应对不善谈的人的5种方法

 　　1. Change the topic of the conversation

　　1.改变谈话话题

　　If the topic of the conversation is boring, it’s actually makes a bad conversationalist. Try to change the topic whenever you get the chance. In case the person doesn’t understand it, don’t give up and keep talking about something else. Insistence¹ is a must here. The person will either go away or start talking about the other things.

　　如果谈话的主题很无聊，实际上就会成为不太会聊天的人。当你有机会的时候，就试着去改变话题。在对方不明白你所说的话的时候，不要放弃，继续谈论其他的事情。坚持不懈非常有必要。对方要么会离开，要么就会开始谈论其他的事情。

　　2. Stay patient

　　2.保持耐心

　　Dealing² with a bad conversationalist is stressful, I know. But you should stay patient no matter what. Count to ten, breath and finally listen. This way, you will show you are respectful³ and you will avoid any kind of conflict. Just because the person is a poor conversationalist doesn’t mean you should treat them badly. Respect is essential in any conversation.

　　应对不会聊天的人很压抑，我知道。但是你无论如何都应该保持耐心。数到十，深呼吸，最后倾听。这样，你就能展现自己的尊重，你就能避免任何争吵。不能仅仅因为对方是不善谈的人，就应该对他们不好。尊重在任何交谈中都很重要。

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　　3. Put yourself into their shoes

　　3.设身处地为他人着想

　　Listen to their story and offer your support. It’s so easy to avoid people without asking them why they wanted to talk to you. Maybe that person needs your help or advice. Put yourself into their shoes and try to help them and cheer them up; you will also feel good. A bad conversationalist is not always so bad.

　　倾听他们的故事，给他们提供支持。不问人们为什么想和你说话，就躲避他们，是非常容易地事情。或许那个人需要你的帮助或者建议。设身处地为他们着想，尝试去帮助他们，给他们打气；你也会感觉不错。不善谈的人并不总是那么不好。

　　4. Try to listen

　　4.努力倾听

　　Another good way to deal with a bad conversationalist is to pay attention and listen to them carefully. When you pay attention, you catch details that you would miss when you’re distracted⁴. Also, focus on the person’s body language and expressions and you’ll decode⁵ the full message and know the person’s intentions.

　　应对不善谈的人另一个好办法就是集中注意力看着他们，仔细听他们说话。当你集中注意力的时候，你就能捕捉到在你分心时候会错过的细节。而且，集中注意力看一下他们的肢体语言和表达，你就能完全听懂所有的信息，知道这个人的目的。

　　5. Ask questions

　　5.问问题

　　If you can’t avoid that person, then ask a lot of questions. Learning⁶ something new feeds our minds, whether it is useful or not. Human brain can absorb a large amount of information and an average person uses less than 10% of the brain capacity⁷. So, you can even benefit from a bad conversationalist, if they answer all your questions or maybe they will run away from you.

　　如果你不能逃避这样的人，那就问许多问题。学会一些新的东西会让你的大脑充实，无论学到的东西有用与否。人类的大脑可以吸收大量信息，一个人平均使用的大脑空间还不到百分之十。所以，你甚至可以从不善谈的人身上受益，如果他们回答你所有的问题，或许他们也会逃离你。

1 insistence   

n.坚持；强调；坚决主张

参考例句：

• They were united in their insistence that she should go to college.他们一致坚持她应上大学。
• His insistence upon strict obedience is correct.他坚持绝对服从是对的。

2 dealing   

n.经商方法，待人态度

参考例句：

• This store has an excellent reputation for fair dealing.该商店因买卖公道而享有极高的声誉。
• His fair dealing earned our confidence.他的诚实的行为获得我们的信任。

3 respectful   

adj.恭敬的，对...表示尊敬的

参考例句：

• He is respectful to his elders.他对长辈很尊敬。
• She received guests with a respectful attitude.她恭恭敬敬地接待了客人。

4 distracted   

a.注意力分散的，思想不集中的

参考例句：

• When working, one should concentrate and not allow oneself to be distracted. 工作时要集中精力，不要分心。
• Noise outside distracted her mind from her studies. 门外的噪音使她心神不宁，无法集中注意力学习。

5 decode   

vt.译（码），解（码）

参考例句：

• All he had to do was decode it and pass it over.他需要做的就是将它破译然后转给他人。
• The secret documents were intercepted and decoded.机密文件遭截获并被破译。

6 learning   

n.学问，学识，学习；动词learn的现在分词

参考例句：

• When you are learning to ride a bicycle,you often fall off.初学骑自行车时，常会从车上掉下来。
• Learning languages isn't just a matter of remembering words.学习语言不仅仅是记些单词的事。

7 capacity   

n.能力，力量，接受力；容量，能量，容积

参考例句：

• She is employed by the president in an advisory capacity.她被总裁聘为顾问。
• This carriage has a seating capacity of 120 people.这节车厢定员120人。