经典双语笑话 第52期:先享受后付款

 Play Now Pay Later 先享受后付款

Jack¹ the playboy had explored every corner of the world and dallied² with many women, 花花公子杰克喜欢到世界各地探险，和许多妓女风流，

but in Hong Kong he finally encountered a professional girl who left him with far more than fond memories. 但在香港，他终于遇到一名职业神女，这名神女留给他的不止是温柔的回忆而已。

First, he consulted a British doctor. 首先他请教了一名英国医生。

"Good Lord!" exclaimed the medic, “我的天啊!”医生叫道，

"you've got more venereal diseases than a medical textbook.  “你所患的性病比一本医学教科书还要丰富，

I'm afraid we' re going to have to amputate. " 恐怕我们必须把你的东西切除掉。”

Horrified³, the playboy sought out an American specialist, who shook his head gravely and said, 花花公子心生恐惧，便找了一位美国专科医师帮忙，但那名专科医师表情凝重地摇头说：

"Sorry, son, if we don't amputate your member,  “对不起，小兄弟，如果我们不切除那活儿，

the disease will spread to your other organs. " 病毒将会感染到其他器官。”

Desperately⁴, the swinger consulted a Chinese herbalist. 那名风流公子走投无路，便向一位中医请教。

The wise old man examined the patient carefully and nodded his head sagely⁵. 这位充满智慧的老先生仔细检查病人后煞有介事地点头说道：

"I know your problem," he said.  “我知道你的问题。

"You play with bad girl, she very sick, now you very sick. " 你和坏女人乱搞，她的性病很严重，你现在的病情也很严重。…

“Doctor, the British and American doctors told me my pride and joy would have to be cut off..." “大夫，英国和美国的医生都说我的东西必须要切除……”

"These Western doctors, all they want to do is cut, cut, cut, and charge big money. " “这些西医所做的就是切，切，切，然后收一大笔钱。”

"You mean I don't need surgery? ! " exclaimed the young man joyously⁶. “你意思是我可以不用动外科手术?!”年轻人喜出望外地问道。

"Don't you worry, " said the ancient practitioner⁷. “别担心，”老中医师说：

"You go home, relax, wait two, three weeks, pecker fall off by himself." “回家去，好好休息一阵，等二三个星期后，那活儿会自己掉下来。”

1.spread to 传播；蔓延

例句：The cancer has spread to his stomach.

癌肿已扩散到他的胃部.

2.dallied with 勾搭；戏弄

例句：He is not a man to be dallied with.

他不是那种可以随便戏弄的人。

3.venereal disease 性病

例句：Venereal disease continues to be a significant public health problem.

性病仍为严重的公共健康问题。

4.seek out 陷入；插入

例句：A salesman's job is to seek out customers.

推销员的工作是发掘顾客。

1 jack   

n.插座，千斤顶，男人；v.抬起，提醒，扛举；n.（Jake）杰克

参考例句：

• I am looking for the headphone jack.我正在找寻头戴式耳机插孔。
• He lifted the car with a jack to change the flat tyre.他用千斤顶把车顶起来换下瘪轮胎。

2 dallied   

v.随随便便地对待( dally的过去式和过去分词 )；不很认真地考虑；浪费时间；调情

参考例句：

• He dallied with the idea of becoming an actor. 他对当演员一事考虑过，但并不认真。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• He dallied in the stores. 他在商店里闲逛。 来自《简明英汉词典》

3 horrified   

a.(表现出)恐惧的

参考例句：

• The whole country was horrified by the killings. 全国都对这些凶杀案感到大为震惊。
• We were horrified at the conditions prevailing in local prisons. 地方监狱的普遍状况让我们震惊。

4 desperately   

adv.极度渴望地，绝望地，孤注一掷地

参考例句：

• He was desperately seeking a way to see her again.他正拼命想办法再见她一面。
• He longed desperately to be back at home.他非常渴望回家。

5 sagely   

adv. 贤能地，贤明地

参考例句：

• Even the ones who understand may nod sagely. 即使对方知道这一点，也会一本正经地点头同意。
• Well, that's about all of the sagely advice this old grey head can come up with. 好了，以上就是我这个满头银发的老头儿给你们的充满睿智的忠告。

6 joyously   

ad.快乐地, 高兴地

参考例句：

• She opened the door for me and threw herself in my arms, screaming joyously and demanding that we decorate the tree immediately. 她打开门，直扑我的怀抱，欣喜地喊叫着要马上装饰圣诞树。
• They came running, crying out joyously in trilling girlish voices. 她们边跑边喊，那少女的颤音好不欢快。 来自名作英译部分

7 practitioner   

n.实践者，从事者；(医生或律师等)开业者

参考例句：

• He is an unqualified practitioner of law.他是个无资格的律师。
• She was a medical practitioner before she entered politics.从政前她是个开业医生。