since we moved from D.C. To Orlando 已经有一个月了

　　and we were all looking forward 我们也很期待

　　to my mom's family coming to visit. 我妈妈的娘家人来探亲

　　This is a nightmare. Well not all of us.  这简直是场噩梦啊，好吧，也不是我们所有人啦

　　You know your brother-in-law's only coming to gloat 你知道你的小舅子就是为了来幸灾乐祸

　　about our restaurant not being successful. 看我们的餐馆经营得不好的

　　Louis they're family. 路易斯，他们是家人啊

　　They're coming to gloat about all of our misfortunes... 他们是来幸灾乐祸我们所有的不幸的

　　the restaurant Eddie. 餐馆啦，艾迪啦等等的

　　Getting away from Steve and his stupid store 远离史蒂夫和他那可笑的商店

　　was supposed to be one of the perks of moving here. 本来应该是我们搬到这来的最大的好处的

　　Okay we got the I-shaped sectional 好的，我们这里有工字型组合式家具

　　the entertainment center the deluxe love seat... 娱乐中心，高级双人座椅

　　Is this man bothering you? 这家伙在烦你们吗？

　　Say the word and I'll call the police. 一句话的事啊，我这就叫警察来

　　That's funny. 真有趣啊

　　Uh Mr. And Mrs. uh Oberg 额，欧伯格先生，女士

　　this is my boss-in-law Steve. 这是我的老板，史蒂夫

　　I was just about to finalize... 我正要总结...

　　getting us all some twizzlers. 给我们拿点橡皮糖来

　　There were no twizzlers. 那儿根本就没有橡皮糖

　　We have twizzlers?! What? No.  我们有橡皮糖吃？！什么？不是

　　I thought there were twizzlers. 我还以为有橡皮糖吃呢

　　At least with your whole family coming 至少你的全家一起来

　　Steve can't drive his stupid used Miata. 史蒂夫就不能开着他那辆破烂二手马自达来了

　　Steve says his miata is new. It's not new! It's used!  史蒂夫说他的马自达是新的，不是新的！就是二手的！

　　I'm sorry. It's just... I... 抱歉，只是...我...

　　No it's okay. You're right. 没关系啦，你是对的

　　My sister can't wait to see us struggling in this swampland. 我姐姐也迫不及待地想看到我们在这片沼泽地里挣扎呢

