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六人行FriendsMP3 10-11

时间:2006-08-20 16:00来源:互联网 提供网友:wrcwin   字体: [ ]
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1011 The One Where The Stripper Cries

 

[Scene: Central Perk1. Everyone's sitting on the couch. Monica and Joey enter.]

Joey: Hey guys!

Monica: Hey, let me tell them!

Joey: Sure.

Monica: Joey is gonna be a celebrity2 guest on a game show!

Phoebe: Great!

Ross: Really? Which one?

Monica: (stopping Joey from answering) Ohh! Fish, seaweed, a sunken ship.

Ross: Things you find in the ocean, (to Joey) You're gonna be on "Pyramid"!!

Monica: Oh, that was our favorite game show ever!

Ross: Except for "Match game"...

Monica: Or "Win, Lose or Draw".

Chandler: What did I marry into?

Joey: Would you guys want to come down tomorrow and watch me tape the show?

Monica: Oh, I can't. We're throwing Phoebe a bachelorette party.

Phoebe: Yeah, sorry boys, this ride's closing.

Ross: Oh, and Chandler and I have this stupid college alumni thing. I can't believe you get to meet Donny Osmond.

Joey: Seriously?

Ross: (very excited) Yeah-uh!

Monica: Ross and I always wanted to be Donny and Marie.

Chandler: You guys just keep getting cooler and cooler!

Monica: Yeah, we used to perform for our family and friends.

Rachel: Oh God, that's right. I blocked that out.

Monica: (singing an old Donny and Marie song) "I'm a little bit country"...

Ross: (continues singing) "...and I'm a little bit rock 'n' roll"!

Chandler: (to Monica) I'm leaving you.

OPENING CREDITS

[Scene: Class of '91 reunion. Ross and Chandler enter.]

Ross: So weird4 to see all these people again... Oh my God, look, there's Geoffrey Cleric.

Chandler: Who?

Ross: He was roommates with John Rosoff. He went out with Andrea Tamburino. She dumped him for Michael Skloff.

Chandler: (looking around) Did I go to this school?

Ross: Hey, there's Missy Goldberg. You gotta remember her.

Chandler: (looks over at her) Sure, nice.

Ross: Dude. You're married to my sister.

Chandler: You're right, by saying "nice" I'm virtually licking her.

Ross: Hey, I hear she's single again, d'you think I should ask her out?

Chandler: Are you asking permission to break the pact5?

Ross: Yes please.

[Flashback, year 1987. Chandler enters the school's corridor. Ross is hanging some flyers on the wall. Both have a funny 80s hair and clothes.]

Ross: Hey. Hey, check out the flyers for the band. I made 'em on a Macintosh in the computer room!

Chandler: Awesome6, the name really stands out.

Ross: Thanks to a little something called "Helvetica Bold 24 point"!

Chandler: Man, we're gonna rock that Asian student union!

Missy: Hey guys!

Chandler: Hey!

Ross: Hey, Missy...

Chandler: You know, our band is playing on Friday.

Ross: Yeah, yeah. You should come check us out. We're called "Way! No Way!".

Missy: No way!

Chandler and Ross: Way!

Missy: Right. I'll be there. (she leaves)

Chandler: Fresh!

Ross: Boss!

Chandler: Mint!

Ross: She's gone.

Chandler: I know it. You know, I'm totally gonna ask her out.

Ross: Dude, I was gonna ask her out.

Chandler: I said it first, bro.

Ross: Well, I thought it first, Holmes.

Chandler: (angrily) Look, if you did...

Ross: Woha! Wait... What are we doing? What we have is too important to mess it up over some girl. I mean, we can get laid anytime we want.

Chandler: Totally. I had sex in High school...

Ross: Me too. I'm good at it.

Chandler: All right, I'd say we make a pact. Neither of us will go out with Missy Goldberg.

Ross: You got it.

Chandler: All right, so that's Missy Goldberg, Phoebe Cates and Molly Ringwald, who neither of us can go out with.

Ross: Those are the pacts7!

Chandler: Oh, and Sheena Easton. But we probably couldn't get her anyway.

Ross: Oh, oh... maybe not you!

[We get back to the Class of '91 reunion, where Ross and Chandler are still looking at Missy.]

Chandler: Well, I officially give you permission to break the pact.

Ross: Thank you. (they shake hands) All right, here I go. Hey, remember how scary it used to be going up to girls in college?

Chandler: Your hands are shaking.

Ross: I know, and I can't stop sweating. (he walks towards Missy)

[Scene: The "Pyramid" Studio.]

Voice: Five! Four! Three! Applause!

Donny Osmond: Yeah! Welcome, it is Soap Opera week here on Pyramid, let's meet our contestants8. First, Gene9 Lester is a database specialist, he's gonna be playing with "Days of Our Life's" star Joey Tribbiani! (Joey's amazed at the place and he keeps looking around till he realizes the audience is applauding him)

Joey: (to Gene) I know it could be intimidating10 for regular people to be around celebrities11 but... relax, I'm just like you! (pause) Only better looking and richer.

