读者文摘:因为你与我同在(3)

When I enter Pete's home, he's in the bedroom with Jimmie's body, sitting on the bed stroking her hair.

我走进皮特的家，吉米躺在床上，皮特抚摸着她的头发。

I sit beside him. He's a big, rough-looking man with a crooked¹ nose and muscular, tattooed² forearms.

我坐在他旁边，他块头很大，长相粗犷，鹰钩鼻，前臂上有纹身，肌肉发达。

"I let her down," he says. "Spent my time working. Never told her I loved her."

“我让她失望了，”他说。“我一直在工作，从来没有告诉过她我爱她。”

Rather than let him get sucked into a narrative³ of guilt⁴, I ask what he did do.

为了不让他陷入自责，我问他做过的事。

He describes spending long days at the oncology clinic,

他描述了在肿瘤诊所度过的漫长日子，

building a wheelchair ramp⁵ so she could smell her rosebushes,

他做了一个轮椅坡道好让吉米闻到玫瑰花香，

working extra shifts to pay for her medications.

他加班给吉米支付医药费。

Using memories like these, we zero in on how he'd expressed his love—

凭借着这些记忆，我们明白了皮特表达爱意的方式——

not through words but through gestures of affection and acts of loyalty⁶ and sacrifice.

不是言语，而是爱意，忠诚和牺牲。

We talk throughout the night.

我们彻夜长谈。

Eventually Pete lets me call his buddy⁷ Tank, who shows up just as the funeral home people arrive.

最终皮特让我给他的好友汤克打电话，汤克是和殡仪馆一起来的那个人。

Pete, Tank, and I discuss Pete's threats and what's driving them.

我和皮特、汤克讨论了皮特的危险处境和原因。

I talk about coping strategies and optimizing⁸ support.

我提出了应对策略和优化方案。

But these textbook recommendations take a back seat to the simple imperative⁹

但这些建议不及简单地——

to open my heart and be fully¹⁰ present to someone who's hurting.

敞开心扉，全身心抚慰受伤的人。

And that, I've come to believe, is what Claude was talking about:

我开始相信，这就是克劳德所说的：

the power of moving toward another's suffering rather than away.

怀抱而不是远离所带来的力量。

Driving home, exhausted¹¹, I reflect on the words Tank left with me.

驱车回家时，我疲惫不堪，想起了汤克留给我的那句话。

"You got him through the night, Scott," he said.

“斯科特，你让他熬过了这一夜，”汤克说。

"Me and my wife'll take it from here. I promise."

“我和我妻子会重新出发，我保证。”

I feel sad for Pete's loss. But I know he'll be surrounded by love.

我为皮特失去所爱之人感到难过，但我知道包围他的是满满的爱。

And in my mind's eye, I see Claude lifting his beer bottle and giving me one of his crooked smiles.

在脑海中，我看到克劳德举起啤酒瓶，向我露出一丝狡黠的微笑。

1 crooked   

adj.弯曲的；不诚实的，狡猾的，不正当的

参考例句：

• He crooked a finger to tell us to go over to him.他弯了弯手指，示意我们到他那儿去。
• You have to drive slowly on these crooked country roads.在这些弯弯曲曲的乡间小路上你得慢慢开车。

2 tattooed   

v.刺青，文身( tattoo的过去式和过去分词 )；连续有节奏地敲击；作连续有节奏的敲击

参考例句：

• He had tattooed his wife's name on his upper arm. 他把妻子的名字刺在上臂上。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• The sailor had a heart tattooed on his arm. 那水兵在手臂上刺上一颗心。 来自《现代英汉综合大词典》

3 narrative   

n.叙述，故事；adj.叙事的，故事体的

参考例句：

• He was a writer of great narrative power.他是一位颇有记述能力的作家。
• Neither author was very strong on narrative.两个作者都不是很善于讲故事。

4 guilt   

n.犯罪；内疚；过失，罪责

参考例句：

• She tried to cover up her guilt by lying.她企图用谎言掩饰自己的罪行。
• Don't lay a guilt trip on your child about schoolwork.别因为功课责备孩子而使他觉得很内疚。

5 ramp   

n.暴怒，斜坡，坡道；vi.作恐吓姿势，暴怒，加速；vt.加速

参考例句：

• That driver drove the car up the ramp.那司机将车开上了斜坡。
• The factory don't have that capacity to ramp up.这家工厂没有能力加速生产。

6 loyalty   

n.忠诚，忠心

参考例句：

• She told him the truth from a sense of loyalty.她告诉他真相是出于忠诚。
• His loyalty to his friends was never in doubt.他对朋友的一片忠心从来没受到怀疑。

7 buddy   

n.（美口）密友，伙伴

参考例句：

• Calm down,buddy.What's the trouble?压压气，老兄。有什么麻烦吗？
• Get out of my way,buddy!别挡道了，你这家伙！

8 optimizing   

v.使最优化，使尽可能有效( optimize的现在分词 )；最佳化；寻优

参考例句：

• This model may be classified as either an optimizing model or simulation model. 这个模型可分为最佳化模型或模拟模型。 来自辞典例句
• Need to design crossover operator rationally while optimizing ANN. 优化网络需要合理设计交叉算子。 来自互联网

9 imperative   

n.命令，需要；规则；祈使语气；adj.强制的；紧急的

参考例句：

• He always speaks in an imperative tone of voice.他老是用命令的口吻讲话。
• The events of the past few days make it imperative for her to act.过去这几天发生的事迫使她不得不立即行动。

10 fully   

adv.完全地，全部地，彻底地；充分地

参考例句：

• The doctor asked me to breathe in,then to breathe out fully.医生让我先吸气，然后全部呼出。
• They soon became fully integrated into the local community.他们很快就完全融入了当地人的圈子。

11 exhausted   

adj.极其疲惫的，精疲力尽的

参考例句：

• It was a long haul home and we arrived exhausted.搬运回家的这段路程特别长，到家时我们已筋疲力尽。
• Jenny was exhausted by the hustle of city life.珍妮被城市生活的忙乱弄得筋疲力尽。