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(单词翻译:双击或拖选)
Final Goodbye
"I am going home to Denmark, Son, and I just wanted to tell you I love you."
In my dad's last telephone call to me, he repeated that line seven times in a half hour. I wasn't listening at the right level. I heard the words, but not the message, and certainly not their profound intent. I believed my dad would live to be over 100 years old, as my great uncle lived to be 107 years old. I had not felt his remorse1 over Mom's death, understood his intense loneliness as an "empty nester," or realized most of his pals2 had long since light-beamed off the planet. He relentlessly3 requested my brothers and I create grandchildren so that he could be a devoted4 grandfather. I was too busy "entrepreneuring" to really listen.
"Dad's dead," sighed my brother Brian on July 4, l982.
My little brother is a witty5 lawyer and has a humorous, quick mind. I thought he was setting me up for a joke, and I awaited the punchline6 - there wasn't one. "Dad died in the bed he was born in - in Rozkeldj," continued Brian. "The funeral directors are putting him in a coffin7, and shipping8 Dad and his belongings9 to us tomorrow. We need to prepare for the funeral."
I was speechless. This isn't the way it's supposed to happen. If I knew these were to be Dad's final days, I would have asked to go with him to Denmark. I believe in the hospice movement, which says: "No one should die alone." A loved one should hold your hand and comfort you as you transition from one plane of reality to another. I would have offered consolation10 during his final hour, if I'd been really listening, thinking and in tune11 with the Infinite. Dad announced his departure as best he could, and I had missed it. I felt grief, pain and remorse, Why had I not been there for him? He'd always been there for me.
In the mornings when I was nine years old, he would come home from working 18 hours at his bakery and wake me up at 5:00 A.M. by scratching my back with his strong powerful hands and whispering, "Time to get up, Son." By the time I was dressed and ready to roll, he had my newspapers folded, banded and stuffed in my bicycle basket. Recalling his generosity12 of spirit brings tears to my eyes.
When I was racing13 bicycles, he drove me 50 miles each way to Kenosha, Wisconsin, every Tuesday night so I could race and he could watch me. He was there to hold me if I lost and shared the euphoria when I won.
Later, he accompanied me to all my local talks in Chicago when I spoke14 to Century 21, Mary Kay, Equitable15 and various churches. He always smiled, listened and proudly told whomever he was sitting with, "That's my boy!"
After the fact, my heart was in pain because Dad was there for me and I wasn't there for him. My humble16 advice is to always, always share your love with your loved ones, and ask to be invited to that sacred transitional period where physical life transforms into spiritual life. Experiencing the process of death with one you love will take you into a bigger, more expansive dimension of beingness.
点击收听单词发音
1 remorse | |
n.痛恨,悔恨,自责 | |
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2 pals | |
n.朋友( pal的名词复数 );老兄;小子;(对男子的不友好的称呼)家伙 | |
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3 relentlessly | |
adv.不屈不挠地;残酷地;不间断 | |
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4 devoted | |
adj.忠诚的,忠实的,热心的,献身于...的 | |
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5 witty | |
adj.机智的,风趣的 | |
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6 punchline | |
n.(笑话、故事等的)结尾警语,点睛之笔 | |
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7 coffin | |
n.棺材,灵柩 | |
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8 shipping | |
n.船运(发货,运输,乘船) | |
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9 belongings | |
n.私人物品,私人财物 | |
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10 consolation | |
n.安慰,慰问 | |
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11 tune | |
n.调子;和谐,协调;v.调音,调节,调整 | |
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12 generosity | |
n.大度,慷慨,慷慨的行为 | |
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13 racing | |
n.竞赛,赛马;adj.竞赛用的,赛马用的 | |
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14 spoke | |
n.(车轮的)辐条;轮辐;破坏某人的计划;阻挠某人的行动 v.讲,谈(speak的过去式);说;演说;从某种观点来说 | |
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15 equitable | |
adj.公平的;公正的 | |
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16 humble | |
adj.谦卑的,恭顺的;地位低下的;v.降低,贬低 | |
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