You've been chewing that piece for six minutes. 你这口已经嚼了六分钟了

　　Eddie! What happened?! 埃迪，怎么了

　　I don't know. I was just making a Pop-Tart bagel sandwich. 我不知道，我刚只是在做馅饼贝果三明治

　　The Pop-Tarts were the bread, and the bagel was the meat. 贝果放在中间，馅饼加在外面

　　Can somebody in this family 这家里还能不能有人

　　just have a normal breakfast? 吃顿正常的早餐了

　　Bite of jackfruit? 想尝一口菠萝蜜吗

　　No, thank you. 不用，谢了

　　That toaster was on its way out. We need new one, anyway. 不过那个面包机本来也快报废了，我们也要买个新的了

　　Yes! Are we going to Sears? 太棒了，我们要去西尔斯百货了吗

　　They have the best men's fragrance section. 那里有最棒的男士香水区

　　No, we'll just go to the bank. 不，我们只会去银行

　　They give you a free toaster when you open a new account. 在那儿开个账户，就会拿到一个免费的面包机

　　But we both already have accounts. 但我俩都已经有账户了

　　So we'll get one of the boys a new account. 那我们就帮咱们家其中一个小子开一个吧

　　It's funny. You never know when the moment 有趣，人们永远无法知道自己期盼已久的愿望

　　you've been waiting for will finally arrive. 会什么时候实现

　　FDIC-insured, here I come. 联邦存款，为了实现愿望的保险公司

　　Okay. So, Evan, we'll open you 好吧，埃文，我们就决定给你

　　a free-toaster checking account. 开一个可以换免费面包机的活期存款

　　Yo, where did you get all that cash? 哟，你从哪儿得来这么多的钱啊

　　I haven't bought candy in three years. 我三年都没买糖了

　　That's why you're my favorite. I know. 果然是我最爱的孩子，我懂

　　Let's do some banking. 开始交易吧

　　Why do we all have to be here? 为啥我们大家要一起来

　　'Cause we're a family. We do things together. 因为我们是一家人啊，我们做事当然要一起呀

　　Remember when we all went to buy your basketball? 还记得那天我们一起去给你买篮球吗

　　That was a long day. 那真是漫长的一天啊

　　Each one has its own signature bounce. 每个球的弹性都各有不同

　　I'll be signing my first official documents. 我就要签我人生中第一份正式的协议了

　　I've been practicing all morning. 我已经练了一早上了

　　Evan. 埃文

　　It just flows. I'm so glad it's my name. 我的名字写起来太顺了，是我喜欢的风格

　　It really suits you. It does, doesn't it?  和你的风格很配呢，确实，不是吗

　　It's perfect for me. 和我简直不能更搭

　　Which is good 'cause it was totally random. 那太好了，反正我们当时也是随便取的

　　What do you mean? 什么意思

　　Well, both of your brothers had "E" Names, 额，你两个哥哥的名字都是以“埃”开头的

　　so we knew we wanted yours to start with "E," Too. 所以我们决定你的名字也应该以“埃”开头

　　We were at the hospital, and there it was on a name tag... 我们当时在医院，看到一个名牌，上面写着

　　Nurse Evans. What? 护士埃文斯，什么

　　She was the nurse who delivered you. 她就是给你接生的护士

　　Uh, no, she was the nurse who checked us out. 噢不，她是给我们办出院的那个护士

　　Doesn't matter... We know she wasn't the doctor. 无所谓啦，反正我们知道她不是医生就对了

　　Hi there. I'm Frank. How can I help you folks? 嗨，我叫弗兰克，有什么可以帮您的吗

　　We're going to be opening him a free-toaster account. 我们想给他开个账户，能送免费面包机的那种

　　Ah, our most popular account. Right this way. 噢，我们最受欢迎的账户类型，这边请