　　How do you know? 你咋知道？

　　She called me yesterday and she told me. 她昨天给我打电话了，她告诉我了

　　I can't wait to see your new home. 我等不及要去看你的新家了

　　It's a little cozy 我们家还挺舒服的

　　but there's always room for my dear sister. 当然也永远有块地儿是为我亲爱的姐姐准备的

　　The whole family's so proud of you. 我们全家都很为你自豪的

　　She's just bitter because I have always been mom's favorite. 她这么恶毒就是因为我一直是妈妈的最爱

　　That's why she's coming. 这也是为什么她要来

　　She wants mom to see us struggling. 她想让妈妈看我们挣扎在温饱线上

　　But they will be in for a surprise 但他们会大吃一惊的

　　when they see how well we are doing. 他们会看到我们的生活是有多好

　　But we're not. 但我们的生活没有多好啊

　　Yes but they don't know that. 是啊，但他们不会知道这一点的

　　I've never loved you more. 我从没像现在这么爱你

　　Ew! Gross! 呃，恶心死了！

　　I think it's great 我认为你们还能在

　　that you guys still have passion in your marriage. 婚姻中存在着激情实在是极好的

　　My relatives were on their way 我的亲戚们就要来了

　　but the way my parents were acting you would have thought 但我的父母表现得会让你以为

　　Mariah Carey was coming to visit. 牛姐玛莉亚，凯莉要大驾寒舍

　　I mean a hot pre-Nick cannon 我指当年性感火辣，还未做他人妇的

　　the Washington wizards dress" Mariah Carey. 穿着华盛顿奇才队球服的玛莉亚?凯莉

　　They were putting up fake lemon trees all over the house 他们把假的柠檬树放在门口

　　fancying up the bathroom... 把浴室装扮得更高档

　　basically doing anything they could 基本上做了所有能做的

　　to look like ballers. 让房子看起来像个宴会厅

　　All right the record should reflect now 好了，该份记录应该可以表明

　　that the defendant is present with counsel. 被告是有律师陪同的

　　You may be seated if you wish. 你可以坐下了

　　Even though my parents were tripping I was psyched 尽管我父母很不放心，我却兴奋异常

　　because my favorite cousin Justin was coming. 因为我最爱的表哥贾斯汀要来了

　　Justin was only six months older than me 他只比我大六个月

　　but he was the one who changed my life forever. 但他是那个改变了我人生的人

　　Yo. Check this out. 哟，听听这个

　　You are now about to witness 你即将见证的是

　　the strength of street knowledge. 街头文化的魅力

　　From that moment on I was A.W.O... 自那时起，我便成为了A.W.O...

　　Asian with obsession. 中了邪的亚洲人

　　I couldn't wait to show Justin 我等不及要让贾斯汀看看

　　how deep my hip-hop knowledge had gotten. 如今我已了解了多少嘻哈音乐知识

　　Everything had to be perfect 自我拿出崭新的图派克专辑那一刻起

　　for when I busted out the new 2Pac. 一切都必须要完美

　　What's a 2-pack? 啥是图派克？

　　It's not for you. Your baby ears aren't ready. 这不是给你听的，你那宝贝耳朵还没准备好

　　Remember the time a ladybug crawled in my ear? 还记得那次有只瓢虫爬进我耳朵吗？

　　Evan Emery grandma chu will be staying in your room. 埃文，埃默里，姥姥会住在你们房间

　　Yay! Grandma party!  耶！姥姥奶奶大聚会！

　　You won't be sleeping there. 你们不会睡在那里

　　Aw. Aw. 额，额

　　I have made other arrangements. 我已经做了其他的安排

　　Why can't we sleep on the couch? 为什么我们不能睡沙发？

　　Because then your aunt and Uncle will know 因为那样的话你们的舅舅舅妈就会知道

　　we don't have enough bedrooms. 我们没有足够的房间了

　　And they must never know that. 不能让他们知道这点

　　Okay I just talked to Mitch 好了，我刚刚跟米奇说过了

　　and we have a great promotion set for Saturday. 我们周六举办升迁会

　　All the boomin' onions you can eat for 99 cents. 所有炒洋葱一律99美分

　　Yes! Cattleman's will be packed when we take your family there.  好极了！等你的家人来的时候牧场主的牧场已经准备就绪

　　Won't you lose money? 你不会赔钱吗？

　　Well sometimes you have to spend money you don't have 这个嘛，有时候你就得超额花钱

　　to make it seem like you have money that you don't spend. 才能让你看起来有钱花不掉

　　Mm! 嗯哼

　　Okay house is ready. 好了，房子捯饬好了

　　Now it's our turn. We need a new look. 现在该捯饬我们了，我们需要整个新造型

　　We need a look that instantly says... "Success." 要让人一看就会说...“成功”