Donny: ...should be playing with the star of "General Hospital" Leslie Charleson. (applause) Welcome everybody. Good luck to all of you. Let's play Pyramid. All right? Now... we flipped12 a coin before the show, Gene, you won the toss, so you're gonna start. Which category would you like?

Gene: I'll take "You crossed the line".

Donny: You crossed the line. Joey, describe for Gene these things that have lines. Give me 20 seconds on the clock, please. Ready, go!

Joey: (on the screen there's the word "Supermarket") Uhm... ok. It's a store, like a supermarket. (there is a sound indicating he made a mistake as he shouldn't have said 'supermarket'. The next word appears, "notebook") Oh! I see-I see what I did. Yeah, ok, ok, uhm... I'm writing in my...

Gene: Diary.

Joey: Noo, (whispering) more like a notebook... Damn it! (next word appears: "blueprint") Oh, if I'm building an house, the plan isn't called the 'shmoo-print'... Can't say that either? Woha... hey... (the last word is "Football field" and there are 5 seconds left) In high school, I once had sex with a girl right in the middle of the...

Gene: Cafeteria.

Joey: Yeah! But that is not what they're looking for. (time's finished) OOOH!

[Scene: Monica's apartment, where Phoebe's bachelorette party is taking place.]

Phoebe: (to Rachel) Thank you so much for this.

Rachel: Oh, d'you like it?

Phoebe: Oh my God, it's all so elegant! When's the dirty stuff starting?

Rachel: What?

Phoebe: You know, the strippers, and the guys dancing, and you know, pee-pee's flying about.

Rachel: Pheebs, I... there isn't gonna be any flying about! We actually thought we were a little too mature for stuff like that.

Phoebe: Oh, ok. I see what you're doing, that's fine. This is all there is, just tea, uh, ok. (she drinks her tea) Hmmmm... raunchy!

Rachel: Seriously Pheebs, it's not gonna be that kind of a party.

Phoebe: Really? So this is... this is my big send off in the married life? Rachel this is the only bachelorette party I'm ever gonna have! I've got a big wad of $1s in my purse! Really? I mean, really? It's just tea?

Rachel: Nooo! Phoebe, of course there is more! I mean, I'll just go and talk to Monica and get an ETA on the pee-pee's!

[Scene: Joey's at the game show "Pyramid" with host Donny Osmond.]

Donny: Now Gene I must remind you, you need all six of these to stay in the game, all right? Describe for Joey things you find in your refrigerator.

Joey: Ahaha, he might as well just give us the points.

Donny: Give me twenty seconds on the clock. Ready? Go!

(the first word is cream)

Gene: You put this in your coffee.

Joey: A spoon. Your hands. Your face!

Gene: It's white!

Joey: Paper, snow, a ghost!

Gene: It's heavier then milk!

Joey: A rock, a dog, the earth.

Gene: Pass!

(the second word is mayonnaise)

Gene: You put this on a sandwich.

Joey: Salami, anchovies13, jam!

Gene: It's white!

Joey: Paper, snow, a ghost!

Gene: It's made from eggs!

Joey: Chickens?

Gene: Pass!

Joey: Oh!

(The third word is ketchup14)

Gene: You put this on a hamburger!

Joey: Ketchup!

Gene: Yes!

(The fourth word is soda)

Joey: Relish15!

Gene: Stop!

Joey: Oh.

Donny: Oh, time's up! Joey! You were, uh, almost on a roll there...

Joey: Yeah...

Donny: Uh, Gene, you're gonna have a chance to go to the winner circle in the second half. But right now Henrietta you are going to the winner circle to try your luck for ten thousand dollars, right after this, don't go away.

Stage Manager : And we're out!

Joey: Oh, so we didn't win, but it's fun to play the game, right?

Gene: Hey! I got a kid starting college. I've to get surgery on my knee, you just lost me ten grand!

Joey: Oh, wow! I'm so sorry, ok? I promise, we'll do better next time!

Gene: Well, I will, because I won't be playing with you.

Joey: Hey, you know, some of those are pretty hard! Like why would there be a ghost in my fridge? (pause) . Yeah!

[Scene: College reunion party. Ross is talking to Missy.]

Ross: So, Saturday night!

Missy: I'd love to!

Ross: Great!

Missy: So how come it took you so long to ask me out?

Ross: Oh, well, uh, this is gonna sound kinda silly, but, do you remember my roommate Chandler Bing?

Missy: Sure, he was in your "band"? (she air quotes band)

Ross: It's been sixteen years but the air quotes still hurt.

Missy: Sorry.

Ross: That's ok. Uh, anyway, well he and I both really liked you a lot, uhm, but we didn't want anything to jeopardize16 our friendship, so we kinda made a pact, that neither of us could ask you out!

Missy: Really?

Ross: Yeah, why?

Missy: Well, Chandler and I used to make out! A lot!

Ross: You did?

Missy: Yeah. We'd go to the science lab after hours!

Ross: (angrily) AND ON MY TURF?

[Scene: Monica's apartment. The bachelorette party.]

Monica: (to Rachel) Hey, where is this guy, it's been over an hour!

Rachel: Well, he's coming from Jersey17, he said he would get here as fast as he could!