　　You brought along the whole crew, huh? 你把一家子都带过来了哈

　　Apparently, that's how we do it, Frank. 很显然，这就是我们家风格，弗兰克

　　So, what is the lucky new account holder's name? 那么，要开户的这个幸运儿叫什么名字呀

　　His name is Nurse Evans. 他叫护士埃文斯

　　My name is random? 我名字真的是随便取的吗

　　I thought you picked "Evan" Just for me. 我以为“埃文”是你们专门为我挑的呢

　　I thought you looked into my little baby eyes 我以为当你们一看到我婴儿时的小眼睛

　　and knew I was an Evan. 就立马知道该叫我“埃文”呢

　　But I could have been anything. 但现在看起来我叫什么都可以

　　It's not a big deal. Names are meaningless. 这不重要好吗，名字是没有含义的

　　Did I ever tell you the story of how I got my name? 我有告诉过你我的名字怎么来的吗

　　Me and my family had just moved to the U.S. 那时我和我的家人刚搬到美国

　　Lord, I was born a ramblin' man 主啊，我生来就是个漫游者

　　Your parents must be so proud. 你爸妈一定很骄傲

　　Hi, sister. 嗨，好姐妹

　　Nice robe. 这长袍不错

　　Whose name is that? 那是谁的名字

　　I decided my American name is going to be... Connie. 我决定我的英文名要叫...康妮

　　Well, I'm going to keep my Chinese name. 好吧，我还是继续用我的中文名

　　I respect your choice. 我尊重你的选择

　　I was starting my freshman year at Maryland. 那是我刚进马里兰大学的第一年

　　Welcome to freshman orientation. 欢迎来到新生报到会

　　Let's go around the room, and everyone introduce themselves. 我们顺着教室从头到尾，一个个地来做自我介绍吧

　　Hi, I'm Honey St. Claire. 嗨，我叫哈妮·圣克莱尔

　　Wait a second. 等等

　　Honey, Marvin, and Deidre didn't go to college with you. 哈妮，马文和迪雅卓没和你一起上大学啊

　　Whatever, it doesn't matter. All white people look the same. 无所谓，这不是重点，反正白人都长一个样

　　Hello. I'm Chu Tsai Hsia. 大家好，我叫朱彩霞

　　Choo Tie Sa? Chu Tsai Hsia. 猪太傻？朱彩霞

　　Choo Sigh Ta. Chu Tsai Hsia. 醋太差，朱彩霞

　　Choo Tie Chi-ah? 煮太迟，吗

　　Chu... What does it mean?  朱... 这名字什么意思

　　Colorful sunset glow. 绚烂的夕阳晚霞

　　That is beautiful. 真美

　　Maybe we can call you "Glow," Which everyone can pronounce. 要不我们就叫你“光辉”好了，这样比较好念

　　But that's not my name. 但这不是我的名字啊

　　Hey, a nickname's a great idea, though. 嘿，取个昵称也不错啊

　　I don't want to brag, but I'm the official 不是我吹牛，我可是我们曲棍球队

　　nickname giver on my lacrosse team. 公认的“取昵称小能手”

　　That's okay. I wanted... How about, uh, Mitsy?  不用了，我就想... 要不就，额，米琪

　　Koko? Skags? 可可，洛洛

　　Moose. Moose. 鹿鹿，鹿鹿

　　Yeah, Moose, huh? 对吧，鹿鹿，怎么样

　　That guy never stopped giving me nicknames. 之后那家伙再也没停止过给我取外号

　　Skooter, Toto, Bubba. 斯科特，托托，布巴

　　But I wanted to keep my Chinese name. 但我就想继续用我的中文名

　　So, how did you get the name Jessica. 那，杰西卡这名字是怎么来的呢

　　Because of something that happened 那是因为在一节商业课上

　　in one of my business classes. 发生的一件事

　　So, today, we're gonna be talking about... 那今天呢，我们要讲讲

　　Butt Juice? 烟屁股果汁

　　Actually, it's pronounced Butte Juice with a long "U." 准确的说，应该念“岩皮谷”别弄错声调了

　　Named after the town it was produced in... Butte, Montana. 名字是根据它的产地取的，蒙大拿州的“岩皮谷”

