英语小达人 303 Funny Excuses Notes

 　　Funny Excuses Notes

　　可笑的假条

　　If you think that today's students aren't learning all they should, check out some of the writing miscreated by their moms and dads. The following are some funny excuses notes received by teachers, spelling mistakes included. In these samples, names were replaced with either John or Mary.

　　如果你认为现在的学生没有学好他们该学的，就请你看看他们的爸爸妈妈们写的东西吧。下面是一些家长写给老师的搞笑的假条，里面的拼写错误也原封不动地保留下来。我们只是把其中的名字换成了约翰或玛丽。

　　My son is under a doctor's care and should not take P.E. today. Please execute him.

　　医生在看护我的儿子，他不能上今天的体育课了。请处决他吧。

　　Please excuse Mary for being absent. She was sick and I had her shot.

　　请原谅玛丽不能来上课，她生病了，我找人把她打死了。

　　Dear School: Please ekscuse John being absent on Jan. 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, and also 33.

　　亲爱的校方：约翰1月28、29、30、31、32和33号都不能来上课，请原谅。

　　Please excuse John from P.E. for a few days. He fell yesterday out of a tree and misplaced his hip¹.

　　约翰有几天不能上体育课，请原谅。他昨天从树上掉下来，把屁股摔歪了。

　　John has been absent because he had two teeth taken out of his face.

　　约翰没来上课是因为从他的脸上拔掉了两颗牙。

　　John was absent yesterday because he was playing football. He was hurt in the growing part.

　　约翰昨天没来上课是因为他在踢足球，他伤到了生长的部分【应为growing pains（医）发育期痛】

　　John will not be in school cus he has an acre in his side.

　　约翰不能来上学因为他侧面疼。

　　Please excuse John Friday from school. He has very loose vowels².

　　请原谅约翰星期五没来上学，因为他的元音太松驰了。【应为have loose bowels腹泻】

　　Please excuse John for being absent yesterday. He had diarrhea and his boots leak.

　　请原谅约翰昨天没来上学，他泻肚，他的靴子也漏了。

　　John was absent yesterday because he missed his bust³.

　　约翰昨天没来上课是因为他没被打着。

　　Please excuse John for being. It was his father's fault.

　　请原谅约翰……，这都是他爸爸的错。

　　I kept Mary home because she had to go Christmas shopping because I didn't know what size she wear.

　　我没让玛丽去上学是因为我得带她去圣诞采购，因为我不知道她穿多大的衣服。

　　Please excuse Mary for missing school yesterday. We forgot to get the Sunday paper off the porch⁴, and when we found it Monday, we thought it was Sunday.

　　请原谅玛丽昨天没来上学。我们忘了把星期天那页从走廊上撕下来了。当我们发觉是星期一时，我们还以为是星期天。

　　Mary won't be in school a week from Friday. We have to attend her funeral.

　　从星期五开始的一个星期玛丽都不能来上课，我们要去参加她的葬礼。

　　Please excuse Mary from Jim today. She is administrating.

　　请为吉姆原谅玛丽，她正在处理事务。

　　Mary was absent December 11--16, because she had a fever, sore throat, headache, and upset stomach. Her sister was also sick, fever and sore throat, her brother had a low grade fever and ached all over. I wasn't the berst either, sore throat and fever. There must be the flu going around school, her father got hot last night.

　　12月11到16号玛丽没来是因为她发烧了、嗓子疼、头疼，而且肠胃不舒服。她的妹妹也病了，发烧、嗓子疼。她弟弟也发低烧，浑身疼。我也没能幸免，嗓子疼还发烧。学校里一定是有流感，甚至于昨晚她爸爸也发烧了。

　　My daughter was absent yesterday because she was tired. She spent a weekend with the Marines.

　　昨天我女儿没来上学是因为她太累了，她和海军陆战队一块儿过的周末。

　　Please excuse my son's tardiness⁵. I forgot to wake him up and I did not find him till I started making the beds.

　　请原谅我儿子的拖拖拉拉。我忘了叫他起床了，而且直到铺床的时候我才找到他。

　　Mary could not come to school because she has been bothered by very close veins⁶.

　　玛丽不能来上学是因为她的血管太近了。

　　重点讲解：

　　1. check out

　　了解清楚；核实；查实；

　　eg. Tomorrow , at the bank, I'll try to check out my mom's security system.

　　我明天会去看看银行的安全系统。

　　eg. Check out this link for information on local leagues.

　　查看这个链接来查找当地的组织信息。

　　2. excuse sb. for sth.

　　原谅；宽恕某人某事；

　　eg. Many people might have excused them for shirking some of their responsibilities.

　　很多人可能已经原谅了他们逃避责任的行为。

　　eg. Nothing can possibly excuse him for such rude behavior.

　　他这样粗鲁的行为，无论怎样都不能原谅。

　　3. fall out

　　掉落，脱落；

　　eg. In his sleep he let the book fall out of his hand.

　　他睡着时书从手中掉了下来。

　　eg. My tooth fell out.

　　我的一颗牙掉了。

　　4. all over

　　到处； 遍及；

　　eg. There are papers strewn all over the floor.

　　地板上到处撒满了纸。

　　eg. I itch⁷ all over.

　　我浑身痒。

　　5. forget to do

　　忘记；忘了（做）某事；

　　eg. Don't forget to give me a ring.

　　别忘了给我打电话。

　　eg. Drivers who forget to light up at night often cause accidents.

　　晚上忘记开车灯的司机常常出车祸。

1 hip   

n.臀部，髋；屋脊

参考例句：

• The thigh bone is connected to the hip bone.股骨连着髋骨。
• The new coats blouse gracefully above the hip line.新外套在臀围线上优美地打着褶皱。

2 vowels   

n.元音，元音字母( vowel的名词复数 )

参考例句：

• Vowels possess greater sonority than consonants. 元音比辅音响亮。 来自《现代英汉综合大词典》
• Note the various sounds of vowels followed by r. 注意r跟随的各种元音的发音。 来自超越目标英语 第3册

3 bust   

vt.打破；vi.爆裂；n.半身像；胸部

参考例句：

• I dropped my camera on the pavement and bust it. 我把照相机掉在人行道上摔坏了。
• She has worked up a lump of clay into a bust.她把一块黏土精心制作成一个半身像。

4 porch   

n.门廊，入口处，走廊，游廊

参考例句：

• There are thousands of pages of advertising on our porch.有成千上万页广告堆在我们的门廊上。
• The porch is supported by six immense pillars.门廊由六根大柱子支撑着。

5 tardiness   

n.缓慢；迟延；拖拉

参考例句：

• Her teacher gave her extra homework because of her tardiness. 由于她的迟到，老师给她布置了额外的家庭作业。 来自辞典例句
• Someone said that tardiness is the subtlest form of selflove and conceit. 有人说迟到是自私和自负的最微妙的表现形式。 来自辞典例句

6 veins   

n.纹理；矿脉( vein的名词复数 )；静脉；叶脉；纹理

参考例句：

• The blood flows from the capillaries back into the veins. 血从毛细血管流回静脉。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• I felt a pleasant glow in all my veins from the wine. 喝过酒后我浑身的血都热烘烘的，感到很舒服。 来自《简明英汉词典》

7 itch   

n.痒，渴望，疥癣；vi.发痒，渴望

参考例句：

• Shylock has an itch for money.夏洛克渴望发财。
• He had an itch on his back.他背部发痒。