(someone knocks at the door)

Monica: Who is it?

Man: It's the police!

Rachel: (pretends to be shocked) Uh! The police!

Phoebe: (Excited, running back to her seat) Oh!

Man: That's right, it's officer Goodbody.

Monica: What's the matter, officer? Has someone been bad? (looks over to Phoebe and she opens the door, and to their dismay, the stripper is an old, short, fat guy who looks exhausted)

Roy, the male stripper: (coughs) Whoo, that's a lot of stairs!

COMMERCIAL BREAK

Roy: Ooh, boy. You should warn people there's no elevator! I should not have had that Mexican food for lunch.

Monica: Are you gonna be ok, officer, uhm,...

Roy: Goodbody!

Monica: ...If-you-say-so.

Roy: So where's the young lady who I'm supposed to take (he shakes his hips18) downtown! (Monica points Phoebe)

Phoebe: Oh, God!

Roy: All right, somebody show me where to plug in my box, and we'll get this party started! (he thrusts his pelvis towards Phoebe) Whaaaa... (walks back to plug in his cd player) Here? All right.

Phoebe: Rachel?

Rachel: Yeah?

Phoebe: Are you kidding?

Rachel: All right, look, we did not know that you wanted a stripper so we went to the phonebook and we got the first name we could find!

Phoebe: How old is your phonebook?

Monica: Oh my God, this man is gonna get naked in my apartment!

Phoebe: Oh God no, I don't wanna see him take his clothes off!

Roy: Are you talking about me?

Monica: Oh, no! I mean, obviously we want to see you take your clothes off! You big piece of eye candy!

Roy: Ok, ok, ladies! Can I have your attention, please? (pause) Did someone call for the long arm of the law? (He extends his arm from around his crotch and then upward and outward, towards Phoebe) I should warn you, I have a concealed19 weapon! (Puts his hands over his crotch)

I hope you're familiar with the States penal20 code, ok, ok, enough teasing. Now for some pleasing!

(he uses his remote to turn on the music, "Tainted21 Love" by Soft Cell, and starts dancing for Phoebe. He shakes his butt22, moves his shoulders back, grabs his crotch and hops23 towards Phoebe. Phoebe is half horrified24 and half scared. He takes his hat off and throws it away, does some "Can Can" high kicks and swings his butt in front of Phoebe who looks at it in disgust. Then he tears open his shirt and shows her his chest and she flinches25.)

Roy: Whoa, whoa, whoa (he turn off the music) . She cringed!

Phoebe: This is how I look when I'm turned on!

Roy: You were talking about me before! Look, I don't need this! I'm outta here! Where's my hat? (goes to get it) Look, I've been in this business for a long time!

Phoebe: Shocking!

Roy: Now if you just pay me my three hundred dollars, I'll be on my way!

Phoebe: Three hundred dollars, are you kidding?

Rachel: No, that's ok, let's me just get my check book!

Phoebe: No, you're not gonna pay him, he didn't do anything!

Roy: Didn't do anything? I took a bus all the way from Hoboken. I climbed ... I dunno... like a billion stairs... It's not like I can take them two at a time!

Phoebe: I don't care. We're not paying you 300 dollars for this.

Roy: Well, look - it's not my fault if you're too uptight26 to appreciate the male form in all it's glory.

Phoebe: Oh yeah, okay. I'm uptight. Yeah, that's why I don't want to watch a middle aged27 guy dance around in what I can only assume is a child halloween costume! (turns to look at Monica and Rachel who look like they feel very sorry for the stripper)

Roy: I may have borrowed this from my nephew, but let me assure you, what's underneath28 (points at his groin) ... is all man.

Phoebe: I'm sorry, did you say all man or old man?

Roy: (making a crying face) Oh, you're mean!

Monica: (walks towards Phoebe and the stripper) Uh, look, officer... uhm Sir...

Roy: Damnit. OH! (To Phoebe) Big surprise! The hunk of beef has feelings!

[Scene: At Pyramid. Joey is with the woman now.]

Donny: Ok Henrietta, you've picked Jack29 and Jill went up the hill.

Joey: (To Henrietta) My friend Rachel has a kid. I totally know nursery rhymes! (makes a thumbs up sign)

Donny: Joey describe these things associated with the United States congress. (Joey goes form looking very confident to looking very shocked the instant the word congress is said) Give me 20 seconds on the clock please. Ready? Go!

(Camera goes to Joey. The clock is at 20 sec. The word "Legislature" appears. He looks at it blank faced and his eyes shift between Henrietta and his screen)

Joey: Oh, .. uh... uh... pass. (Next word: "Rotunda") Pass. (Next word: "Filibuster30" stares at it a moment) Pass. (Henrietta is looking very confused) (Next word: "Addendum31" 4 seconds remaining) Okay, the little thing that hangs down at the back of your throat.

Henrietta: Uvula!