　　Looks like Butt Juice to me. 我觉得和烟屁股果汁没啥区别

　　And you're making my point for me. 你说到点子上了

　　Butte Juice was almost a failure 岩皮谷果汁的生意很惨淡

　　because outside Montana, people pronounced it wrong. 因为除了蒙大拿州的人，大家都会把它的名字读错

　　Luckily someone had the foresight to change it, 幸运的是，一个有远见的人改掉了这个名字

　　and they turned the company around. 于是公司开始好转了起来

　　Can anyone tell me what Butte Juice became? 有人知道岩皮谷果汁现在的名字吗

　　Carol-Joan? 卡萝尔·琼

　　Uh... Tab? 额，太步吗（美国一饮料品牌）

　　Close. 接近了

　　Butte Juice became the fruit drink sensation known as...Geyser Mist. Huh. 岩皮谷果汁成为了果汁行业的龙头品牌，它叫泉雾（美国一饮料品牌）

　　And what business principle does this illustrate? 这个故事说明了一个什么商业道理呢

　　Honey? Are we in? Did we start? 哈妮，已经开始上课了吗

　　That's right... branding. 没错，品牌化

　　Now, branding is a key component... 品牌化是重要性体现在

　　Excuse me? Professor Roberts? 打扰一下，罗伯特教授

　　Why do you never call on me? 你为什么从来不点我

　　Well, it's a big class. I probably just didn't see you. 额，这个班很大，我可能只是没看见你吧

　　I sit in the front. 我坐在前排啊

　　Today you called on sleepy Honey all the way in the back. 你今天甚至都点了在一直在后排打瞌睡的哈妮

　　Okay, the truth is, I can't pronounce your name. 好吧，事实是，我不会念你的名字

　　You can learn how to pronounce it. 你可以学着念啊

　　Are you really gonna have 你打算以后和遇见的每个人

　　this conversation with everyone you meet? 都重复一遍这段对话吗

　　With everyone who reads you resume? 尤其是那些看你简历的人

　　It's my name. People should learn how to say it. 这是我的名字啊，其他人应该学着怎么念

　　Yes, but they probably won't. It's like Butte Juice. 没错，但他们根本懒得学，就像岩皮谷果汁一样

　　It was always delicious, 它一直都很好喝

　　but people didn't know that till it became Geyser Mist. 但在改名叫泉雾之前根本没人知道这点

　　It was the same drink. 饮料并没有变

　　It just went by a different name. 变的只是名字而已

　　That's what made it successful. 这就是它成功的秘诀

　　That is so funny. I don't know about you guys, 太有意思了，我不知道你们怎么想的

　　but I'd drink the heck out of some Butt Juice. 反正打死我也不会再喝什么烟屁股果汁了

　　That professor was a jerk, but he had a point. 那个教授是个混蛋，不过他说的有道理

　　Why was I being stubborn 我干嘛要那么固执

　　and making it harder than it already was in a new country? 让异国他乡的生活难上加难呢

　　I wasn't losing my identity. 我还是我

　　I still had my Chinese name, but by giving myself 我的中文名字没有变

　　a name that was easier for people pronounce, 但因为取了一个大家都会念的名字

　　I was opening the door to more opportunity. 我获得了更多的机会

　　So, can anyone tell me 所以，有人知道

　　the benefit for above-competition pricing 对于一个想要进入市场的产品来说

　　for a product looking to break into the marketplace? 高於市场价格订价法的优势吗

　　Yes? Bob? "Bob"? 嗯，鲍勃，“鲍勃”