　　Let me explain. 让我解释下

　　In addition to fake lemon trees 除了假的柠檬树

　　another thing Chinese people did to show prosperity 中国人做的另一件用来显摆的事

　　was get a perm. 就是去烫头

　　I don't know why but to my people 我不明白为什么，但对于我们来说

　　curls were like dollar signs. 卷发就象征着美元符号，你是个壕

　　These success perms were a great idea. 烫成功卷发真是个好主意

　　I feel like a curly-headed lion surveying my kingdom. 我就像是只卷毛狮王在俯瞰我的领土

　　They're coming! They're coming! 他们来啦！他们来啦！

　　We're ready. 准备好了

　　Oh! 哦！

　　Connie! 康妮！

　　Oh your boobs are so big! 哦，你的胸还真大啊！

　　I know. They're new. 我知道啊，全新的哟

　　I had to give up jogging. 我都不得不放弃慢跑了

　　Oh I can tell. 哦，看得出来

　　Oh! They are big. 哦！他们是挺大的

　　Nirvana? 你是要圆寂了吗？

　　Justin yo why you dressed like that? 贾斯汀，哟，你怎么打扮成这样？

　　It's grunge. 这是颓废风

　　It reflects what I feel on the inside. 它完美地反映了我内心的感受

　　Your shirt looks like a picnic blanket. 你的衬衫像个野餐布似的

　　Thank you. 呵呵，谢谢了

　　Where's Steve?  史蒂夫在哪？

　　He drove separately. 他单独开车

　　He drove separately for 13 hours... Mm. 他已经单独开了13个小时了...嗯

　　Just so he could bring that stupid car. 这样就能炫耀一下他那傻瓜车了

　　He got a success perm too. 他还有个成功的杀马特发型

　　I see that. I can see that. 我看到了，我能看到

　　Did somebody order chinese?! 有人订了中餐吗？！

　　Ooh! Fancy place. 噢！房子真不错

　　Have I got the "Huang" House? 我已经来到了“黄”家了嘛？

　　That's a great joke Steve. Oh hi!  玩笑很好笑，史蒂夫，噢，嗨！

　　Funny every time you tell it. 你每次讲都可好笑了

　　Sweet ride Uncle Steve. 车子好棒，史蒂夫舅舅

　　Hey thanks Emery. 嘿，谢谢，埃默里

　　If you work hard and you're smart like me 如果你努力工作而且又像我一样聪明

　　some day you can have a brand-new Miata. 你有一天也会有个崭新的马自达车的

　　Or used because it's used. 或者是用过的，因为这车是二手的

　　Yo. 你

　　You want to help me with this? 你不来帮帮我么？

　　I have my own baggage. 我自己还有包袱呢

　　Emotional. 心理上的

　　So the furniture store is doing really well 所以，家具商店最近经营得不错

　　and I thought "Why not?" 然后我觉得，“为什么不呢”

