That doesn't sound right. My research has shown that it takes three to five years of shameless begging. 听起来不太对啊。我的研究结果显示，这需要3到5年的厚脸皮苦求。

Honey, neither of us comes off good in that story. 亲爱的，这事说出来咱俩都不光彩。

Yeah, I-I...I saw that article you're talking about. Uh, the participants ask each other a series of questions designed to promote intimacy. 我...我有看到你说的那篇文章。参与者互问对方一系列能增加亲密度的问题。

And then they finish it off by staring into each other's eyes for four minutes. 在最后结束前，还要凝视彼此双眼四分钟。

Oh, that's nonsense. I proclaimed my love for you. And the last time I looked into your eyes was when you thought you had conjunctivitis. 这真是胡说八道。我敢说我爱你。可上一次我看着你的双眼是因为你觉得自己得了结膜炎。

Other than the fact that I had it, that was a magical night. 虽然我的确是得了结膜炎，但那也真是个浪漫之夜啊。

Raj, would you ever try an experiment like that with Emily? 拉杰，你会跟艾米丽做这样的实验吗？

What? I don't need science to win her heart. I have my family's wealth for that. 我才不需要靠科学来赢得她芳心。有我家的钱就够了。

I'm telling you, you can't create love in a few hours. Right? 相信我，几个小时是无法造就爱的吧。对吧？

Oh, careful. You're poking at the whole foundation of The Bachelor. 话别说太满。你这是在质疑整个《非诚勿扰》节目核心。

Yeah, but we don't have to debate this. We're scientists. We can conduct our own research. 我们不需要在这上面辩论啊。我们是科学家，我们能自己做实验。

Yeah, I propose that we imprison two street people. And...- No. 我提议我们囚禁两个流浪汉，然后...-不行。

You didn't even let me finish. 你都还没让我说完呢。

Forget it! 别闹了！

So, you can experiment on all the apes you want. 所以你爱怎么实验猩猩就怎么实验。

But I want to manipulate the emotions of two captive human beings, suddenly I'm the monster. 但如果是我想操控两个被囚禁人类的情绪，我就瞬间成了大魔王是吗。

Why don't you just do the test? 为什么你不自己做这测试呢？

In the interest of science, I'd be willing to. 为了科学，我很乐意。

What? You're okay with an experiment where you have to answer awkward questions about your innermost feelings? 什么？你会愿意接受一场你得回答最深层内心想法的尴尬问题的实验吗？

Yes. 是啊。

Please, can I do it with him? Please? ! 拜托拜托，让我跟他做这实验行吗？

I've been listening to Sheldon's feelings on things for ten years. Tag, you're it. 我听了谢尔顿对人事物的感受足足十年了。换人，你上场吧。

Yeah, but what if the experiment works? 万一实验成功了怎么办？

I'm not gonna fall in love with Sheldon. 我不会爱上谢尔顿。

That's what I said. Before I knew it, he pontificated his way right into my heart. 我当年也这么说。结果他以迅雷不及掩耳之势霸道地侵占了我的心。

Uh, fun fact: "pontificate" comes from the Latin word "pontifex," which means "bridge builder" or "pope." 趣味知识："霸道"是来自拉丁文里的"教皇"，有着"造桥人"或"教皇"的意思。

In love yet? 爱上了吗？