　　It was my favorite haircut. 那是我最喜欢的发型名

　　I didn't realize it was also the most popular male name. 后来我才知道它也是最受欢迎的男生名字

　　I changed it after a week. 一周后我就把它改掉了

　　You still haven't told us how you got the name Jessica. 你还是没有告诉我们杰西卡这个名字怎么来的

　　Oh, from the Allman Brothers song "Jessica." 喔，是来自奥尔曼兄弟乐队的歌《杰西卡》

　　You know I love country jam-rock instrumentals. 你知道我喜欢牙买加乡村风的音乐

　　Uh, Jessica, I think if you were trying to convince Evan 额，杰西卡，我觉得如果你是想要

　　that names aren't a big deal, 告诉埃文名字并不重要的话

　　that maybe wasn't the best story. 这个例子好像不太合适吧

　　No, it wasn't. 确实

　　Deciding what name to sign 看来决定要签什么名字

　　is even more important than I thought. 的确比我之前想的更重要

　　I mean, should I use my Chinese name, Chih Fu? 我是说，该不该用我的中文名“赤福”呢

　　Shoo Foo? Chih Fu. Seafood? 叔父？赤福，师父？

　　Yes, Frank, that's my name... Seafood. 没错，弗兰克，我就叫...师父

　　We don't have time for this. 我们可没时间扯这个

　　My name is about to be officially entered into record. 我的名字就要被记录在官方档案里了

　　Do I use my American nurse name 我是该用那个美国护士英文名呢

　　or my Chinese name that will cause me endless struggle? 还是用会惹来无尽麻烦的中文名呢

　　Hey! Do you know her? 嘿，你们认识她吗

　　No. O-kay. 不认识，好...吧

　　I'm just gonna leave this form here while you decide 你们可以继续讨论用什么名字开户

　　what name you want to open the account under. 我先把表格放这儿了

　　"Sure, Lauren, I'll take your shift. “好的，劳伦，我帮你代班好了”

　　Nothing much happens at the bank on a Saturday." “反正星期六的银行也没什么工作”

　　I only practiced signing Evan Huang, 我只练习了怎么签“埃文·黄”

　　so maybe I stick with that. 所以也许我还是该签那个

　　Or do I go with Chih Fu Huang? 或者还是该签黄赤福

　　But cursive F's are so hard. 但是用草书写“福”也太难了

　　Dude, we're just trying to get a toaster. 亲，我们来只是想弄个面包机而已

　　So they picked the name Evan at random? So what? 他们是随便给你取了个埃文的名字，但那又如何

　　Eddie and Emery's names were just as random. 埃迪和埃默里这两个名字也是随便取的啊

　　It's true. I thought of Emery's name 对啊，我想到埃默里这个名字

　　while I was filing my nails on an emery board. 还是在我用指甲锉磨指甲的时候呢

　　I have chills. 我都起鸡皮疙瘩了

　　And Eddie was named after the child villain 埃迪还是以童话《狮子·女巫·魔衣橱》

　　in "The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe," 里面那个为了一些土耳其软糖

　　who betrayed his siblings for some Turkish delight. 背叛兄弟姐妹的人命名的呢

　　I don't know what Turkish delight is, but I'd do it again. 我不知道土耳其软糖是什么，但我绝对会再背叛你们一次的

　　They're not the ones about to sign their name 他们又不用签人生第一份

　　to their first official document for all of time. 将要伴随一身的官方文件

　　You want to know how unimportant and random the name Louis is? 你想知道路易斯这个名字起得有多么简单随意吗

　　Basically, I loved Lou Ferrigno and the Incredible Hulk. 主要是，我喜欢卢·弗里基诺和他演的绿巨人浩克

　　Stay angry, Lou! 保持愤怒，卢

　　Lou, Louis. Simple as that. 卢，路易斯，就那么简单

　　Okay, yeah. That does make me feel a little better. 好吧，这确实让我好受一点儿

　　But wait. You hate the Incredible Hulk. 等等，你不是讨厌绿巨人的吗

　　No, I don't. Yeah, you do.  不，我不讨厌，是，你就是讨厌

　　Remember? I was trying to buy that comic book, 记得么，那次我想买那本漫画

　　and you said he was the worst superhero ever 但你说他是最烂的超级英雄

　　because all he does is get mad. 因为他所能做的就只有愤怒

　　You said, "That's not superpower. 你说，那不是超级英雄

　　That's a character flaw." 那是性格缺陷

　　Eddie, I'm just trying to make your brother feel better 埃迪，我只是想用一个简单的故事来描述我名字的由来

　　with a simple story of how I got my name. 以此让你弟弟感觉好受一点儿

　　Wait. Is that not the real story? No. 等等，那个故事不是真的么？不是

　　The real story is more complicated. 真实的故事要更复杂

　　It was 1981. 那是在1981年

　　I just arrived in the States, 我刚到美国

　　and I didn't know how anything worked. 什么都不知道

　　I answered a roommate ad, which is how I met your uncle Barry, 我回复了一个招合租广告，就这样认识了你的叔叔巴瑞

