Children and Social Media: Some Advice for Concerned Parents

Children and Social Media: Some Advice for Concerned Parents

With so many social media services aimed at children, parents and families need help.

Some are seeing their children's mental health suffer despite connections with friends on Instagram and TikTok. Others are questioning if children should be on social media at all.

Lawmakers have taken notice, too.

In April, the European Union approved a new law to force social media companies to remove harmful content or risk paying billions in fines.

In the United States, federal lawmakers recently introduced a bill aiming to ban all children under the age of 13 from using social media. It would also require those under 18 to get permission from a guardian¹ to create an account. And the Federal Trade Commission² is proposing changes to ban Facebook's parent company Meta from making money from data it collects on children.

But making laws and enforcing them takes time. For now, here is some advice, for parents and children, on staying safe, communicating, and setting limits on social media:

Is 13 the right age?

In the U.S., there is already a rule that bans children under 13 from using online social media that advertise to them without parental³ agreement. It is called the Children's Online Privacy⁴ Protection Act which went into effect in 2000.

To agree with the law, social media companies have generally banned children under 13 from signing up for their services. However, it has been widely documented that children sign up anyway, either with or without their parent's agreement.

Today, however, online privacy is not the only concern when it comes to children being online. Children now face risks of bullying⁶, eating disorders⁷, suicidal thoughts, or worse.

For years, there has been a push among parents, educators, and tech experts to wait to give children phones – and a way to get on social media – until they are older. One example is "Wait Until 8th" where parents agree to wait until their children are 13 or 14 to give them a smartphone. But neither social media companies nor the government have made any changes to increase the age limit.

If the law will not ban children, should parents?

"There is not necessarily a magical age," said Christine Elgersma, a social media expert at the nonprofit Common Sense Media. But, she added, "13 is probably not the best age for kids to get on social media."

The laws currently⁸ being proposed in the U.S. include bans on the under-13 set when it comes to social media. But there is no easy way to check a person's age when they sign up for online services.

Companies have added some changes over the years, Elgersma noted⁹. But she said, "Developers need to start building apps with kids in mind."

Some parents have chosen to ban their children from social media completely. But experts say this could lead to isolating¹⁰ some children. They could be left out of activities and discussions with friends that take place on social media.

Another consideration is that children who have never been on social media may find it difficult to use social media when they are suddenly permitted to when they turn 18.

Talk, talk, talk

Elgersma suggests that parents go through their own social media and open discussions with their children before they are old enough to be online. For older children, she suggests learning about their interests as a way to have conversations.

Jean Rogers is the director of the nonprofit Fairplay's Screen Time Action Network. She advises parents not to say things like "Turn that thing off!" when their child has been on social media for a long time. "That's not respectful," Rogers said. "It doesn't respect that they have a whole life and a whole world in that device."

Instead, Rogers suggests asking them questions about what they do on their phone, and seeing what your child is wanting to share.

Elgersma adds that movies that explore the dark sides of social media or research how social media companies make money can be good ways to connect with children on the subject.

"Kids love to be in the know about these things, and it will give them a sense of power," she said.

Setting limits

Rogers says most parents have success with taking their children's phones overnight to limit their online social media use. It is a plan that usually works because children need a break from the screen.

Rogers adds that it is helpful to explain what you are doing with your phone. Tell your child that you are looking at emails, looking up ideas for dinner, or paying a bill so they understand you are not on there just for fun. Then tell them when you plan to put the phone down.

Words in This Story

guardian – n. someone who takes care of another person or of another person's property

bully⁵ – v. to frighten, hurt, or threaten (a smaller or weaker person)

magic – adj. very pleasant or exciting

app – n. a computer program that performs a special function

kid – n. a young person

isolate¹¹ – v. to put or keep (someone or something) in a place or situation that is separate from others

1 guardian   

n.监护人；守卫者，保护者

参考例句：

• The form must be signed by the child's parents or guardian. 这张表格须由孩子的家长或监护人签字。
• The press is a guardian of the public weal. 报刊是公共福利的卫护者。

2 commission   

n.委托，授权，委员会，拥金，回扣，委任状

参考例句：

• The salesman can get commission on everything he sells.这个售货员能得到所售每件货物的佣金。
• The commission is made up of five people,including two women.委员会由五人组成，其中包括两名妇女。

3 parental   

adj.父母的；父的；母的

参考例句：

• He encourages parental involvement in the running of school.他鼓励学生家长参与学校的管理。
• Children always revolt against parental disciplines.孩子们总是反抗父母的管束。

4 privacy   

n.私人权利，个人自由，隐私权

参考例句：

• In such matters,privacy is impossible.在这类事情中，保密是不可能的。
• She wept in the privacy of her own room.她在自己房内暗暗落泪。

5 bully   

n.恃强欺弱者，小流氓；vt.威胁，欺侮

参考例句：

• A bully is always a coward.暴汉常是懦夫。
• The boy gave the bully a pelt on the back with a pebble.那男孩用石子掷击小流氓的背脊。

6 bullying   

v.恐吓，威逼( bully的现在分词 )；豪；跋扈

参考例句：

• Many cases of bullying go unreported . 很多恐吓案件都没有人告发。
• All cases of bullying will be severely dealt with. 所有以大欺小的情况都将受到严肃处理。 来自《简明英汉词典》

7 disorders   

n.混乱( disorder的名词复数 )；凌乱；骚乱；（身心、机能）失调

参考例句：

• Reports of anorexia and other eating disorders are on the increase. 据报告，厌食症和其他饮食方面的功能紊乱发生率正在不断增长。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• The announcement led to violent civil disorders. 这项宣布引起剧烈的骚乱。 来自《简明英汉词典》

8 currently   

adv.通常地，普遍地，当前

参考例句：

• Currently it is not possible to reconcile this conflicting evidence.当前还未有可能去解释这一矛盾的例证。
• Our contracts are currently under review.我们的合同正在复查。

9 noted   

adj.著名的，知名的

参考例句：

• The local hotel is noted for its good table.当地的那家酒店以餐食精美而著称。
• Jim is noted for arriving late for work.吉姆上班迟到出了名。

10 isolating   

adj.孤立的，绝缘的v.使隔离( isolate的现在分词 )；将…剔出（以便看清和单独处理）；使（某物质、细胞等）分离；使离析

参考例句：

• Colour filters are not very effective in isolating narrow spectral bands. 一些滤色片不能很有效地分离狭窄的光谱带。 来自辞典例句
• This became known as the streak method for isolating bacteria. 这个方法以后就称为分离细菌的划线法。 来自辞典例句

11 isolate   

vt.使孤立，隔离

参考例句：

• Do not isolate yourself from others.不要把自己孤立起来。
• We should never isolate ourselves from the masses.我们永远不能脱离群众。