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• I had to rush to the loo to avoid an attack of hysterical giggles. 我不得不冲向卫生间，以免遭到别人的疯狂嘲笑。 来自辞典例句

13 touting   

v.兜售( tout的现在分词 )；招揽；侦查；探听赛马情报

参考例句：

• He's been touting his novel around publishers for years. 他几年来一直到处找出版商兜售自己的小说。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• Technology industry leaders are touting cars as a hot area for growth. 科技产业领袖吹捧为增长热点地区的汽车。 来自互联网

14 untied   

松开，解开( untie的过去式和过去分词 )； 解除，使自由； 解决

参考例句：

• Once untied, we common people are able to conquer nature, too. 只要团结起来，我们老百姓也能移山倒海。
• He untied the ropes. 他解开了绳子。

15 randomness   

n.随意，无安排；随机性

参考例句：

• The randomness is attributed to the porous medium. 随机性起因于多孔介质。 来自辞典例句
• Einstein declared that randomness rather than lawfulness is the characteristic of natural events. 爱因斯坦宣称自然现象的特征为不可测性而不是规律化。 来自辞典例句

16 compilation   

n.编译，编辑

参考例句：

• One of the first steps taken was the compilation of a report.首先采取的步骤之一是写一份报告。
• The compilation of such diagrams,is of lasting value for astronomy.绘制这样的图对天文学有永恒的价值。

17 excrement   

n.排泄物，粪便

参考例句：

• The cage smelled of excrement.笼子里粪臭熏人。
• Clothing can also become contaminated with dust,feathers,and excrement.衣着则会受到微尘、羽毛和粪便的污染。

18 orientation   

n.方向，目标；熟悉，适应，情况介绍

参考例句：

• Children need some orientation when they go to school.小孩子上学时需要适应。
• The traveller found his orientation with the aid of a good map.旅行者借助一幅好地图得知自己的方向。

19 supervisor   

n.监督人，管理人，检查员，督学，主管，导师

参考例句：

• Between you and me I think that new supervisor is a twit.我们私下说，我认为新来的主管人是一个傻瓜。
• He said I was too flighty to be a good supervisor.他说我太轻浮不能成为一名好的管理员。

20 warehouse   

n.仓库；vt.存入仓库

参考例句：

• We freighted the goods to the warehouse by truck.我们用卡车把货物运到仓库。
• The manager wants to clear off the old stocks in the warehouse.经理想把仓库里积压的存货处理掉。