Joey: Oh, then pass. (Next word: "Joint32 session", but time's up, Joey acts very disappointed)

Donny: O-kay... Henrietta, you didn't get all the points you needed, so that means Gene, you are going to the winners circle to try for ten thousand dollars! (Gene is clapping his hands looking very happy and so is Joey) And you're gonna be going there with Joey Tribbiani (Both of their smiles fade away instantly)

[Scene: Class of '91 reunion. Ross is walking angrily towards Chandler, who is talking to two other guys.]

Ross: (To Chandler) You made out with Missy Goldberg. How could you do that, after you promised me?

(Chandler looks at the other two guys, embarrassed)

Chandler: (to the two guys) Excuse me. (Chandler and Ross move away from them) . That didn't make us sound gay at all!

Ross: You broke the pact!

Chandler: Ross, that was 16 years ago!

Ross: That doesn't matter! We're talking about the foundation of our friendship.

Chandler: I believe the foundation of our friendship was unfortunate hair. (Ross just stares at him) All right, look, if we're really gonna do this... it's not like you never broke one of the pacts.

Ross: I didn't.

Chandler: Oh really?

Ross: No.

Chandler: Oh really!?

Ross: NO!

Chandler: ADRIENNE TURNER!! (A girl behind them turns around)

Adrienne: Yes?

Chandler and Ross: Hey! Hey Adrienne. (They move away from her)

Ross: I never did anything with Adrienne Turner.

Chandler: Oh please, and you knew how much I liked her.

Ross: I don't know what... you're talking about.

Chandler: Really?

[Flashback scene: 80's College party.]

Present Chandler's voice: Remember that big party? Freshman33 year? A week before Christmas vacation? I do. You had some visitors.

(An 80's Rachel and fat Monica walk into the party room. Both with funny hairdos and clothes)

Monica: I can't believe we are at a real college party! (Rachel laughs excitedly) I have to pee so bad!

Rachel: This is so awesome! College guys are so cute!

Monica: Hey, you've got a boyfriend!

Rachel: I know. But if some guy who looks like Corey Haim wants to kiss me tonight, I'm sooo gonna let them! (They spot Chandler)

Monica: Look, there's Chandler, you know, that stupid friend of Ross' who said I'm fat. You know I've already lost 4 pounds!

Rachel: It... You can so totally tell.

Monica: I KNOW!

Rachel: Well let's see. Maybe he knows where Ross is. (They walk towards Chandler) Hey, how's it going (tries to look as un-interested in him as possible - checking out her nails) .

Chandler: Aren't you...?

Rachel: Yeah, Rachel. And this (points to Monica) is Ross' sister, Monica. We met at Thanksgiving. (looks around the room as if searching for something more interesting to do) .

Chandler: (smiling at Monica) Right. (to Rachel) So how're you doing?

Rachel: Bitchin'

Chandler: Hi Monica.

Monica: Hi Chandler. It's really nice to see you (rolls her eyes) NOT. (she and Rachel giggle34 a little and Chandler looks unimpressed)

Chandler: O-kay. I'll see if I can find Ross. (Goes off to find Ross.)

Monica: Oh my God Rach. Bean bag chairs.

Rachel: Oh.

Monica: Do NOT let me sit in one of those. We'll be here for days.

(Cut to Chandler. He's walking around looking for Ross. He sees him kissing a girl next to a vending35 machine)

Ross: Listen Adrienne, you can't tell Chandler about this.

Adrienne: Oh believe me, Ross, I won't be telling anybody about this.

Ross: Cool! (They start kissing again and Chandler looks shocked)

[Scene: We cut back to the present. The reunion where Chandler and Ross are talking.]

Ross: I didn't know you knew about that.

Chandler: Well, I did and it hurt. (they walk towards the bar) That's when I wrote the song: "Betrayal In The Common Room".

Ross: (looks disappointed in himself) Man... I... I'm sorry.

Chandler: Look (hands him a drink) it was a lo-o-ong time ago.

Ross: So, eh. I made out with Adrienne and you made out with Missy. Well I guess we're even.

Chandler: (smiling a little nervously) Hmm mmmhm..

Ross: We are even, right?

Chandler: (sighs) Just one more thing. I was so pissed at you that night that I wanted to get back at you. So I thought, who does Ross like the more than anybody?

Ross: (thinks about it for a few seconds) What did you do to my mom?

Chandler: Not her!

[Flashback scene: We cut back to the 80's party. Rachel and Monica are "dancing".]

Rachel: I am sooo drunk.

Monica: That's weird. I've had the same number of beers as you and I don't feel anything at all. (Chandler approaches)

Chandler: Soo... you girls having fun?

Monica: For your information, ass3 munch36, I've lost four pounds. Maybe even five with all the dancing. (A guy enters holding a pizza box)

Pizza guy: SOMEBODY ORDER A PIZZA?

Monica: Oh THATS ME! (she runs to the pizza guy)

Rachel: (finishing the last of her drink) I am soo not going to do good on my SATs tomorrow.

Chandler: Well maybe if you go to school here next year we can totally hang out.

Rachel: (sarcastic) Oh yeah. There is a plan! Why don't I just start taking my smart pills now?

Chandler: Well, maybe you can get in on a beauty scholarship.

Rachel: (blushing) Oh, what a line. (walks towards the drinks table with her back towards Chandler and whispers "Oh my God!")