　　who got me a job as a busboy in a diner. 他给我介绍了一份在餐厅当招待的工作

　　Hey, Hong. It's Huang.  嗨，洪，是黄

　　Hong, Huang, it don't matter. 洪，黄，差不多啦

　　It is important to make clear 我要强调一点

　　that Barry is no one in this family's uncle. 咱们家的亲戚里可没有巴瑞叔叔这个人

　　He's a bum. Continue. 他是个流浪汉，继续说

　　I'm gonna give you some of Barry's secrets of the trade. 我要给你透露几个巴瑞的商业小秘诀

　　When I walk around and I see French fries 当我走在餐厅里看到没拆开吃过的薯条

　　uneaten and untouched, I put them in a little baggie 我就把它们装进小塑料袋里

　　and put them back in my bin. 然后放到我储藏柜里去

　　When I get home, I put them on a plate with my regular food. 等我回到家，就把它们和我每天吃的饭放在一起

　　Mm! Smart. 嗯，真聪明

　　Hey, uh, Barry? Who's that guy? 嘿，巴瑞，那人是谁

　　He looks like a gangster. 他看起来像个大佬

　　He's a gangster, all right. 没错，他就是个大佬

　　That's Louis. He owns the aquarium. 他叫路易斯，他是开水族馆的

　　He's what we call a fish boss. 他就是我们说的那个鱼佬

　　Fish boss? 鱼佬

　　Bloop, bloop, bloop. Bloop, bloop, bloop. 卜噜，卜噜，卜噜，卜噜，卜噜，卜噜

　　Yeah. What is that... Bloop, bloop? 是的，卜噜卜噜是什么意思

　　Oh, that's the bubbles coming... 啊，那是吐出的泡泡

　　Fish, water. I-I get it, I get it. I get it.  鱼和水，我明白了，明白了

　　He looks like he has it all figured out. 他看起来像是什么都懂的样子

　　He hasn't figured out how refill his own water. 他可不知道怎么给自己的杯子续水

　　Go get him. 快去

　　Uh, more water? 呃，需要再来点儿水吗

　　Water? Water?! I got plenty of water, kid. 水，我有很多水，孩子

　　I traffic in water. 我就是干这行的

　　But, yeah, I'll take some water. 不过，好吧，给我再来点儿水

　　That guy had it together. He even ordered cool. 那个人好酷，他甚至点了冰水

　　"Patty melt... Real cheesy." “牛肉饼，珍味奶酪”

