经典双语笑话 第43期:临时改变主意

 Change of Plan 临时改变主意

Frank and Fred had received their draft notices on the same day, and neither wanted to enter the army. 法兰克和佛烈德两人同一天收到召集令，两人都不想去服兵役。

But Frank had heard that the army would not accept anyone without teeth,  但法兰克曾经听人说军中不收没有牙齿的人，

so they both had all their teeth pulled. 因此他们两人都把所有的牙齿给拔掉了。

On the day of their medical exam, Frank and Fred got in line, but a huge, hairy, smelly truck driver cut in between them. 在体格检查那天，他们两人排在同一排队伍，可是有一个大块头、满身毛发而且臭味难当的卡车司机插在他们中间。

As Frank got up to the head of the line, he announced to the inspecting sergeant¹ that he had no teeth. 当法兰克排到队伍的前头时，他对检查的班长说他没有牙齿，

The sergeant had Frank open his mouth, ran his forefinger³ over the raw gums and said, 那名士官要他张开嘴巴，接着用食指在他红肿的牙龈绕了一圈后说道：

"Sure enough, you don't.  “没错，你没牙齿，

You're rejected. " 不用当兵!”

Turning to the truck driver, he asked, 接着轮到卡车司机，士官说：

"What's your problem?" “你有什么问题吗?”

The trucker said, "I've got a tremendous case of the piles. " 卡车司机说道：“我患有严重的痔疮。”

The sergeant had the fellow bend over, inserted his fore² finger and rotated it around thoroughly⁴, 班长要那个家伙弯下身去，用他的食指在肛门转了一整圈后说道：

"Sure enough, you've got a bad case.  “没错，你的情形很严重，

Rejected!" 不合格!”

Turning to Fred, the sergeant demanded,  再轮到佛烈德时，班长又问：

"And what's your problem?" “那你的问题是什么?”

Staring at the forefinger, Fred replied,  凝视着他的食指，佛烈德答道：

"Nothing at all, sergeant, nothing at all. " “没什么问题，班长，我一点问题也没有。”

1.on the same day 同一天；

例句：There was a strange fatality⁵ about their both losing their jobs on the same day.

他们两人同一天失去工作, 真是天意叵测。

2.medical exam 体检;

例句：When he went for his medical exam, he pretended that his eyesight was very bad.

当他去体检时，他就假装自己的视力很差。

3.run over 浏览；查看

例句：All the best plays were run over in vain.

所有的优秀剧本都考虑过了，没有一本中意。

4.bend over 弯腰；俯身

例句：My chest pains get worse when I bend over or lie down.

我弯腰或躺下时，胸口痛得更厉害。

1 sergeant   

n.警官，中士

参考例句：

• His elder brother is a sergeant.他哥哥是个警官。
• How many stripes are there on the sleeve of a sergeant?陆军中士的袖子上有多少条纹？

2 fore   

adv.在前面；adj.先前的；在前部的；n.前部

参考例句：

• Your seat is in the fore part of the aircraft.你的座位在飞机的前部。
• I have the gift of fore knowledge.我能够未卜先知。

3 forefinger   

n.食指

参考例句：

• He pinched the leaf between his thumb and forefinger.他将叶子捏在拇指和食指之间。
• He held it between the tips of his thumb and forefinger.他用他大拇指和食指尖拿着它。

4 thoroughly   

adv.完全地，彻底地，十足地

参考例句：

• The soil must be thoroughly turned over before planting.一定要先把土地深翻一遍再下种。
• The soldiers have been thoroughly instructed in the care of their weapons.士兵们都系统地接受过保护武器的训练。

5 fatality   

n.不幸，灾祸，天命

参考例句：

• She struggle against fatality in vain.她徒然奋斗反抗宿命。
• He began to have a growing sense of fatality.他开始有一种越来越强烈的宿命感。