Chandler: So where are you applying to?

Rachel: Oh well, You know, I think it's kinda really important that I go somewhere where there's sun, so I'm sort of... (Chandler leans in an kisses her) (She pulls away) Hey!

Chandler: I'm in college and I'm in a band.

Rachel: (She considers it for a second) Yeah okay. (She puts her hands around his neck and they start kissing again)

 

[Scene: Monica's apartment. The stripper is sitting at the kitchen table. Monica, Rachel and Phoebe are standing37 around him]

Roy: What's the matter? You never saw a 50 year old stripper cry before?

Phoebe: You know, it's fine. We'll pay you.

Roy: No, no, you're right. Who am I kidding? I should have hung up that breakaway jockstrap years ago. What am I gonna do? I mean, this has been my life for thirty two years. Taking my clothes off in front of people is all I know.

Rachel: No, wait. No there's gotta be something else that you can do. I mean, what skills do you have?

Roy: I don't know... I can make my pecs dance... I can pick up a dollar bill with my butt cheeks... I can go to that special place inside me where I feel no shame.

Rachel: So maybe something in an office.

Phoebe: Or you could teach stripping. You know, share your gift, pass the torch.

Roy: You know, actually that's not a bad idea. I can do it out of my apartment. I don't think my mom would mind.

Phoebe: There you go. Okay, do you think you're gonna be okay?

Roy: Yeah, yeah, yeah... This is so weird. I mean, you never know when it's gonna be your last dance. And I didn't even get a chance to finish it.

Phoebe: (after a pause) Finish it!

Roy: What?

Phoebe: Your last dance. Do it for us.

Roy: Really?

Rachel: (to Phoebe) Really?

Phoebe: Yeah, yeah. He deserves to do the thing he loves one last time.

Roy: Okay, all right... Get ready ladies!

(they sit down and Roy plays "You Make Me Feel" by Sylvester on his boom box, and starts... With his back towards the girls, he starts waving his hands, then backs towards the girls slapping his butt, then swings it around, and makes thrusting pelvic movements in front of Phoebe. He dances around the tables in between all the girls, and gets back into the kitchen part of the room. He then tears off one of his sleeves and throws it towards Monica and Rachel, who fight over who gets it. He then tears off his other sleeve and moves it back and forth38 between his legs, getting closer to Phoebe.)

Phoebe: Oh this is so ho-o-ot!

(Roy then sits on Phoebe's lap, looking exhausted)

Phoebe: Oh no, no, no, don't stop!

Roy: (out of breath) Have to...

 

[Scene: The game show studio. Joey and Gene are sitting in the winner circle.]

Donny: Well, welcome to the Winner Circle. Joey and Gene, you guys ready?

Joey: (nervously) Yeah...

Gene: (irritable) Sure. (Joey gets even more nervous)

Donny: Okay. Give me sixty seconds on the clock please... Ready, GO! (runs off)

(the screen says "6 to win" and "types of trees")

Gene: Oak, maple39, elm, birch...

Joey: I-I-I don't know. Types of trees?

(Joey hears the bell which means his answer is correct and is surprised. The screen now says "5 to win" and "Spanish words")

Gene: Uhm... Buenos días, enchilada, por favor...

Joey: (sympathetic) Oh, I'm so sorry. I don't know any Spanish words.

(There's the next bell, and the correct answer. The screen changes to "4 to win" and "things that burn". Gene now realizes that he got two correct answers and gets up in his seat.)

Gene: A match, a candle...

Joey: Things that go "tssst" when you put them out.

Gene: A torch, a bonfire... (Joey seems lost) uhm, your pee...

Joey: Things that burn.

(and another bell for the correct answer. "3 to win" and "What a dog might say")

Gene: "I'd like to go for a walk", uhm "scratch my belly40".

Joey: Dude, dude! I think you're losing it.

Gene: Uhm, "I have fur", "I like to bark".

Joey: Oh, oh, oh... What a dog says.

(the bell sounds again, "2 to win" and "pizza toppings")

Gene: Pepperoni...

Joey: (instantly) Pizza toppings, next!

(there's 10 seconds left, "1 to win" and "Supermodels")

Gene: Cindy Crawford, Christie Brinkley, Heidi Klum, Claudia Schiffer...

Joey: Oh, oh, oh... (5 seconds left)

Gene: Christie Turlington, Kate Moss41...

Joey: Girls Chandler could never get?

Gene: (irritated) Supermodels!

Joey: Where? (looking around)

[Scene: Chandler and Monica's apartment. Monica's there and Ross and Chandler walk in.]

Ross: Hey, where's Rachel?

Monica: She and Phoebe took the stripper to the hospital.

Ross: Did you know Chandler kissed Rachel?

Monica: What? When was this?

Ross: Nineteen Eighty Seven. The weekend you guys visited me at school.

Monica: Oh my God! That's wild!

Chandler: Yeah, but it was like a million years ago, so it doesn't matter.

Ross: Well, it matters to me.

Chandler: Why?

Ross: Because... the night you kissed Rachel was the night I kissed Rachel for the very first time.