　　Onions or no onions? Extra onions. 加洋葱的吗？超大份洋葱

　　Emery gets it. 埃默里懂了

　　So, I borrowed his style. 所以我借用了他的风格

　　Changing my look gave me confidence and swagger. 穿着打扮的改变让我变得自信昂扬

　　It made me feel like I was gonna be okay here. 让我打心底觉得我能在这里很好地过下去

　　How great is this? 很棒对不对

　　All you-can-eat seafood medley for $4.99. 只要4.99美元，你就能吃到所有你想要的海鲜

　　I'm never leaving. 我要在这吃一辈子

　　Does you food have a metallic aftertaste? 你有没有觉得这里的食物有一股金属味

　　I don't know. I'm eating so fast, I can't taste it. 我不知道，我吃得太快了，根本没尝到味道

　　Would guys like some more water? 你们想再来点儿水么

　　I got plenty of water, kid. 我有很多水了，孩子

　　Oh, my gosh. I don't what I'm gonna do with myself here. 啊我的天哪，我完全不知道在这儿该干啥了

　　I'm in heaven. Ugh. 这里是天堂吧，啊

　　This octopus po' boy is not sitting well. 这个章鱼仔热狗好像坏了

　　I'll be back. 我先去趟厕所

　　Apparently, the medley had taken down half the restaurant, 显然，这堆海鲜混炖搞垮了半个餐馆的人

　　and they only had one unisex bathroom. 然而他们只有一个男女共用的厕所

　　I was finally on deck 当马上就要轮到我的时候

　　when I saw the prettiest girl I'd ever seen. 我遇到了这辈子见过的最漂亮的女孩儿

　　Uh, you, uh, eat the po' boy, too? 呃，你，也吃了那个海鲜热狗吗

　　And some shrimpy nuggets. 还有一些虾球

　　Ohh...You, uh, like nuggets, woman? 哦...女士，你，额，喜欢那些虾球

　　I know a great nugget spot... 我知道一个很棒的吃虾球的地方

　　Can I cut in front of you? 我能插到你前面去么

　　Ooh, that's a big ask. 哦，真是一个让人为难的请求

　　Here's an even bigger one. 但是这还有一个更难的

　　You, me, nuggets, Saturday. 你，我，去吃虾球，这个周六

　　I think there's been a misunderstanding. 你好像误会我了

　　I don't like nuggets. 我不喜欢虾球

　　That's fine. 没关系

　　Never nuggets or no nuggets now? 你是以后都不想吃还是只是现在不吃

　　I'll give you my number. 我会给你我的电话号码

　　On the way out. Okay. 我快憋不住了，好吧

　　I'll be here. 我在这儿等你

　　What's your name? 你叫什么名字

　　Louis. 路易斯

　　I'm Jessica. 我是杰西卡

　　Oh...Jessica... 啊哦，杰西卡

　　Isn't it amazing? 很令人惊讶不是么

　　That restaurant is still open. 那家餐馆现在还没倒闭

　　Shocking. 厉害

　　Anyway, that was the first time I ever used my name. 总之，那是我第一次用现在的这个名字

　　And now that your mom knew me as Louis, 既然我是以路易斯的名字认识的你妈妈

　　I didn't want to be known as anything else. 我就不想再用其他名字来代表自己了

　　Sounds like the opposite of unimportant and random to me, Louis. 在我听来，这个故事和简单随意地取名字正好相反啊 路易斯

　　Was that it? 然后呢

　　You never saw the aquarium gangster again? 你再也没见过那个水族馆大佬了吗

　　Oh, I saw him again. 噢，我又见到过他一次

　　I ate the shells. What?! 我吃光了贝类，什么

　　You're the busboy from the diner. 你是那个餐厅的招待

　　You copied my look. 你抄袭了我的风格

　　No, I didn't. 不，我没有

　　What's your name? 你叫什么

　　My name? Oh. Louis. 我的名字么，呃，路易斯

　　That's my name. There's only room for one Louis around here. 那是我的名字，这附近只能有一个路易斯存在

