【荆棘鸟】第四章 17

Her eyes lost their pleasure in seeing him, her face flooded with scarlet¹ shame; she spread her hands over her ballooning apron² as if they could hide what her clothes could not.

Frank was shaking. "The dirty old goat!"

"Frank, I can't let you say things like that. You're a man now, you ought to understand. This is no different from the way you came into the world yourself, and it deserves the same respect. It isn't dirty. When you insult Daddy, you insult me."

"He had no right! He should have left you alone!" Frank hissed³, wiping a fleck⁴ of foam⁵ from the corner of his trembling mouth. "It isn't dirty," she repeated wearily, and looked at him from her clear tired eyes as if she had suddenly decided⁶ to put shame behind her forever. "It's not dirty, Frank, and nor is the act which created it."

This time his face reddened. He could not continue to meet her gaze, so he turned and went through into the room he shared with Bob, Jack⁷ and Hughie. Its bare walls and little single beds mocked him, mocked him, the sterile⁸ and featureless look to it, the lack of a presence to warm it, a purpose to hallow it. And her face, her beautiful tired face with its prim⁹ halo of golden hair, all alight because of what she and that hairy old goat had done in the terrible heat of summer.

He could not get away from it, he could not get away from her, from the thoughts at the back of his mind, from the hungers natural to his age and manhood. Mostly he managed to push it all below consciousness, but when she flaunted¹⁰ tangible¹¹ evidence of her lust¹² before his eyes, threw her mysterious activity with that lecherous¹³ old beast in his very teeth .... How could he think of it, how could he consent to it, how could he bear it? He wanted to be able to think of her as totally holy, pure and untainted as the Blessed Mother, a being who was above such things though all her sisters throughout the world be guilty of it. To see her proving his concept of her wrong was the road to madness. It had become necessary to his sanity¹⁴ to imagine that she lay with that ugly old man in perfect cha/y, to have a place to sleep, but that in the night they never turned toward each other, or touched. Oh, God!

A scraping clang made him look down, to find he had twisted the brass¹⁵ rail of the bed's foot into an S.

"Why aren't you Daddy?" he asked it.

"Frank," said his mother from the doorway¹⁶.

 

她那望着他的双眼失去了欢愉之色，脸羞得通红；她伸出双手捂住了她那鼓起的围裙，好像那双手能遮住衣服所遮不住的东西似的。

　　弗兰克颤抖了起来。"那个下流的老色鬼！"

　　"弗兰克，我不许你说这种话。现在你是个男子汉了，你应当理解。这和你自己到达这个世上来没什么两样，应当受到同样的尊重。这没什么的。你侮辱你爸爸的时候，你也在侮辱我。"

　　他不该这么做，他早就不该碰你了！"弗兰克气咻咻地说道，揩去了正在哆嗦着的嘴角上的唾沫星儿。

　　"这没什么丢脸的，"她没精打彩地重复道，用她那明显疲倦的眼睛望着他，仿佛她突然决定将羞愧永远掩藏起来似的。"弗兰克，这没什么丢脸的，连想做这种事儿都不丢脸。"

　　这次轮到他脸红了。他无法继续面对她的注视，于是，他转过身去走进了他和鲍勃、杰克、休吉同住的房间。这房间空荡荡的四壁和几张单人小床在嘲笑着他，它的拓燥无味和毫无特色的外观也在嘲笑他；这里缺少一个能使它生气勃勃的人，缺少一种能使它超凡入圣的目标。她的脸庞呢，她那被金发的光晕衬托着的美丽而疲倦的脸庞，正因为她和那个毛茸茸的老色鬼在这暑热炎炎的夏天里所干的好事而感到火辣辣。

　　他无法摆脱这件事，无法摆脱她，无法摆脱他心灵深处的种种思绪，无法摆脱他的年龄和男子的本能的饥渴。在大多数情况下，他总是设法把这些念头压下去，但当她堂而皇之的把她色欲的证据实实在在展现在他眼前的时候，在她把她和那个老色鬼所干的好事当面对他说出的时候，他能怎么去想呢？怎么能允许这种事呢？怎么能容忍这种事呢？他但愿能把她看作如同圣母一样的神圣、纯洁、而又白壁无暇，看作一个能超脱于这种事情的人，尽管世上所有的姐妹们都犯这样的罪孽。看到她证实了他认为她做了不当的事的相法，简直叫人快发疯了；想象她绝对贞洁地和那个丑陋不堪的老家伙躺在一起，在一处睡觉，但夜里又决不相向而卧或挨在一起，这已经成了支持他神智正常的必需了。啊，上帝呀！

　　一种咔嚓的声响使他朝下望去，他发觉他已经把床脚的黄铜杆扭成了S形。

　　"你为什么不是我爸呢？"他问着那铜杆。

　　"弗兰克，"母亲站在门口叫道。

 