Chandler: You kissed her that night too?

Monica: Two guys in one night? Wow, I thought she became a slut after she got her nose fixed42.

Chandler: Seriously, where did this happen?

Ross: Okay, after you told me she was passed out in our room, I went in there to make sure she was all right. She was lying on my bed, all buried in peoples' coats. Well, I went to kiss her on the forehead, you know. But it was so dark, I accidentally got her lips. I started to pull away, but then I felt her start to kiss me back. It was only for a second, but... it was amazing. And now, now I find out that you kissed her first.

Chandler: Oh wait... What bed did you say she was on?

Ross: Mine.

Chandler: I'm pretty sure I put her on my bed.

Ross: No, she was definitely on my bed.

Chandler: Why would I kiss a girl, and then put her on your bed?

Ross: Well, then who was on my bed?

Monica: (screeching) OH! Oh, oh! (holding her hand in front of her mouth)

Ross: (realizing) NO! No, no!

Monica: YES! (Chandler gets an "oh no!" look on his face)

Ross: You were under the pile of coats?

Monica: I was the pile of coats!

Ross: OH MY GOD!

Monica: You were my Midnight Mystery Kisser?

Ross: You were my first kiss with Rachel?

Monica: You were my first kiss ever?

Chandler: What did I marry into?

COMMERCIAL BREAK

[Scene: Back at the party in 1987. People are dancing to "Disco Inferno43" by The Trammps.]

(Monica is dancing. At first she seems insecure and moves slowly, but then gets into the groove44 and swings her hips from side to side while holding her hands up. She then eats the last piece of pizza she was holding and again moves her hips from side to side, pushing her hands in the air in beat with the music. Her moves get more wildly while she's snapping her fingers. She loses balance and falls back onto a pink bean bag.)

Monica: Oh, crap!

THE END


 