　　Look, I'm sorry, 哦，抱歉

　　but I just told a beautiful woman with food poisoning 但是我才告诉一个吃坏肚子的漂亮女孩

　　that Louis is my name, 路易斯是我的名字

　　and I'm not gonna have her think I'm a liar. 我不想让她认为我是个骗子

　　Oh. Uh... Barry? Uh, Barry? Barry. 噢，噢，巴瑞？呃，巴瑞？巴瑞

　　So we decided to fight for the name. 所以我们决定为了名字打一架

　　Damn, bro! What are those? Tentacles? 该死的，兄弟，那些是啥，触手么

　　Guess I didn't get all the octopus out. 可能是我刚才没把章鱼仔拉干净

　　That's disgusting. And I work at an aquarium. 真恶心，我在水族馆工作

　　Well, I work in... 好吧，我在

　　Ugh! Ugh. 呕

　　Take the name. You can have it. I don't want it. 你就叫这名吧，我不想要这名字了

　　Nasty. 真恶心

　　You've always been an intense vomiter. 你总是吐来吐去的

　　Remember that time you ate that entire gingerbread house? 你还记得那次你吃掉一整个姜饼屋吗

　　Those gumdrops came out like bullets. 那些橡皮糖像子弹一样喷了出来

　　Okay. You decide who you are yet? 好吧，你决定好了叫什么了吗

　　No. Mom chose the name Jessica, and it changed her life. 不，妈妈选择了杰西卡这个名字，改变了她的一生

　　Dad chose the name Louis, and it changed his life. 爸爸选择了路易斯这个名字，也改变了他的人生

　　What I choose today could change my life. 今天我选择的名字也将改变我的命运

　　What if I told you there was a third option? 假如我说你还有第三种选择呢

　　Is the third option 你说的第三种选择是

　　going to a store and just buying a toaster? 去商店直接买一个烤面包机回来吗

　　So, what's the third option? 那，第三种选择是什么

　　Little bro, you can have the name your parents give you, 小弟，你可以用你爸妈给你取的名字

　　the name the culture gives you, 传统文化赋予你的名字

　　or the name the streets give you. 或者是你的街头艺名

　　Meadowridge Lane? 梅多里奇路

　　No, not the name of your street. 不，不是你住的街道名

　　Your name from the streets. 是你在街头上的绰号

　　Calvin Broadus became Snoop Dogg. 卡尔文·布罗德斯的艺名是史努比狗狗

　　O'Shea Jackson became Ice Cube. 奥谢拉·杰克逊的艺名是艾斯·库伯

　　Reginald Dwight became Elton John. 瑞吉纳德·德怀特的艺名是艾尔顿·约翰

　　That's what I'm gonna do. 这就是我要做的

　　When I take over multiple industries 等我接管了多家企业

　　and become a business mogul, 变成了一个商业大亨

　　I'm gonna earn myself a dope-ass name. 我也要为自己赢得一个酷炫的名字

　　There is no world, real or imaginary, 不管是在现实还是在你的想象里

　　where you will ever have a face tattoo. 脸部纹身永远不可能存在

　　Topaz, your Pop-Tagel is ready. 黄玉，您的波普果馅饼百吉圈三明治好了

　　The bagel is the meat. 把百吉圈夹在中间

　　Also, the President is on the line for you. 还有，总统先生在等着与您通话

　　'Sup, President Shaq? 怎么了，大鲨鱼总统

　　Topaz, I'm calling to thank you. 黄玉，我打电话来是来道谢的

　　When you promised me Army uniforms 当你向我保证军队制服

　　that not only could the soldiers fight in 不仅能让士兵穿上作战

　　but also dance in, I was skeptical, 还能让他们穿上跳舞时，我是怀疑的

　　but you delivered. 但是你做到了

　　Got the idea when I dropped my G.I. Joe into some crayons. 我是从我掉进蜡笔堆的特种兵模型的身上获得的灵感

　　We still on for golf Wednesday? 我们周三还去打高尔夫吗

　　You know it. Is Vice President Barkley coming? 你懂得，巴克利副总统也会来吗

　　Of course... Somebody got to carry the bags. 当然，总要有人给我们拎包

　　Ohhhh! Ohhhh!  噢，噢

　　Sorry about the interruption. What were you saying again? 不好意思打断了你，你要说什么来着

　　I said I really wasn't feeling too good 我说，对于你想让我在月球上

　　about this concert that you want me to do for you on the moon. 为你举行演唱会的这个想法，我不是很赞同

　　They ain't got no air up there, bro. 月球上根本没有空气啊，哥们

　　Listen to me, Busta Rhymes. 你听我说，布斯塔·莱姆斯

　　People expect greatness from Topaz Industries. 人们对黄玉公司的期望很大

　　That's what my name means, and that's what I expect from you. 这是我名字的意义所在，这也是我希望你能做到的

