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(单词翻译:双击或拖选)
Nineteen Nothing Much
[00:04.60]A famer is returning home after a long trip,and is met by his son at the station.
[00:14.05]This is the conversation that they have on their way home.
[00:19.62]"So,has anything happened while I've been away?"
[00:25.36]"Nothing much.I can't think of anything at all worth mentioning."
[00:33.31]"Come on,I've been away for weeks.
[00:39.37]Surelly something must have happened in all that time."
[00:44.83]"Well,come to think of it,our dog died."
[00:50.68]"Stubby died?How awful!Still,he was getting on in years,
[00:59.92]and I suppose it had to happen some time.How did he die?"
[01:06.59]"The vet1 said it was probably from eating the rotten meat."
[01:13.35]"The rotten meat?Since when do we leave rotten meat lying around for the dog to eat?"
[01:23.41]"Well,it was the horses.
[01:29.97]They'd been rotting for some time after the barn burned down."
[01:36.13]"Good heavens.How in the world did the barn burn down?"
[01:42.79]"It must have been some embers that blew over from the house."
[01:49.87]"The house!The house burnt down,too?How did the house burn down?"
[01:58.02]"Well,someone must have knocked over a candle."
[02:05.00]"Oh,Wati a moment-we don't use candles anymore to light the house!
[02:14.74]What were the candles doing there?"
[02:19.49]"They were there for the wake." "The wake!Whose wake?"
[02:27.04]"Grandma's.She passed away quite suddenly."
[02:32.61]"Oh my Lord.What did grandma die of?"
[02:39.45]"It must have been the shock." "The shock?"
[02:45.62]"Yes,the shock.When mother ran off with the farmhand the day after you left.
[02:53.87]But aside from all that,it's been fairly quiet while you've been away."
[03:00.11]Twenty An A in English
[03:06.38]Little Sammy was doing very badly in English.
[03:11.14]His parents had tried everything:flash cards,special learning centers,
[03:18.58]in short,everything they could think of.
[03:22.84]Finally,they took Sam and enrolled2 him in the local Catholic school.
[03:29.32]After the first day,Sam came home will a very serious look on his face.
[03:38.46]He didn't kiss his mother hello.
[03:42.12]Instead,he went straight to his room and started studying.
[03:47.76]Books and papers were spread out all over the room,
[03:53.93]and Little Sammy was hard at work.
[03:57.87]His mother was amazed.She called him down to dinner and to her surprise,
[04:06.05]the minute he was done he marched back to his roo without a word,
[04:12.11]and in no time he was back hitting the books as hard as before.
[04:18.87]This went on for sometime,day after day
[04:24.75]while the mother tried to understand what had made all the difference.
[04:30.99]Finally,little Sammy brought home his report card.
[04:36.74]He quietly laid it on the table and went up to his room and hit the books again.
[04:44.29]His mom looked at the report card,and little Sammy had got an A in English.
[04:52.15]She could no longer hold her curiosity.
[04:56.52]She went to his room and said,"Son,what was it?Was it because of the nuns3?"
[05:04.27]Little Sammy looked at her and shook his head.
[05:08.74]"Well then,"she asked again,"was it because of the books,
[05:14.91]the discipline,the uniforms?WHAT was it?"
[05:20.47]Little Sammy looked at her and said,'Well,on the first day of school,
[05:27.63]When I saw that guy nailed to the plus sign,I knew they weren't fooling around."
[05:34.58]Twenty-one A Man and a Bartender
[05:39.54]A man walks into a bar and says to the bartender,
[05:45.00]"Bartender,I'd like to buy the house a round of drinks,
[05:50.64]pour yourself one,and give me the bill."
[05:55.50]So,the bartender does just that and hands the man a bill for $99.
[06:02.34]The man takes the bill and says,"I haven't got any money on me."
[06:08.98]The bartender slaps the guy in the face and then throws him out into the street.
[06:17.13]The very next day the same guy walks into the bar
[06:23.37]and once again says the same thing to the bartender.
[06:28.94]The bartender looks at the guy and figures to himself
[06:34.68]that he can't possibly be stupied enough to pull the same trick twice.
[06:42.44]So he give him the benefit of the doubt,
[06:46.70]pours a round of drinks for the house,
[06:50.85]has a drink himslef and hands the guy a bill for $118.
[06:58.51]The guy takes the bill and says,"I didn't know it was so much.
[07:05.77]I haven't got that kind of money."The bartender can't believe it.
[07:13.32]He picks the guy up,beats the living daylights out of him,
[07:19.38]then throws him out into the street.
[07:24.45]The next day the same man walks back into the same bar and says,
[07:31.60]"Bartender,buy every one in the house a drink,and give me the bill."
[07:37.67]In disgust,the bartender says,"What,no drink for me this time?"
[07:45.53]The man replies,"You!?No way!You get too violent when you drink."
[07:54.67]A couple of women were plating golf one sunny Saturday morning.
[08:00.63]The first woman teed off and watched in horror
[08:06.09]as her ball headed directly toward some men playing the next hole.
[08:12.75]As luck would have it,the ball hit one of the men,
[08:17.79]and he immediately clasped his hands together at his stomach,
[08:23.25]fell to the ground and proceeded to roll around in evident agony.
[08:30.33]The woman rushed down to the man and immediately began to apologize.
[08:36.89]"please allow me to help.
[08:40.54]I'm a physical therapist and I know I could relieve your pain if you'd allow."
[08:47.99]"Ummph,oooh,nnooo,I'll be all right..I'll be fine in a few minutes.'
[08:54.96]he replied breathlessly,stil clasping his hands together at his stomach.
[09:02.33]But she persisted,and he finally allowed her to help him.
[09:08.89]She gently took his hands away and laid them to the sides.
[09:14.76]She lifted his shirt and began to massage4 his stomach.
[09:19.73]She then asked him,"How does that feel?"
[09:24.77]"It feels great,"he replied,"but my thumb still hurts like hell."
收听单词发音 |
1
vet
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| n.兽医，退役军人；vt.检查 | |
参考例句： |
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2
enrolled
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| adj.入学登记了的v.[亦作enrol]( enroll的过去式和过去分词 )；登记，招收，使入伍（或入会、入学等），参加，成为成员；记入名册；卷起，包起 | |
参考例句： |
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3
nuns
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| n.（通常指基督教的）修女， （佛教的）尼姑( nun的名词复数 ) | |
参考例句： |
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4
massage
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| n.按摩，揉；vt.按摩，揉，美化，奉承，篡改数据 | |
参考例句： |
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