“奔三”路上的那些焦虑

 　　If you're approaching the big 3-0 and feeling suddenly aimless and insecure about your career and relationships, you might in the middle of what we know anecdotally as a pre-30 meltdown. Recognizing the symptoms of a late-20s identity crisis can be the first step to making the start of your third decade a lot less stressful -- and realizing that you're probably right where you need to be, after all.

　　如果你正在奔三的道路上，突然觉得自己对于职业生涯和感情关系缺乏目标、又充满不安全感，也许你已经患上了30岁综合症。在25岁之后能意识到自己处于身份危机，这是减轻30岁后的焦虑的第一步。也许你会发现你只是在顺其自然而已。

　　A Sense Of Not Measuring Up

　　症状一：什么都没搞定的挫败感

　　Now that your adult life seems to have officially arrived, you may be feeling the need to get it together, fast. Suddenly, it might seem that if you want marriage and children -- things that your mother may have had at 30 -- you'd better start finding them now.

　　快步入30岁了，似乎意味着你的成年人生活正式到来，你或许有种迫切感要把一切该做好的事情尽快做好。突然，你就想像你母亲那样在30岁时把结婚生子都完成了，至少也要开始行动起来。

　　Try not to stress about getting all your ducks in a row by the time you hit 30 -- the most important thing at this point in your life is to figure out what you want and be working towards it, not to already “have it all.”

　　试着不要给自己压力，让自己在30岁一到就把这些事都挨个地完成。你生活中最重要的事情是知道自己到底要什么，并且朝着自己的目标努力，而不是“把一切做完”。

　　Lying About Your Age For The First Time

　　症状二：第一次在年龄上撒谎

　　Although you may have been worried about aging since you graduated from college, most of us don't start to really dread² our birthdays until the mid¹ to late-20s. If you just found yourself lying about your age for the first time, pre-30 angst may be kicking in.

　　即使你从大学毕业后就开始担心衰老的问题，但我们中的大多数还是在25岁之后开始真正感到过生日的压力。如果你发现自己开始在年龄上撒谎的话，那么你或许已经患上了30岁综合症。

　　Questioning The Value Of Past Achievements

　　症状三：开始怀疑过往的成就是否有价值

　　For some women, the insecurity of a pre-30 crisis inolves doubting their past accomplishments³ -- the wins at work and personal victories that you were once proud of might not seem to amount of much when you're focusing on the ways that your life has fallen short of your own definition of success.

　　有些女性的30岁综合症会表现在对过往成就的怀疑上。过去在工作中获得的成功以及个人的一些成就，这些原本引以为傲的荣誉看起来并不是生活的重心，你开始对成功的定义有了迷茫。

　　Increased Insecurity About Dating And Relationships

　　症状四：对约会和恋爱缺乏安全感

　　Sadness and stress over a breakup, romantic relationship or lack of relationship is a common symptom of a late 20-something crisis. It doesn't matter whether you're single, married, dating around, or coupled in any form -- your relationship status becomes a daily source of stress and anxiety during the pre-30 crisis. You may find yourself suddenly unsatisfied with a long-term relationship or anxious about not having gained enough dating experiences in your 20s.

　　25岁之后，对于分手、恋爱或者单身都变得难过和焦虑，这也是30岁综合症的症状之一。无论你现在是单身、已婚、还是约会中，这些身份都会成为日常生活中压力和焦躁的来源。你会突然就对长期的恋爱关系感到不满，或者对20几岁没有多谈恋爱变得焦虑起来。

　　Regret

　　症状五：后悔

　　Dwelling⁴ on all the things that you could have done differently in your life is a hallmark of the pre-30 crisis. Everything you might be unsatisfied with at work or in your personal life feels like a product of poor choices or missed opportunities.

　　30岁综合症的一大标志性症状就是认为过往做的所有事情如果换种做法会变得不一样。你在工作或个人生活中还感到不满意的事情，都会被当成是错误的选择和错失的机会所造成的。

　　Money Worries

　　症状六：担心钱的问题

　　Suddenly, your financial situation may feel forebodingly unstable⁵ and looks a whole lot more pathetic than it ever did before. By the age of 30, every woman should have learned to master certain basic money skills, like keeping a budget. But if you haven't yet, at least you're aware of it, and there are plenty of tools available online and off to help you move towards financial stability going forward.

　　突然间，你的经济状况会让你感到很不稳定，比从前任何时候都让人揪心。到了30岁，所有女性都应该学一些基本的理财方式，比如坚持做预算。如果你还没开始理财，至少也要开始关注这个问题了。现在有很多线上和线下的理财工具，可以帮助你实现财务的稳定和增值。

　　Questioning Your Career Path

　　症状七：对自己的职业生涯生疑

　　As you move through your 20s, it's normal to realize that your dreams aren't quite what they had seemed to be when you were younger. And as you approach 30 and reevaluate your life path, you may be considering quitting your job and completely changing career paths.

　　20多岁了，你开始意识到自己的梦想和年幼时想象得并不一样。当你在奔三的时候，重新审视你的生活轨迹，你会想要辞职，重新换个职业。

　　The questions that people come in with might be, “I'm in IT earning $130,000 a year but why am I doing this?” And it's an important question to ask. If you're feeling unfulfilled at work or uncertain about a career path you chose based on the salary, it may be time to look at your future in that career.

