Before you leave, could you test these noise-cancelling headphones? 你俩走之前，能帮我测试一下这降噪耳机吗？

Yeah, sure. Okay. 好呀。

Go ahead. 开始吧。

Hello, can you hear me? 你好，能听见我说话吗？

Sheldon, I haven't changed the filter in the water pitcher in two years. 谢尔顿，咱家水壶里的滤水器已经两年没换过了。

Uh, Bernadette's nickname for you is the virgin pina colada. 伯纳黛特给你取了个外号叫处子鸡尾酒。（意为无酒精的鸡尾酒）。

Your George Lucas autograph is really a "me" autograph. 你收藏的乔治·卢卡斯签名其实是我的签名。

Yeah, well, once I was too lazy to walk across the hall, so I used your toothbrush. 有一次我懒得走回我家去，于是我借用了你的牙刷。

Ooh, and one time when you were asleep, Amy totally took off her...And that's why you're the best roommate ever. 还有一次你睡着了，艾米脱掉了她的所以你才是百里挑一的好室友。

Now I'm sad I didn't hear it. 真可惜我没听到这些好话。

So what do you need the headphones for? 你拿这降噪耳机干嘛用呢？

Well, I've been struggling for months to come up with a theory of dark matter that doesn't make protons decay. 我这几个月一直在研究暗物质中质子不衰变的问题。

I'm hoping to finally tackle it by optimizing my work environment. See, I've got, uh, my tea is at the perfect sipping temperature. 我希望能靠优化工作环境的办法来解决这个问题。所以我准备了最佳饮用温度的茶。

Uh, I have fleece-lined boxer shorts to keep my tushie toasty. 还穿上了加绒的四角内裤保暖我的小屁屁。

And then, oh, last but not least, this inspirational cat poster, improved with the reassuring face of physics renegade Richard Feynman. 最后但也是同样重要的一点，这张激励人心的猫咪海报，上面印着物理学界的叛徒理查德·费曼和蔼可亲的脸。

Is that why you had to take him to Office Depot last night? 这就是你昨晚带他去文具店的原因吗？

I don't want to talk about it. There, the place is all yours. 我不想聊这件事。好了，这地盘归你了。

Yeah, have fun. 好好玩吧。

Oh, I wil. Nothing more fun than a paradigm-shifting evening of science. 我会的。没有比改变世界的科学之夜更让人开心的了。