点击收听单词发音收听单词发音  

1 perk zuSyi     
n.额外津贴;赏钱;小费;
参考例句:
  • His perks include a car provided by the firm.他的额外津贴包括公司提供的一辆汽车。
  • And the money is,of course,a perk.当然钱是额外津贴。
2 celebrity xcRyQ     
n.名人,名流;著名,名声,名望
参考例句:
  • Tom found himself something of a celebrity. 汤姆意识到自己已小有名气了。
  • He haunted famous men, hoping to get celebrity for himself. 他常和名人在一起, 希望借此使自己获得名气。
3 ass qvyzK     
n.驴;傻瓜,蠢笨的人
参考例句:
  • He is not an ass as they make him.他不象大家猜想的那样笨。
  • An ass endures his burden but not more than his burden.驴能负重但不能超过它能力所负担的。
4 weird bghw8     
adj.古怪的,离奇的;怪诞的,神秘而可怕的
参考例句:
  • From his weird behaviour,he seems a bit of an oddity.从他不寻常的行为看来,他好像有点怪。
  • His weird clothes really gas me.他的怪衣裳简直笑死人。
5 pact ZKUxa     
n.合同,条约,公约,协定
参考例句:
  • The two opposition parties made an electoral pact.那两个反对党订了一个有关选举的协定。
  • The trade pact between those two countries came to an end.那两国的通商协定宣告结束。
6 awesome CyCzdV     
adj.令人惊叹的,难得吓人的,很好的
参考例句:
  • The church in Ireland has always exercised an awesome power.爱尔兰的教堂一直掌握着令人敬畏的权力。
  • That new white convertible is totally awesome.那辆新的白色折篷汽车简直棒极了.
7 pacts 2add620028f09a3af9f25b75b004f8ed     
条约( pact的名词复数 ); 协定; 公约
参考例句:
  • Vassals can no longer accept one-sided defensive pacts (!). 附庸国不会接受单方面的共同防御协定。
  • Well, they are EU members now and have formed solidarity pacts with members such as Poland. 他们现在已经是欧盟的一部分了并且他们和欧盟成员诸如波兰等以签署了合作协议。
8 contestants 6183e6ae4586949fe63bec42c8d3a422     
n.竞争者,参赛者( contestant的名词复数 )
参考例句:
  • The competition attracted over 500 contestants representing 8 different countries. 这次比赛吸引了代表8个不同国家的500多名参赛者。
  • Two candidates are emerging as contestants for the presidency. 两位候选人最终成为总统职位竞争者。 来自《简明英汉词典》
9 gene WgKxx     
n.遗传因子,基因
参考例句:
  • A single gene may have many effects.单一基因可能具有很多种效应。
  • The targeting of gene therapy has been paid close attention.其中基因治疗的靶向性是值得密切关注的问题之一。
10 intimidating WqUzKy     
vt.恐吓,威胁( intimidate的现在分词)
参考例句:
  • They were accused of intimidating people into voting for them. 他们被控胁迫选民投他们的票。
  • This kind of questioning can be very intimidating to children. 这种问话的方式可能让孩子们非常害怕。
11 celebrities d38f03cca59ea1056c17b4467ee0b769     
n.(尤指娱乐界的)名人( celebrity的名词复数 );名流;名声;名誉
参考例句:
  • He only invited A-list celebrities to his parties. 他只邀请头等名流参加他的聚会。
  • a TV chat show full of B-list celebrities 由众多二流人物参加的电视访谈节目
12 flipped 5bef9da31993fe26a832c7d4b9630147     
轻弹( flip的过去式和过去分词 ); 按(开关); 快速翻转; 急挥
参考例句:
  • The plane flipped and crashed. 飞机猛地翻转,撞毁了。
  • The carter flipped at the horse with his whip. 赶大车的人扬鞭朝着马轻轻地抽打。
13 anchovies anchovies     
n. 鯷鱼,凤尾鱼
参考例句:
  • a pizza topped with cheese and anchovies 奶酪鳀鱼比萨饼
  • Pesto, mozzarella, parma ham, sun dried tomatoes, egg, anchovies. 核桃香蒜,马苏里拉,巴马火腿,干番茄,鸡蛋,咸鱼。
14 ketchup B3DxX     
n.蕃茄酱,蕃茄沙司
参考例句:
  • There's a spot of ketchup on the tablecloth.桌布上有一点番茄酱的渍斑。
  • Could I have some ketchup and napkins,please?请给我一些番茄酱和纸手巾?
15 relish wBkzs     
n.滋味,享受,爱好,调味品;vt.加调味料,享受,品味;vi.有滋味
参考例句:
  • I have no relish for pop music.我对流行音乐不感兴趣。
  • I relish the challenge of doing jobs that others turn down.我喜欢挑战别人拒绝做的工作。
16 jeopardize s3Qxd     
vt.危及,损害
参考例句:
  • Overworking can jeopardize your health.工作过量可能会危及你的健康。
  • If you are rude to the boss it may jeopardize your chances of success.如果你对上司无礼,那就可能断送你成功的机会。
17 jersey Lp5zzo     
n.运动衫
参考例句:
  • He wears a cotton jersey when he plays football.他穿运动衫踢足球。
  • They were dressed alike in blue jersey and knickers.他们穿着一致,都是蓝色的运动衫和灯笼短裤。
18 hips f8c80f9a170ee6ab52ed1e87054f32d4     
abbr.high impact polystyrene 高冲击强度聚苯乙烯,耐冲性聚苯乙烯n.臀部( hip的名词复数 );[建筑学]屋脊;臀围(尺寸);臀部…的
参考例句:
  • She stood with her hands on her hips. 她双手叉腰站着。
  • They wiggled their hips to the sound of pop music. 他们随着流行音乐的声音摇晃着臀部。 来自《简明英汉词典》
19 concealed 0v3zxG     
a.隐藏的,隐蔽的
参考例句:
  • The paintings were concealed beneath a thick layer of plaster. 那些画被隐藏在厚厚的灰泥层下面。
  • I think he had a gun concealed about his person. 我认为他当时身上藏有一支枪。
20 penal OSBzn     
adj.刑罚的;刑法上的
参考例句:
  • I hope you're familiar with penal code.我希望你们熟悉本州法律规则。
  • He underwent nineteen years of penal servitude for theft.他因犯了大窃案受过十九年的苦刑。
21 tainted qgDzqS     
adj.腐坏的;污染的;沾污的;感染的v.使变质( taint的过去式和过去分词 );使污染;败坏;被污染,腐坏,败坏
参考例句:
  • The administration was tainted with scandal. 丑闻使得政府声名狼藉。
  • He was considered tainted by association with the corrupt regime. 他因与腐败政府有牵连而名誉受损。 来自《简明英汉词典》