　　When my father died after swallowing all those buttons, 当我的父亲被纽扣噎死之后

　　I didn't take over his steakhouse and turn it into 我没有继承他的牧场餐厅，而是把它变成了首个

　　the number-one hip-hop label/ clothing line/multimedia empire 集嘻哈，服饰，多媒体于一体的企业帝国

　　to play it safe. 小心经营

　　They ain't got no air up there! None! 但是月球上没有空气，一点也没有

　　How I'm supposed to rap with a helmet on? 我要怎么带着头盔说唱

　　Where all this dread gonna go? 这些问题怎么办

　　I'll design the helmet. You just write the songs. 我会亲自设计头盔的，你只需要安心写歌就行了

　　Okay. 好吧

　　Topaz? Really? 黄玉，你是认真的吗

　　It's my birthstone, dawg. 那是我的诞生石，伙计

　　It's the worst stone. 那是最糟糕的石头

　　It really is. 的确是

　　I died from swallowing buttons? 我被纽扣噎死

　　None of your stories have been any help, 你们的故事没有一个能帮上忙的

　　especially not yours, Topaz. 特别是你的故事，黄玉

　　Hey, I don't care what y'all say... 嘿，我才不在乎你们怎么说

　　That name is hella cool. 这个名字酷毙了

　　I need to go splash some water on my face, clear my head. 我要去洗把脸，清醒一下头脑

　　"Moon Rock Festival." 月球摇滚音乐节

　　What? 你说什么

　　You could call it the Moon Rock Festival... 你可以叫它月球摇滚音乐节

　　If you have a concert on the moon. 如果你要在月球上开演唱会

　　Hmm. 嗯哼

　　Oh, sorry. The door wasn't... 噢，抱歉，厕所门没有

　　You probably think I should use my Chinese name. 你可能觉得我应该用我的中文名

　　Let me guess... You have a long, unhelpful story 我猜，你也有一个又臭又长又没用的

　　about how you chose your name. 关于自己名字由来的故事吧

　　So, what do you think I should do? 那么，你觉得我应该怎么做呢

　　Thanks, Grandma. 谢谢你，外婆

　　Yeah, so, our insurance actually isn't too bad here. 是的，所以，我们银行的保险实际上也不算差

　　You know, they cover six doctor's visits a year, 你懂得，保险涵盖了每年六次的医生检查

　　plus the colonoscopy that I was supposed to have today 再加上我本来应该今天去做但却不得不改期的

　　and had to reschedule, even though I drank 结肠镜检查，即使我为此已经喝了

　　all that magnesium. I've made my decision.  那么多的镁了，我已经做好决定了

　　Oh. Finally.  噢，终于

　　Thank God. I'm dying!  谢天谢地，我都快等崩溃了

　　Congrats. Mnh-mnh. 恭喜了，嗯嗯

　　Look at it... even the temporary checks are beautiful. 看看，即使是临时支票都这么完美

　　I definitely saw that coming. Me too.  我已经预见了这个画面，我也是

　　Here, Mom. Use this to buy a new one. 给你，妈妈，用这张支票去买一个新的烤面包机吧

　　It's my treat. I wrote "Toast" In the memo. 我请客，我在备忘这里写了烤面包机

　　After all that, you can't even tell what name he chose. 到最后，你还是看不出来他到底选了什么名字

　　His signature's illegible. 他的签名根本无法辨认

　　It's the signature of a doctor. 这就该是医生的签名

　　Doesn't matter what name he chose. 不管他选了什么名字都无所谓

　　Everyone will call him Dr. Huang. 反正每个人都会叫他黄医生的

　　And what name would you like to put your library card under? 你想在你的借书卡上登记什么名字

　　Jenny. Mm.  珍妮，嗯

　　Perfect. That's all I need. 很好，这样就足够了

　　Welcome to the D.C puplic library system, Jenny. 欢迎加入华盛顿公共图书馆系统，珍妮

　　I see you back in 5 days when the books are due. 五天后等你还书的时候再见

　　Okay. Have a great day. Bye, Jenny. 好的，祝你今天愉快，再见，珍妮