　　You only live once right? 你就活这么一次，对不对？

　　And now you are equipped with air bags. 现在你全身上下都是气袋了

　　So how was the trip down? 那么，旅行怎么样？

　　I know mom can be so critical of your driving. 我知道妈妈对你开车的态度肯定很严厉

　　Oh she was complaining the whole time... 噢，她一直在抱怨

　　Mm. 嗯

　　Oh! Ah-ma! 噢！妈妈！

　　About you. 抱怨你

　　What?! 什么？！

　　She's been feeling a little abandoned you know? 她感到有点被抛弃了，你懂吗？

　　Because you abandoned her. 因为你抛弃了她

　　Connie! 康妮！

　　Looks like you're not her favorite anymore. 看来你已经不是她最宠爱的孩子了

　　Guess who is. 猜猜现在谁是呢

　　Are you thinking? Are you thinking about who is? 你想想？你想想现在她最宠爱谁？

　　Connie! 康妮！

　　Coming ah-ma. 来了，妈妈

　　And that's my lazy Susan 那是我的懒Susan

　　because you know sometimes we get lazy. 因为，你知道的，有时候我们会懒得动

　　Oh that's my uh pager. 噢，是我的，额，寻呼机

　　We're opening a second store. Business right? 我们正在开第二家店，买卖的事，你懂吧？

　　Tell me about it. 跟我说说

　　My restaurant is so successful 我的餐厅特别成功

　　I had to put in a dedicated fax line. 我都得设一个专线

　　It seems kind of quiet now Louis. 不过现在貌似挺安静的哈，路易斯

　　It's in recharge mode. Tired. 它正在充电，没电了

　　All right dad it's all set up. 好了，爸爸，一切就绪

　　I brought along my Internet computer. 我把我的电脑带来了

　　I need to check on my store's webpage. 我得没事看看我店铺的网页

　　Hmm. 嗯

　　I have to go to the bathroom. 我要去趟洗手间

　　Yeah go go. Go to the bathroom. 好的，去吧去吧，去洗手间吧

　　We got plenty of time. 我们有的是时间

　　All right deputy jex 好了，代理人杰克斯

　　would you just take a step back please? 可以请你往后退一步吗？

　　This is people's 164-a? Is that the right-hand glove? 这是第164号a嫌疑人，这就是那只右手手套吗？

　　Seems to be having a problem putting the glove on his hand. 看起来他戴手套有点困难

　　The real juice is loose. 真正的凶手正逍遥法外

　　Mom would you like some tea? You must be so tired. 妈妈，喝点茶吗？您可定很累了

　　I have green oolong chrysanthemum sleepytime! 我有绿茶，乌龙菊花茶，安眠茶！

　　Something was up with my cousin 我的表亲不对劲

　　but whatever it was I knew what would snap him out of it. 不管因为什么，我知道这都能让他振作起来

　　I was thinking we should start with the old stuff 我觉得我们应该从旧的东西开始

　　and work forward. 然后向前推进

　　Are you guys having a rap party? 你们几个要办一个说唱聚会吗？

　　Hammer I'm M.C.  Hammer！我要当M.C.

　　Get out! 出去！

　　Come on. Let's go. 真是的，我们走

　　Sorry about that. Kids. 对不起了，孩子们

　　I'm thinking of moving to Seattle. 我正在考虑搬去西雅图

　　Or we could just start with this. 这样我们就能玩这个了

　　Oh I-I'm not into 2Pac anymore. He's just a little immature. 噢，我-我已经对2Pac不感冒了，他有点幼稚

　　You want to listen to some real grown-up music? 你想听听真正的成年人听的音乐吗？

　　Oh it's so good. 太好听了

　　This woman's terrible. 这女的太难听了

　　Mom won't even talk to me. 妈妈根本不和我说话

　　undefined undefined

　　Aw. That's too bad. 啊哦，这可太糟糕了

　　Thanks for letting me and Steve stay in your bedroom. 谢谢你让我和史蒂夫住在你的卧室

　　It's cute. Like a little mouse shoe. 这屋子太漂亮了，像个老鼠洞一样

　　You are loving this aren't you? 你特别享受妈妈和我有矛盾，是不是？

　　Not at all but if you want 不不不，但是如果你想的话

　　I can put in a good word for you with mom 我可以在我们晚上聊天的时候

　　during our evening chat. 在妈妈那给你美言两句

　　We put on our slippers and talk about the family. 我们穿着拖鞋，谈论着家庭那些话题

　　We call it slipper talk. 我们管这叫做拖鞋夜话

　　Okay fine. 好吧，好吧

　　You may be mom's new favorite 你可能是妈妈的新欢

　　but I'm going to win her back 但我要用她最在意的方式

　　by using what's most important to her. 把她的心赢回来

　　Wheel of fortune"? A good bargain.  财富之轮？想得美

　　You may be living your fancy lifestyle 你可能有着奢侈的生活方式

　　with your ta-tas and your Miatas 你有他她鞋和你的马自达车

　　but what mom cares about most is stretching a dollar. 但妈妈最关心的是精打细算

　　Oh little sister. 噢得了吧，妹妹

　　Just because Steve and I are cushy 就因为史蒂夫和我生活的轻松

　　doesn't mean I can't sniff out a good deal. 并不意味着我看不出来买什么东西合算

　　Designer luggage... 75% off. 比如那个设计师行李箱...二五折

　　When I told mom she almost smiled. 我告诉妈妈的时候，她几乎都会对我笑的

　　Well wait till I show her these silk throw pillows. 好吧，等我给她看看这些绸制枕头

　　off from a condemned hospital. 倒闭医院里打一折，90%

　　Why don't we go shopping see who can find a better deal? 我们为什么不去逛街呢，看看谁能找到更便宜的东西？

