Two ladies were hanging out together and one was depressed. What's wrong?The depressed one replied, I've been married four times and every one of my husbands has passed away.The other lady asked, What did they used to do? The depressed lady replied,...
Having been married ten years and still living in an apartment, the wife would often complain about anything, as she was tired of saving every penny to buy a dream home.Trying to placate (安抚)her, the husband found a new apartment, within their bu...
A young man went shopping. He bought a small can of corn, a small can of tuna(金枪鱼）, a small jar of mayo（蛋黄酱）, a small lemon and a very small box of teabags. When he came to the counter the girl at the cashregister smiled at him and...
The newlyweds entered the elevator of their Miami Beach hotel. The operator, a magnificent blonde, looked at them in surprise and said, Why, hello, Teddy, how are you?A frosty silence prevailed until the couple reached theirroom, when the piqued (愤怒...
A blonde was driving back from the mall when there was a terrible hail storm. Huge hail stones the size of golf balls pelted her car leaving it full of dents(凹, 凹痕). She drove to the body shop (车身修理厂)and asked what she should do. The...
A doctor and his wife were sunbathing on a beach when a well-endowed, beautiful, young, blonde woman in a tight-fitting bikini strolled passed. The woman looked at the doctor, smiled seductively, and said in a very sexy voice, Hi there handsome. How...
A college student wrote a letter home: Dear folks,I feel miserable because I have to keep writing for money. I feel ashamed and unhappy. I have to ask for another hundred, but every cell in my body rebels. I beg on bended knee that you forgive me. Yo...
A blonde was being interviewed by the Chief of Police for an opening in the local Police Department. The chief said that before I hire you I have to ask a few questions. Chief: First how much is 1 and 1. Blonde ElevenChief: Well I guess I will accept...
A young doctor was just setting up his first office when his secretary told him there was a man to see him. The doctor wanted to make a good first impression by having the man think he was successful and very busy. He told his secretary to show the m...
There was a little boy in Kindergarten. He cried, so the teacher asked him what was wrong. He sobbed, I can't find my boots.The teacher looked around the classroom and saw a pair of boots, Are these yours?No, they're not mine, the boy shook his head....
One day our Little niece Rita went up to her mother and asked, Mom, where did I come from?My sister in law stammered (结结巴巴地说)a bit, but finally got her composure(镇静）. She thought it was time her daughter knew the facts of life. So,...
A lawyer and a blonde are sitting next to each other on a long flight from LA to NY. The lawyer leans over to her and asks if she would like to play a fun game. The blonde just wants to take a nap, so she politely declines and rolls over to the windo...
One day a husband was chiding (斥责）his beautiful blonde wife about leavingher keys in the ignition （点火处）of her car. If I take them out of the car I lose them, she reasoned. Yes dear, but what if someone steals your car? the husband cou...
When the waitress in a New York City restaurant brought him the soup du jour, the Englishman was a bit dismayed. Good heavens, he said, what is this?Why, it's bean soup, she replied. I don't care what it's been, he replied. What is it now?...
This blonde decides one day that she is sick and tired of all the blonde jokes and how all blondes are perceived as stupid, so she decides to show her husband that blondes really are smart. While her husband is off at work, she decides that she is go...