22 butt uSjyM     
n.笑柄;烟蒂;枪托;臀部;v.用头撞或顶
参考例句:
  • The water butt catches the overflow from this pipe.大水桶盛接管子里流出的东西。
  • He was the butt of their jokes.他是他们的笑柄。
23 hops a6b9236bf6c7a3dfafdbc0709208acc0     
跳上[下]( hop的第三人称单数 ); 单足蹦跳; 齐足(或双足)跳行; 摘葎草花
参考例句:
  • The sparrow crossed the lawn in a series of hops. 那麻雀一蹦一跳地穿过草坪。
  • It is brewed from malt and hops. 它用麦精和蛇麻草酿成。
24 horrified 8rUzZU     
a.(表现出)恐惧的
参考例句:
  • The whole country was horrified by the killings. 全国都对这些凶杀案感到大为震惊。
  • We were horrified at the conditions prevailing in local prisons. 地方监狱的普遍状况让我们震惊。
25 flinches a85056c91f050da1e215491af49d9215     
v.(因危险和痛苦)退缩,畏惧( flinch的第三人称单数 )
参考例句:
  • The brave man never flinches from danger. 勇敢者在危险面前从不退缩。 来自互联网
  • Aureate scent-bottle can give person sex appeal mature sense, general and young girl flinches. 金色的香水瓶会给人性感成熟的感觉,一般年轻的女孩望而却步。 来自互联网
26 uptight yjXwQ     
adj.焦虑不安的,紧张的
参考例句:
  • He's feeling a bit uptight about his exam tomorrow.他因明天的考试而感到有点紧张。
  • Try to laugh at it instead of getting uptight.试着一笑了之,不要紧张。
27 aged 6zWzdI     
adj.年老的,陈年的
参考例句:
  • He had put on weight and aged a little.他胖了,也老点了。
  • He is aged,but his memory is still good.他已年老,然而记忆力还好。
28 underneath VKRz2     
adj.在...下面,在...底下;adv.在下面
参考例句:
  • Working underneath the car is always a messy job.在汽车底下工作是件脏活。
  • She wore a coat with a dress underneath.她穿着一件大衣,里面套着一条连衣裙。
29 jack 53Hxp     
n.插座,千斤顶,男人;v.抬起,提醒,扛举;n.(Jake)杰克
参考例句:
  • I am looking for the headphone jack.我正在找寻头戴式耳机插孔。
  • He lifted the car with a jack to change the flat tyre.他用千斤顶把车顶起来换下瘪轮胎。
30 filibuster YkXxK     
n.妨碍议事,阻挠;v.阻挠
参考例句:
  • A senator dragged the subject in as a filibuster.一个参议员硬把这个题目拉扯进来,作为一种阻碍议事的手法。
  • The democrats organized a filibuster in the senate.民主党党员在参议院上组织了阻挠议事。
31 addendum FyFzR     
n.补充,附录
参考例句:
  • This is an addendum to the book.这是本书的附录。
  • Six parts and one addendum are separated in the paper.论文由六章和一个附录组成。
32 joint m3lx4     
adj.联合的,共同的;n.关节,接合处;v.连接,贴合
参考例句:
  • I had a bad fall,which put my shoulder out of joint.我重重地摔了一跤,肩膀脫臼了。
  • We wrote a letter in joint names.我们联名写了封信。
33 freshman 1siz9r     
n.大学一年级学生(可兼指男女)
参考例句:
  • Jack decided to live in during his freshman year at college.杰克决定大一时住校。
  • He is a freshman in the show business.他在演艺界是一名新手。
34 giggle 4eNzz     
n.痴笑,咯咯地笑;v.咯咯地笑着说
参考例句:
  • Both girls began to giggle.两个女孩都咯咯地笑了起来。
  • All that giggle and whisper is too much for me.我受不了那些咯咯的笑声和交头接耳的样子。
35 vending 9e89cb67a07fe419b19a6bd5ee5210cc     
v.出售(尤指土地等财产)( vend的现在分词 );(尤指在公共场所)贩卖;发表(意见,言论);声明
参考例句:
  • Why Are You Banging on the Vending Machine? 你为什么敲打这台自动售货机? 来自朗文快捷英语教程 2
  • Coca-Cola had to adapt almost 300,000 vending machines to accept the new coins. 可口可乐公司必须使将近三十万台自动贩卖机接受新货币。 来自超越目标英语 第5册
36 munch E1yyI     
v.用力嚼,大声咀嚼
参考例句:
  • We watched her munch through two packets of peanuts.我们看她津津有味地嚼了两包花生米。
  • Getting them to munch on vegetable dishes was more difficult.使他们吃素菜就比较困难了。
37 standing 2hCzgo     
n.持续,地位;adj.永久的,不动的,直立的,不流动的
参考例句:
  • After the earthquake only a few houses were left standing.地震过后只有几幢房屋还立着。
  • They're standing out against any change in the law.他们坚决反对对法律做任何修改。
38 forth Hzdz2     
adv.向前;向外,往外
参考例句:
  • The wind moved the trees gently back and forth.风吹得树轻轻地来回摇晃。
  • He gave forth a series of works in rapid succession.他很快连续发表了一系列的作品。
39 maple BBpxj     
n.槭树,枫树,槭木
参考例句:
  • Maple sugar is made from the sap of maple trees.枫糖是由枫树的树液制成的。
  • The maple leaves are tinge with autumn red.枫叶染上了秋天的红色。
40 belly QyKzLi     
n.肚子,腹部;(像肚子一样)鼓起的部分,膛
参考例句:
  • The boss has a large belly.老板大腹便便。
  • His eyes are bigger than his belly.他眼馋肚饱。
41 moss X6QzA     
n.苔,藓,地衣
参考例句:
  • Moss grows on a rock.苔藓生在石头上。
  • He was found asleep on a pillow of leaves and moss.有人看见他枕着树叶和苔藓睡着了。
42 fixed JsKzzj     
adj.固定的,不变的,准备好的;(计算机)固定的
参考例句:
  • Have you two fixed on a date for the wedding yet?你们俩选定婚期了吗?
  • Once the aim is fixed,we should not change it arbitrarily.目标一旦确定,我们就不应该随意改变。
43 inferno w7jxD     
n.火海;地狱般的场所
参考例句:
  • Rescue workers fought to get to victims inside the inferno.救援人员奋力营救大火中的受害者。
  • The burning building became an inferno.燃烧着的大楼成了地狱般的地方。
44 groove JeqzD     
n.沟,槽;凹线,(刻出的)线条,习惯
参考例句:
  • They're happy to stay in the same old groove.他们乐于墨守成规。
  • The cupboard door slides open along the groove.食橱门沿槽移开。
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