　　Well let's take this to the hole... 好啊，我们来比试一下

　　Tammy's fashion hole where they have  Tammy的时尚商店，那里有

　　an unprecedented selection of only left shoes. 一流的清仓鞋

　　What a coincidence. 多巧啊

　　That's my preferred discount shoe. 那是我最喜欢的打折鞋

　　Connie!  康妮

　　Coming ah-ma! 来了，妈妈！

　　Connie and my mom have slipper talk.  康妮和我妈妈要拖鞋夜话

　　Steve has a fancy noise box.  史帝夫带来个聒噪的盒子

　　Yeah it's called Connie. 是的，聒噪的盒子就是康妮

　　We need to step up our game. 我们要提高比赛战斗力

　　Don't worry baby. We got this. 宝贝，别担心，我们赢定了

　　So while this is happening 话说，正好你们来拜访

　　I have a chance to say how excited I am 我也有了机会告诉你明天向你们展示下牧场主的牧场

　　to show you Cattleman's Ranch tomorrow. 对我来说有多么激动难耐

　　It's gonna be a full house. 肯定是座无虚席

　　Well why wait to see this restaurant 好吧，为什么要等等再去见这个我

　　I've heard so much about? 慕名已久的餐厅？

　　I made a reservation for tonight. 我已经预定了今晚

　　Oh well I don't think the restaurant 哦，好吧，我觉得餐厅在这么不充裕的时间里

　　can accommodate on such short notice. 没法给你安排

　　Oh no not a problem. The manager was really nice. 哦，没有，不是问题，经理超好的

　　He said there were plenty of tables. 他说那里有好多空桌

　　Oh. Oh. 哦，哦

　　Howdy. Cattleman's Ranch. 您好，牧场主的牧场餐厅

　　Mitch how many tables are booked for tonight? 米奇，今晚有几桌预定？

　　Uh let's see. Oh just one. 啊，让我看看，哦，就一桌

　　Ooh but it's a big party of 10. 哦，但是是个10人的大单子

　　Okay well there's a change of plans. 好的，那个，计划有变

　　Me and my family are coming in tonight. 我和我家人今晚会去

　　I need you to fill up the restaurant any way you can. 我要你不择手段让餐厅满员

　　You and me? 你和我？

　　Me and my family are the big party of 10! 我和我家人就是那个10个人的大单子！

　　Let's go. Everybody in. Dinner's on Uncle Louis tonight. 我们走，大家进来，今晚晚餐路易斯叔叔买单

　　Do you like my outfit mom? I got a great deal. 妈妈，你喜欢我这套么？这笔买卖超划算

　　Half off on all sport separates. 运动单品全部半折

　　Mom you like my jacket? 妈妈，你喜欢我夹克么？

　　It was 60% and it glows in the dark 这个四折，而且在暗处还好发光

　　so I save money on electricity too. 所以我还省了电费钱

　　Oh hey boss man. 哦，嘿，老板

　　I see you've dropped by for a little impromptu dinner 我看到你和你家人一起

　　with the kinfolk. 路过顺便来吃点即兴的晚餐

　　What's going on? I told you to pack the place. 怎么回事？我告诉过你要让这地方坐满

　　Yeah but I did the best I could. 没错，但是我已经尽力了

　　You gave me very little time. 你给我的时间太短了

　　Gwendolyn and Fritz... Look those are my ex-roommates  格温多林和弗里茨...看，那是我前室友

　　they just came from the renaissance fair... 他们刚从文艺复兴展览会上赶来...

　　Hector and Nancy... they're posing as customers... 赫克托和南希...他们在装客人

　　and Charlene is the date that I'm currently on. 还有沙琳是我最近在约会的妹子

　　This isn't enough people! 人不够！

　　Don't worry about it. 别担心

　　We got that party of 10 coming in.  10个人的大单子就要来了

　　Hey. Light crowd tonight huh Louis? 嘿，今晚有点冷清哈，路易斯？

　　Well this is just the awkward time 好吧，这是老人用餐时间和常人用餐时间

　　between old people dinner and regular dinner so... 之间的不尴不尬时段，所以...

　　To the king! 敬国王！

　　Are you wearing a whole new outfit? 你换了一套全新的衣服？

　　I bought so many affordable items today 我今天买了好多价格实惠的东西

　　I couldn't pick just one. 我都不知道挑啥好

　　Mom this ski suit was 80% off 妈妈，这套滑雪服两折

　　and it came with one pole. 还送了一根滑雪杆哦

　　Tennis mother? 网球，妈妈？

　　85% off.  1.5折

　　Advantage... Connie. 好处...康妮

　　So is uh anyone gonna take our order. 话说，额，有人来给我们点单么

　　Uh... 啊...

