Mr. President, we have a situation.

He was trained to kill...

CIA, FBI, DEA, all rolled up into one.

... then left for dead.

I know what they did to your family.

And now he's back...

Machete.

... for his most dangerous mission yet.

We need you, Machete.

_____________1___________.

He's got a missile aimed at Washington.

Noah had his ark, I got mine.

Machete, go kick some ass.

I'll be your handler.

Are you ready for this?

Good for calls, texts, tweets.

Machete no tweet.

The enemy may have the missile.

But we have Machete.

Machete kills.

That's what he does.

____________2__________.

Bring me my Double Ds.

You've seen my face?

Muy bien, indeed.

I smell fish taco.

Machete!

Let's do this.

__________3__________.

Nobody knows Machete.

Machete Kills.

Machete!

Damn, you're good!