Fishing Larry and Harry drove 500 miles to go fishing. They paid a huge sum to rent a cabin, a similar about to rent a boat. They fished for three days and caught only one fish between them. On the way home, Harry fiddled with a calculator while Larr...
What a world of pathos in this: A barren room, illkempt children, a worn out patient wife, a dissolute husband, and weak. Mary, you ought to have married a better man. John, I did. 一个何等沮丧的情景:空荡荡的屋子,脏兮兮的孩子,...
Clarinet When I played with a symphony orchestra, our union reached an agreement with a major airline about which instruments we could carry on board, and which had to be shipped as luggage. A cellist was dismayed to find that his delicate, expensive...
THE SCHOOL HEALTH FORMS had been distributed to the students with an error---the word Sex had been spelled with an o. One mother, filling out the form for her son, wrote in the blank next to Sox: Usually brown. 某学校发给学生的健康调查表里...
The World's Greatest Swordsman At an exhibition of the world's best swordsman, the third-place fencer took the stage. A fly was released, and with an arc of his sword he cut the fly in half. The crowd cheered. Then the second-place man sliced a fly i...
A Jealous Wife There was once a wife so jealous that when her husband came home one night and she couldnt find hairs on his jackets she yelled at him, Great, so now you re cheating on me with a bald woman! The next night, when she didnt smell any per...
Seth Smith was reckoned the laziest man in town. Sotired had the authorities become of contributing to his supportthat they decided to consign him to a living tomb. Accordinglyhe was prepared for burial. The hearse was an old ramshacklecountry wagon....
An instructor in chemical warfare asked soldiers in his class: Anyone knows the formula for water? Sure. That's easy, said one man. What is it? H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O. What, what? reasked the instructor. H to O, explained the chemistry expert. 生化战...
Uncle Silas had lighted his pipe for a comfortable smoke, when Aunt Rebecca looked up from her knitting and said: Silas, do you know that Sunday next will be the thirtieth anniversary of our wedding? I swan,said Silas,is that so,and what about...
Mr.Green went to Germany,because he had some work there.He came back last Monday,and his young wife met him at the airport.They walked to their car and passed a tall,pretty air hostess.Mr.Green said to her,Goodbye,Miss Harris, a...
I had a schoolmate who had come into school at an age later than usual,and could hardly read.There was a book used by the leaners in reading calledDialogues between a Missionary and an Indian.It was a poor performance,full of inconclusive arg...
DID YOUR DAD HELP YOU? One day, Tim's mathematics teacher looked at his homework and saw that he had got all his sums right. The teacher was very pleased-and rather surprised. He called Tim to his desk and said to him, You got all your homework right...
Hospitality The hostess apologized to her unexpected guest for serving an apple-pie without any cheese. The little boy of the family left the room quietly for a moment and returned with a piece of cheese which he laid on the guest's plate. The visito...
I am the Driver The bus was crowded, and as one more man tried to get on, the passengers wouldn't let him aboard. It's too crowded, they shouted. What do you think you are? I'm the driver, he said. 我是司机 一辆公共汽车已经相当拥挤,还...
A taxi passenger tapped the driver on the shoulder to ask him a question. The driver screamed, lost control of the car, nearly hit a bus, went up on the footpath, and stopped centimetres from a shop window. 乘客轻拍了一下出租车司机的肩膀...