　　Welcome to Cattleman's Ranch. 欢迎来到牧场主的牧场

　　Can I start you off with some drinks? 要我给你们上点饮料么？

　　Aren't you a customer? 你不是客人么？

　　So tell me about you. 好了，和我说说你

　　Do you have any brothers or sisters? 你有什么兄弟姐妹么？

　　Uh not anymore. 啊，没了

　　I mean it's not exactly something you talk about 我是说，这不是第一次约会要谈的东西

　　on a first date but for some reason 但是出于某些原因

　　I feel like I can really open up to you. 我觉得我能对你敞开心扉

　　Oh hold on one second. 哦，等我一下

　　Howdy. Cattleman's Ranch. 您好，牧场主的牧场餐厅

　　Yes we do do to-go orders. 是的，我们的确送外卖

　　What's the name? Okay Orenthal... 什么名字？好的，Orenthal...

　　J...  J...

　　Sampson  桑普森

　　Okay. 好的

　　This roll is stupid. 这个面包卷好蠢

　　Dude why are you such a bummer? 兄弟，你为啥这么挑三拣四？

　　What can I say? I grew up. 我能说什么呢？我长大了

　　No you're played out 才不是，你是听那种忧伤的

　　listening to that sad white-lady music. 白人女性的音乐听得毫无精神了

　　Whatever. You're not old 随你怎么说，你还不够成熟到

　　enough to appreciate the emotion of grunge. 去欣赏垃圾摇滚的情感

　　You still got baby ears. 你还是小孩儿的音乐审美

　　Excuse me! Do you accept grain as payment? 不好意思，你们接受拿谷粒付账么？

　　Look mom. Someone died in this. 看，妈妈，有人可想死了这件衣服

　　You know I could have sworn you were a customer. 你知道，我敢发誓你是个客人

　　Uh well 额，好吧

　　You know what we like to do 你知道，我们喜欢

　　is let the finicky diners do the... 让过分挑剔的客人做...

　　uh Jessica help me out here. 啊，杰西卡，帮帮我

　　Oh yes well uh... 哦，是的，好吧，额

　　sorry I wasn't listening. What are we doing? 不好意思，我刚没在听，我们在干啥？

　　I have no idea. So a-am I a waitress again 我不知道，所以，我现在又是个服务员了

　　or am I still pretending to be a customer 还是继续装作是客人

　　or am I... or... 还是...又或者...

　　Whoops. 哎呀

　　I think we can all agree that it's amazing 我觉得大家都同意我撑了这么久

　　that I've lasted this long right? 已经超棒了，对不对？

　　Okay fine. 好吧，好吧

　　The truth is Cattleman's has got off to a shaky start. 事实是，这个餐厅开业不顺

　　I knew it! 我就知道

　　Your fax machine wasn't tired it was bored. 你的传真机不是没电了，是没生意

　　Hey Connie you missed it. 嘿，康妮，你错过了好戏

　　They finally admitted they're failing. 他们终于承认他们失败了

　　Oh I heard. 哦，我听到了

　　That's my tiger shirt! 那是我的虎皮裙！

　　You stole it from my bag! 你从我包里偷的

　　No I found it. 100% off. 不是，我找到的，一毛没花

　　Thanks mom. 谢谢，妈妈

　　Hey boss man I don't know 嘿，妈妈，我不知道

　　if this is a good time to tell you this or not 现在是不是告诉你的好时机

　　but I think that table of 10 is a no-show so... 但是我觉得那个10个人的大单子不来了，所以...

