向前一步:第190期 全能女人是个神话(23)

 Children absolutely need parental¹ involvement, love, care, time, and attention. 孩子的成长需要父母的参与、关爱、照料、陪伴以及注意力的倾注，

But parents who work outside the home are still capable of giving their children a loving and secure childhood. 但上班族父母也完全能够给予孩子一个充满爱与安全感的童年。

Some data even suggest that having two parents working outside the home can be advantageous² to a child's development, particularly for girls. 有些数据甚至表明，父母都是上班族，对孩子尤其是女孩的成长是有益的。

Although I know the data and understand intellectually that my career is not harming my children, there are times when I still feel anxious about my choices. 尽管我掌握着这些数据，也很清楚我的事业没有危及孩子，但有时候我还是会对自己的选择感到焦虑。

A friend of mine felt the same way, so she discussed it with her therapist and, later, shared this insight: 我的一个朋友也有同样的感觉，所以她和心理医生进行了讨论，并与我分享了以下心得：

"My therapist told me that when I was worrying about how much I was leaving my girls, “心理医生告诉我，当我开始因为不在孩子身边而感到焦虑时，

that separation anxiety is actually more about the mom than the kids. 这种分离焦虑感事实上更多地源自母亲而非孩子。

We talk about it as though it is a problem for children, but actually it can be more of an issue for the mom." 我们谈论这件事貌似是孩子的问题，但实际上这主要与母亲有关。”

I always want to do more for my children. 我总是想抽出更多时间与孩子们相处。

Because of work obligations, I've missed doctor's appointments and parent-teacher conferences and have had to travel when my kids were sick. 由于工作原因，比如没能如约带他们去看医生，没能参加他们的家长会，甚至在他们生病的时候也会出差。

I have also missed a level of detail about their lives. 我曾错过了很多生活中的点点滴滴。

I once asked a mother at our school if she knew any of the other kids in the first-grade class, hoping for a familiar name or two. 我曾问一位孩子同学的母亲，是否认识一年级的其他孩子，心想她应该能说出一两个名字吧。

 

1 parental   

adj.父母的；父的；母的

参考例句：

• He encourages parental involvement in the running of school.他鼓励学生家长参与学校的管理。
• Children always revolt against parental disciplines.孩子们总是反抗父母的管束。

2 advantageous   

adj.有利的；有帮助的

参考例句：

• Injections of vitamin C are obviously advantageous.注射维生素C显然是有利的。
• You're in a very advantageous position.你处于非常有利的地位。