 

1 scarlet   

n.深红色，绯红色，红衣；adj.绯红色的

参考例句：

• The scarlet leaves of the maples contrast well with the dark green of the pines.深红的枫叶和暗绿的松树形成了明显的对比。
• The glowing clouds are growing slowly pale,scarlet,bright red,and then light red.天空的霞光渐渐地淡下去了，深红的颜色变成了绯红，绯红又变为浅红。

2 apron   

n.围裙；工作裙

参考例句：

• We were waited on by a pretty girl in a pink apron.招待我们的是一位穿粉红色围裙的漂亮姑娘。
• She stitched a pocket on the new apron.她在新围裙上缝上一只口袋。

3 hissed   

发嘶嘶声( hiss的过去式和过去分词 )； 发嘘声表示反对

参考例句：

• Have you ever been hissed at in the middle of a speech? 你在演讲中有没有被嘘过？
• The iron hissed as it pressed the wet cloth. 熨斗压在湿布上时发出了嘶嘶声。

4 fleck   

n.斑点，微粒 vt.使有斑点，使成斑驳

参考例句：

• The garlic moss has no the yellow fleck and other virus. 蒜苔无黄斑点及其它病毒。
• His coat is blue with a grey fleck.他的上衣是蓝色的，上面带有灰色的斑点。

5 foam   

v./n.泡沫，起泡沫

参考例句：

• The glass of beer was mostly foam.这杯啤酒大部分是泡沫。
• The surface of the water is full of foam.水面都是泡沫。

6 decided   

adj.决定了的，坚决的；明显的，明确的

参考例句：

• This gave them a decided advantage over their opponents.这使他们比对手具有明显的优势。
• There is a decided difference between British and Chinese way of greeting.英国人和中国人打招呼的方式有很明显的区别。

7 jack   

n.插座，千斤顶，男人；v.抬起，提醒，扛举；n.（Jake）杰克

参考例句：

• I am looking for the headphone jack.我正在找寻头戴式耳机插孔。
• He lifted the car with a jack to change the flat tyre.他用千斤顶把车顶起来换下瘪轮胎。

8 sterile   

adj.不毛的，不孕的，无菌的，枯燥的，贫瘠的

参考例句：

• This top fits over the bottle and keeps the teat sterile.这个盖子严实地盖在奶瓶上，保持奶嘴无菌。
• The farmers turned the sterile land into high fields.农民们把不毛之地变成了高产田。

9 prim   

adj.拘泥形式的，一本正经的；n.循规蹈矩，整洁；adv.循规蹈矩地，整洁地

参考例句：

• She's too prim to enjoy rude jokes!她太古板，不喜欢听粗野的笑话！
• He is prim and precise in manner.他的态度一本正经而严谨

10 flaunted   

v.炫耀，夸耀( flaunt的过去式和过去分词 )；有什么能耐就施展出来

参考例句：

• She flaunted the school rules by not wearing the proper uniform. 她不穿规定的校服，以示对校规的藐视。 来自互联网
• Ember burning with reeds flaunted to the blue sky. 芦苇燃烧成灰烬，撒向蔚蓝的苍穹。 来自互联网

11 tangible   

adj.有形的，可触摸的，确凿的，实际的

参考例句：

• The policy has not yet brought any tangible benefits.这项政策还没有带来任何实质性的好处。
• There is no tangible proof.没有确凿的证据。

12 lust   

n.性(淫)欲；渴(欲)望；vi.对…有强烈的欲望

参考例句：

• He was filled with lust for power.他内心充满了对权力的渴望。
• Sensing the explorer's lust for gold, the chief wisely presented gold ornaments as gifts.酋长觉察出探险者们垂涎黄金的欲念，就聪明地把金饰品作为礼物赠送给他们。

13 lecherous   

adj.好色的；淫邪的

参考例句：

• Her husband was described in court as a lecherous scoundrel.她的丈夫在法庭上被描绘成一个好色的无赖。
• Men enjoy all the beautiful bones,but do not mistake him lecherous.男人骨子里全都喜欢美女，但千万别误以为他好色。

14 sanity   

n.心智健全，神智正常，判断正确

参考例句：

• I doubt the sanity of such a plan.我怀疑这个计划是否明智。
• She managed to keep her sanity throughout the ordeal.在那场磨难中她始终保持神志正常。

15 brass   

n.黄铜；黄铜器，铜管乐器

参考例句：

• Many of the workers play in the factory's brass band.许多工人都在工厂铜管乐队中演奏。
• Brass is formed by the fusion of copper and zinc.黄铜是通过铜和锌的熔合而成的。

16 doorway   

n.门口，(喻)入门；门路，途径

参考例句：

• They huddled in the shop doorway to shelter from the rain.他们挤在商店门口躲雨。
• Mary suddenly appeared in the doorway.玛丽突然出现在门口。