　　Last night was a disaster. 昨晚真是一败涂地

　　I don't want to leave this room. 我不想出这个房间门

　　Now that is a success perm. 现在，那个才是成功的卷毛

　　I'm so tired. 我好累啊

　　Nobody could have slept worse than we did. 没人比我们睡得更差了

　　Mm. 嗯

　　So is anybody gonna talk about aunt Connie's boobs? 话说，有人要聊聊康妮阿姨的大胸么？

　　Aah! She heard me! 啊，她听到我说话了！

　　I was just looking for some sugar. 我只是在找点糖

　　What are you boys doing in here? 你们在这里干嘛？

　　They're there because we don't have enough bedrooms. 他们呆在那里，因为卧室不够

　　Are you happy? 你高兴了？

　　Cattleman's Ranch is not doing well our house is small 牧场主家的牧场生意不好，我们的房子小的很

　　and you're mom's favorite... you win. 而老妈最爱你...你赢了

　　Jessica. 杰西卡

　　I know how you feel. 我明白你的感受

　　But you'll get used to being mom's least favorite daughter. 但你很快就会习惯当妈最不爱的女儿的

　　I did. 我已经习惯了

　　It was not so bad for you. 其实你也没那么糟

　　The only pictures she had in her wallet 她钱包里唯一的两张照片

　　were of you and Kurt Russell. 就是你和库特·拉塞尔的

　　You saw inside her wallet? I didn't think it opened. 你居然能看到她钱包里的东西？我就从没见它打开过

　　I have to say... 不得不说...

　　I never knew being the favorite was so hard. 我从来不知道当老妈的最爱这么辛苦

　　It takes a lot of patience. 实在是太需要耐心了

　　I know. 我懂

　　When you watch "Wheel" 当你看“Wheel”的时候

　　does she still yell at the TV screen 她是不是还在对着屏幕里

　　when someone buys a vowel? 那个刚买了毛巾的家伙大叫?

　　"Vowels are a waste of money!"  “买毛巾就是浪费钱！”

　　Josephine's missing! 我的爱车约瑟芬不见了！

　　Who? 谁？

　　My Miata! Someone snatched Josie! 我的马自达！有人把小约瑟绑架了！

　　Why aren't you freaking out?! 你们怎么这么淡定？！

　　Aah! 啊！

　　Yeah officer you need to have all units looking for my car. 是的，警官，你找遍所有单元也得把我的车找出来

　　It's a brand-new 1995 miata. 那可是一辆全新的1995年产的马自达

　　Sir you said the color of your car is British-racing green? 先生，你说你的车是英国赛车绿（墨绿色）的？

　　Yes. 嗯

　　They discontinued British-racing green in the '95 model.  1995英国赛车绿款还没生产呢

　　The last year the brg was available was in the '93. 去年最新英车绿款的还是1993年产的

　　It's used! I knew it! 居然是二手的！我就知道!

　　Guess that alarm was fake too. 我猜警报声也是假的吧

　　"Whoop-whoop" My ass!  “呜-呜”切！

　　No no no. I-I-I-I got a special edition... 不，不，不，我-我-我-我，买的是特定版的

　　Sir I've got two passions in life... 先生，我一生只对两件事感兴趣...