　　你可能提出的问题是“我从事IT工作，每年可以挣13万，但我为什么要做这个呢？”这是一个很重要的问题。如果基于你所获的薪酬，你对自己的工作或职业生涯无法感到满足，那么是时候该想想这份职业能带给你什么样的未来了。

　　Not Feeling Like Yourself

　　症状八：感到自己不像自己了

　　Any major life change can trigger a shift in values and perspective that leads to an identity crisis. You may be doubting yourself and questioning who you are as your 30th birthday approaches, wondering how you got where you are in life and calling your most deeply-held values into question.

　　任何重大的生活改变都会引发价值观的变化，从而引起身份危机。在你30岁生日临近的时候，你也许会怀疑自己，并拷问自己到底是谁，疑惑自己是如何到了现在这个地步，唤醒你内心最深处的疑问。

　　And this can be a good thing. You probably do know who you are -- but you're just aware that you have a lot of options. Modern women often experience what she refers to as choice overload⁶, and that the remedy to keep a healthy perspective on decision-making.

　　这是一件好事。你也许知道自己是谁，只不过你觉得自己有很多选择。现代女性经常会面临选择过多的局面，解决方法就是知道如何做出正确的决定。

　　Constantly Comparing Yourself To Your Peers

　　症状九：常常与同龄人比较

　　The pre-30 crisis feeds on comparison to others of the same age, and it can lead to a constant nagging⁷ feeling that your life doesn't measure up. You may be going on Facebook to check up on former friends and enemies to see who has their adult like “together” -- and who doesn't. But of course, in the end, neither outcome will make you feel better about your own situation. Sometimes. Admit where you are, and refuse to be ashamed of it. You're doing the best you can.

　　30岁综合症的人会常常与同龄人去比较，造成的后果就是感到自己什么事都没搞定（参见症状一）。你也许会上脸谱网去看看过去的朋友和敌人现在都过得怎么样了，有谁混得好了，有谁混不下去了。无论结果如何，都不会改善你对自己的看法。有时候，承认自己所处的位置，不要因此而羞愧。你就已经做到了最好。

　　Not Wanting To Go Out

　　症状十：不愿意出门

　　Turning to Netflix and a cup of tea night after night may actually be symptomatic of a pre-30 crisis. If you've been isolating⁸ yourself from friends and frequently declining invitations, your need for alone time may be a reaction to elevated stress levels. Be sure to make time for low-key activities with close friends to keep your spirits up.

　　夜复一夜地泡杯茶、在网上看片子，这也是30岁综合症的症状之一。如果你经常婉拒朋友的邀请，习惯自己一个人待着，这也许是你应对压力的方式。还是花些时间和朋友们在一起吧，也好让自己的精神振奋起来。

1 mid   

adj.中央的，中间的

参考例句：

• Our mid-term exam is pending.我们就要期中考试了。
• He switched over to teaching in mid-career.他在而立之年转入教学工作。

2 dread   

vt.担忧，忧虑；惧怕，不敢；n.担忧，畏惧

参考例句：

• We all dread to think what will happen if the company closes.我们都不敢去想一旦公司关门我们该怎么办。
• Her heart was relieved of its blankest dread.她极度恐惧的心理消除了。

3 accomplishments   

n.造诣；完成( accomplishment的名词复数 )；技能；成绩；成就

参考例句：

• It was one of the President's greatest accomplishments. 那是总统最伟大的成就之一。
• Among her accomplishments were sewing,cooking,playing the piano and dancing. 她的才能包括缝纫、烹调、弹钢琴和跳舞。 来自《现代英汉综合大词典》

4 dwelling   

n.住宅，住所，寓所

参考例句：

• Those two men are dwelling with us.那两个人跟我们住在一起。
• He occupies a three-story dwelling place on the Park Street.他在派克街上有一幢3层楼的寓所。

5 unstable   

adj.不稳定的，易变的

参考例句：

• This bookcase is too unstable to hold so many books.这书橱很不结实，装不了这么多书。
• The patient's condition was unstable.那患者的病情不稳定。

6 overload   

vt.使超载；n.超载

参考例句：

• Don't overload the boat or it will sink.别超载，否则船会沉。
• Large meals overload the digestive system.吃得太饱会加重消化系统的负担。

7 nagging   

adj.唠叨的，挑剔的；使人不得安宁的v.不断地挑剔或批评（某人）( nag的现在分词 )；不断地烦扰或伤害（某人）；无休止地抱怨；不断指责

参考例句：

• Stop nagging—I'll do it as soon as I can. 别唠叨了—我会尽快做的。
• I've got a nagging pain in my lower back. 我后背下方老是疼。 来自《简明英汉词典》

8 isolating   

adj.孤立的，绝缘的v.使隔离( isolate的现在分词 )；将…剔出（以便看清和单独处理）；使（某物质、细胞等）分离；使离析

参考例句：

• Colour filters are not very effective in isolating narrow spectral bands. 一些滤色片不能很有效地分离狭窄的光谱带。 来自辞典例句
• This became known as the streak method for isolating bacteria. 这个方法以后就称为分离细菌的划线法。 来自辞典例句