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(单词翻译:双击或拖选)
The You of Yesterday
昨天的你
Paula Peisnes Coxe(葆拉·皮兹尼斯·考克斯)
Learning from our mistakes. Picking yourself up from defeat. Loving and being loved. Tears
and smiles. Our experiences of joy and pain in our past contribute to who we are today. From the
time of infancy1, our subconscious2 mind has recorded the affections, emotions, pains, and joys of
childhood. Perhaps as a little child you were told that you weren't good enough, or that you should
be more like your brother or sister or even the neighbor's child. No doubt these comments,
whether intentional3 or not, hurt — particularly if coming from your parents. An indelible scar is
left.
Attempting in vain to please. Looking for control. Fearing abandonment. Seeking approval.
All of these ways of dealing4 with people, with the world around us, creates a battle in our hearts
and in our minds. Three of the most common ways we perpetuate5 a vicious cycle of inner
chaos6 are: looking to others for validation7 , expecting that others will act as we desire, and
trying to be something we're not.
The inner chaos results in a constant repetition of “If only...”; “If only I had more
money...”; “If only I were prettier, thinner, happier.” On and on it goes. There is never enough.
The roots of this dissatisfaction can be found in your past. While we cannot rewrite the past,
we can change how we deal with our inner demons8, fears, and insecurities related to past
experiences.
The choice is yours. The rewards can be innumerable if, on your path to finding peace of
mind, you truthfully look into your past with forgiveness and confidence, knowing that you can
wrap up your worries and “if only”s in a little private gift box addressed to you alone. You can
then place this imaginary gift box on a shelf in the far corner of your mind, barely visible, in no
way interfering9 with who you are today and what you will become tomorrow.
It's time to put your past behind you.
从错误中学习。从失败中鼓起勇气。爱他人,也为他人所爱。有悲伤的泪水,也有灿
烂的笑容。我们过去的悲喜经历铸就了我们的今天。自孩提时期,我们的潜意识里就记录
了儿时的喜爱、情感、痛苦和欢乐。也许,从小时候起,有人就说你不怎么好,你该更像
你的兄弟或姐妹,甚至邻居家的孩子。毫无疑问,这些说法不管是否出于有意,都伤害了
你,特别是出于亲生父母之口,更会留下永久的伤痕。
于是我们徒劳地想要取悦于人,寻求管制,害怕被抛弃,寻求赞许。所有这些跟人
们、跟我们身边的世界打交道的方法,都会引起内心和头脑里的混战。有三种最常见的做
法,使我们无法摆脱内心混乱的恶性循环:指望别人的肯定,期待别人会按我们的意愿行
事,试图成为我们本不适合成为的那种人。
内心世界的混乱导致我们不断重复“要是”“要是我有更多的钱就好了”“要是我更漂亮
点、更苗条点、更幸福点就好了”,如此等等,不一而足。
这种不满足的根源能够在你的过去找到。我们无法改写过去,但我们可以改变如何对
付我们内心的恶魔、恐惧以及与过去经历相关的心神不宁。
选择在于你自己。在寻找内心平静的路上,怀着宽恕与信心坦诚地回顾以往,弄明白
你可以把种种忧虑和“要是”装进一只专为你准备的私人礼品盒中,这样,回报会无比丰
厚。而后,你可以把这个想象的礼品盒放在你内心深处角落里的一个架子上,几乎看不
见,让它一点也不打扰今天的你和明天的你。
该是把昨天抛之脑后的时候了。
1 infancy | |
n.婴儿期;幼年期;初期 | |
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2 subconscious | |
n./adj.潜意识(的),下意识(的) | |
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3 intentional | |
adj.故意的,有意(识)的 | |
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4 dealing | |
n.经商方法,待人态度 | |
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5 perpetuate | |
v.使永存,使永记不忘 | |
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6 chaos | |
n.混乱,无秩序 | |
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7 validation | |
n.确认 | |
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8 demons | |
n.恶人( demon的名词复数 );恶魔;精力过人的人;邪念 | |
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9 interfering | |
adj. 妨碍的 动词interfere的现在分词 | |
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