　　law enforcement and japanese sports coupes. 执法，还有日本的运动跑车

　　That's right. 当然

　　I too am a proud gay man and Miata enthusiast. 我也为我对马自达的狂热感到自豪又开心

　　Oh here we go. 哦，找到了

　　Says a repo order was issued for that car. 这里说有人回购了那辆车

　　Apparently the owner is way behind in payments. 很显然车主要付的钱还差得远呐

　　Steve? 史蒂夫？

　　Okay so I took out a few loans to pay back some other loans. 好吧，我申请了几个贷款来偿还之前的贷款

　　We're in debt and you didn't tell me? 我们负债这么多，你竟然瞒着我？

　　I thought we were cushy. 我还以为我们闲钱很多

　　We are cushy! 我们的确闲钱很多！

　　We're just a little low on cashola! 我们只是资金有一点点紧张而已！

　　Are we poor?! 我们没钱了？！

　　Are they gonna take away my stuff?! 会有人把我的东西抢走吗？！

　　I like my stuff! 我舍不得我的东西！

　　Yo. 哟

　　Well probably should have hung up already 额，我或许早该挂电话了

　　but I didn't so I heard all that. 但是我没有，所以我都听到了

　　I'll mail you some literature 我会给你寄点

　　about the Miata queens of Orlando. 关于奥兰多地区马自达情报的东西

　　We meet every other month but whatever. 我们每隔一个月就会见面，但无所谓了

　　You'll read about it. 你会读到的

　　What's going on? 怎么了？

　　These two were fast asleep 这俩个小家伙

　　in the backseat of a Miata I repo'd. 在我回购的马自达车后座睡着了

　　It was more comfortable than the pantry. 比食品储藏室舒服多了

　　Uh of course! 啊，没错！

　　My boys I was so worried about and knew were gone! 我发现他们不见了，真是担心死他们了!

　　Thank you for not repo'ing my children. 谢谢你没把我的孩子们回购走

　　No problem. Comes with the job. Mm.  不用谢，工作需要嘛，嗯

　　As well as dibs on anything we find in the cars. 还在车里找到了一点福利

　　Mm. 嗯

　　Hello juice. 嗨，juice

　　You know for the record 你知道吗，看记录时

　　that dealer told me that Miata was new. 卖家告诉我那辆是全新的

　　Well people lie. 呃，人人都会说谎

　　Sometimes even to themselves. 有时连他们自己都骗

　　Hey don't worry okay? 嘿，别担心了，好不？

　　I won't tell the family about any of this. 我不会告诉家里任何人的

　　I know business has its ups and downs. 我知道得失乃经商之常态

　　You'll get back on your feet. 你能挺过来的

　　I appreciate it Louis. 谢谢，路易斯

　　You know... 你知道吗...

　　I got to say 不得不说

　　it'd be a lot easier if I still had my best salesman. 如果我最好的那个店员还在的话，情况会好的多

　　Hey if you ever need any advice 嘿，要是你需要建议的话

　　just give me a call okay? 尽管给我打电话，好吗？

　　Just not on my dedicated fax line 只要别打我那个专用传真线路就行

　　'cause that's just for faxes. 因为它仅限于传真，

　　Oh. 噢

　　There we go. 戴好

　　Sorry I got a little upset before. 抱歉我之前有点失态了

　　Guess I just got caught up in the emotion of the moment. 可能是我当时有点小伤感

　　Really? 真的吗？

　　'Cause to me it looked like you were straight-up crying. 因为在我看来你就是在哭

　　But maybe my baby ears didn't hear it right. 不过也可能是我听错了

　　You guys want to listen to some 2Pac? 你们想听图派克的歌吗？

　　Really? We can listen with you? 真的吗？我们能和你一起听？

　　Mm. I'll go get some sunny d and raisins. 嗯，我去拿点小零食和葡萄干

　　I'll get our toothbrushes for after. 那我去把我们的牙刷拿来待会用

　　Well I can't wait to get out of this swampland. 我实在在这个沼泽地里呆不下去了

　　Well nothing's stopping you. 呃，又没有谁拦着你

　　By the way your hair looks terrible. 顺便说一句，你发型太难看了

　　And your boobs are way too big. 你的胸也太大了

　　Have a safe drive mom. 一路平安，妈

　　Well she's coming around. 看来她还会造访了

　　Connie! Coming ah-ma.  康妮！来了，阿妈

　　We all took something away from that trip. 我们在那次旅途中都解决了一些东西

　　Except grandma who set something loose. 除了外婆，惹起了新的东西

　　And in the process we learned that just like O.J. 而在那个过程中我们也明白了就像O.J.一样

　　people weren't always what they see. 人们并不都是他们看起来那样

　　I can't believe it. 难以置信

　　We won. Yes we did.  我们赢了，对，我们做到了

　　We finally proved this Miata was used. 我们终于证明了那是辆二手马自达

　　And we are always honest with each other. 我们一直对对方很坦诚

　　We are the most successful couple. 我们是最成功的夫妻了

　　You realize we are swimming in dept too? 你有意识到我们也泥菩萨过江了吗？

　　Yes but we are swimming together. 嗯，但是我们一起在过江

　　Oh man. Come on. 噢，天，要不要这样

　　That one was gross. 太肉麻了